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just-shower-thoughts: We all can recognize our family members walking by the sound of their steps, but most of us don’t know how we sound ourselves.
just-shower-thoughts:There are branches of science that don’t technically exist yet
just-shower-thoughts:The biggest turn on is seeing how much you turn them on.
just-shower-thoughts:It’s stupid to have children if you don’t even like yourself.
just-shower-thoughts: Actors are getting fired and blacklisted when questionable statements are dug up from decades ago. Police can murder and their jobs are safe as long as it’s not on camera.
just-shower-thoughts:Every Queen ant is actually descended from a previous queen ant, making ant societies actual monarchies.
just-shower-thoughts:Money can’t buy you happiness, but it can prevent unhappiness. Oh for fuck sake yes it can. Stop spreading stupid myths.In everything from antidepressants and other medication, to a place to call home and possibilities to do actually
just-shower-thoughts:Politics becomes even more depressing when you realize that it’s literally a never-ending series of popularity contests.
just-shower-thoughts:When you roll over in bed, it’s kind of like your pillow is flipping you to your cool side.
just-shower-thoughts: If you are born in Australia and immediately fly to New York you will be negative age
just-shower-thoughts: Kids these days will never know the thrill of picking up a ringing payphone and answering, “County morgue, you stab ‘em we slab ‘em.”
just-shower-thoughts: If you don’t look back on your past self and cringe, then you didn’t grow as a person.
just-shower-thoughts: I procrastinate because I am stressed. I am stressed because I procrastinate.
just-shower-thoughts: Any machine can be a smoke machine if you use it wrong enough.
just-shower-thoughts: In the last few months, I think I’ve seen the American Flags around town at half-staff more than full-staff.
just-shower-thoughts: If people were really named by occupation in the Middle Ages, I’m curious to find out what the first Dickinson did for a living
just-shower-thoughts: When you lay awake at night, your brain is that one guy at the sleepover that all the other organs wish would shut up and go to sleep. Yeeeeeeeeeep
Just washing his huge uncut cock in the forest.
just-shower-thoughts: While growing up, the Bermuda Triangle seemed like a real threat for a while there. So you’re saying there is absolutely no threat there now or ever was?
just-shower-thoughts: Spiders are the only type of web developers who are happy to find bugs
just-shower-thoughts: If the Minions exist to serve the evilest person alive, then there were probably Minions working at Auschwitz.
just-shower-thoughts:If most guys wake up with morning wood that means the earth is constantly doing “the wave” with boners. this post recently went through my dash and it got me thinking about something.According to quantum field theory, certain
just-shower-thoughts: If roles were reversed and female orgasm was a required part of the impregnation process, there would be a lot less unplanned pregnancies.
just-shower-thoughts: Jesus died for our sins. If you’re not sinning, you’re basically making it so that Jesus died for nothing.
just-shower-thoughts: I’ve spanked my wife way more than her parent ever did.
just-shower-thoughts: Accidentally biting your tongue/lip is the real life equivalent of “It hurt itself in its confusion!”
just-shower-thoughts:The Leaning Tower of Pisa is an architectural version of “it’s not a bug, it’s a feature.”
just-shower-thoughts: Andromeda Galaxy is going to collide with the Milky way in 4 billion years. We still have time to rename Andromeda to Cookie Way.
just-shower-thoughts:In LOTR “Looks like meat’s back on the menu, boys” implies that Orcs know what a menu is, and have therefore been to a restaurant. I wonder what a restaurant in Mordor is like.
just-shower-thoughts: Bad handwriting is like mumbling on paper.
just-shower-thoughts: If Minecraft Steve goes through puberty, will he get cubic hair?
just-shower-thoughts: Is a group of squids called a squad? @fuckyeabird yesss
just-shower-thoughts: Viagra is technically “a hard pill to swallow.”
just-shower-thoughts: We don’t have to mark something NSFW if everyone is working from home.
just-shower-thoughts: Everybody wants to be a part of a historic event but probably not this one.
just-shower-thoughts: girls in porn are so happy after a facial because they finished working
just-shower-thoughts: I wonder how many strangers have heard stories about me.
just-shower-thoughts: :Weed should be served as an appetizer in restaurants so customers will order more food and it will taste better
just-shower-thoughts: When ever I think I’m going to get laid I ferociously clean my room. It’s a win/win regardless of if I get laid or not
just-shower-thoughts:You know you’ve really reached adulthood when you start having opinions about grocery stores.
just-shower-thoughts: There’s a petition to have The Last Jedi stricken from the Star Wars canon. You’d think Star Wars fans would realize that if you strike something down it will become more powerful than you could possibly imagine. Touchè
just-shower-thoughts:Feels like we’re stuck on Sunday
just-shower-thoughts: Pizzas have circular shapes, are placed into square boxes and then are eaten in triangles.
just-shower-thoughts: If you drink vanilla coffee, you’re drinking a bean flavored bean.
just-shower-thoughts: It’s stupid how much we could get done as Internet users if we, instead of troll, were helpful. ♡.KT
just-shower-thoughts: Dracula had it right; sleep all day, live alone in a castle and explode into a hundred bats to avoid social interactions.
just-shower-thoughts: If someone is excited about something and you make them feel stupid for feeling excited about it, you are officially the worst type of person.
just-shower-thoughts: If, according to Kanye West, one good girl is worth a thousand bitches, and if, according to Lil’ Wayne, bitches come a dime a dozen, that means one good girl is worth Ű.33 (USD).
just-shower-thoughts: Amish people are the one demographic you can make fun of on the internet and know that nobody will be offended.
just-shower-thoughts: As an atheist, putting my hand on the Bible and saying an oath before testifying to a court is less likely to get me to tell the truth than a pinkey promise
just-shower-thoughts: I wish saying “Sorry, I’ve been depressed the past couple of days, but I’m ok now.” was as socially acceptable as “Sorry, I’ve been really sick the past couple of days, but I’m ok now.”
just-shower-thoughts: In a few generations, kids will be frustratedly trying to remember today’s date for a U.S. history test.
just-shower-thoughts:The opposite of Alec Baldwin is Alec Hairloss
just-shower-thoughts:A woman carrying twin boys literally has more balls than her husband
just-shower-thoughts:If you take the first two parts of Sweden and Denmark you get Sweden, the last two parts and you get Denmark. oooOOOooo
just-shower-thoughts:On this day (02/22/2019), in three years, it will be Tuesday, making 02/22/2022 the true 2sday
just-shower-thoughts:5G conspiracy theorists will be up to 30 times faster than 4G conspiracy theorists.
just-shower-thoughts: A lot of people can say they have a body like Thor’s now.
just-shower-thoughts: I hate those really vivid dreams that you’re still emotionally attached to after you wake up. You’re stuck, feeling for something that technically doesn’t exist.
just-shower-thoughts: Medusa’s OnlyFans could make men rock hard all over the world.
