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“Your love is more intoxicating than John’s stag night.”

“Your love is more intoxicating than John’s stag night.”

“I heard you said you wanted to ‘do Molly’… I hope you didn’t mean the drug.”

“I heard you said you wanted to ‘do Molly’… I hope you didn’t mean the drug.”

“I bet I could lick your face way better than Magnussen did.”

“I bet I could lick your face way better than Magnussen did.”

“Your face is more perfectly sculpted than Moriarty’s eyebrows.”

“Your face is more perfectly sculpted than Moriarty’s eyebrows.”

“I don’t take sugar in my coffee, but I’d love to get some sugar from you.”

“I don’t take sugar in my coffee, but I’d love to get some sugar from you.”

“I love you more than Mycroft loves his umbrella.”

“I love you more than Mycroft loves his umbrella.”

“I would help fix the afferent neurons in your peripheral nervous system.”

“I would help fix the afferent neurons in your peripheral nervous system.”

“So, I heard you want the D… and I don’t mean your division.”

“So, I heard you want the D… and I don’t mean your division.”

“You don’t need to be a vicar with a bleeding face in order to see me naked.”

“You don’t need to be a vicar with a bleeding face in order to see me naked.”

“You’re more addictive than a seven percent solution.”

“You’re more addictive than a seven percent solution.”

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“Your teeth are whiter than Molly’s lab coat.”

“Your teeth are whiter than Molly’s lab coat.”

“Someone stalking me isn’t the only ‘personal matter’ I’d like to write to you about.”

“Someone stalking me isn’t the only ‘personal matter’ I’d like to write to you about.”

“Are you Anderson? Because I want to ‘Phillip’ your hole with my cock.”

“Are you Anderson? Because I want to ‘Phillip’ your hole with my cock.”

“Mrs. Hudson offered me a cup of tea, but I’d much rather have a drink of you.”

“Mrs. Hudson offered me a cup of tea, but I’d much rather have a drink of you.”

“My shirt buttons may strain to get away from me, but I bet you won’t.”

“My shirt buttons may strain to get away from me, but I bet you won’t.”

“I don’t care if you’re wearing ‘gay’ underwear… I’m about to rip it off of you anyway.”

“I don’t care if you’re wearing ‘gay’ underwear… I’m about to rip it off of you anyway.”

“I would let you take a bite of my Appledore.”

“I would let you take a bite of my Appledore.”

“The handle of my umbrella isn’t the only thing I have that’s ribbed.”

“The handle of my umbrella isn’t the only thing I have that’s ribbed.”

“You don’t need to make me inhale Project H.O.U.N.D. fog in order to take my breath away.”

“You don’t need to make me inhale Project H.O.U.N.D. fog in order to take my breath away.”

“You’re hotter than the bonfire I put John in.”

“You’re hotter than the bonfire I put John in.”

“Wanna come to my Mori-party?”

“Wanna come to my Mori-party?”

“I want to text you more often than Irene texted Sherlock.”

“I want to text you more often than Irene texted Sherlock.”

“You’re more fun than a woman lying dead.”

“You’re more fun than a woman lying dead.”

“I bet I can find your G spot quicker than Sherlock finds clues.”

“I bet I can find your G spot quicker than Sherlock finds clues.”

“Returning your coat isn’t my only reason for sneaking into your bedroom.”

“Returning your coat isn’t my only reason for sneaking into your bedroom.”

“‘Vatican cameos’ can be our safeword.”

“‘Vatican cameos’ can be our safeword.”

“I’m sorry you don’t like Harold on my face… Perhaps you’d prefer him in between your thighs?”

“I’m sorry you don’t like Harold on my face… Perhaps you’d prefer him in between your thighs?”

“Without you, I’m lonelier than Mycroft on Christmas.”

“Without you, I’m lonelier than Mycroft on Christmas.”

“I know you’re for real… Nobody could fake having such an amazing dick all the time.”

“I know you’re for real… Nobody could fake having such an amazing dick all the time.”

“You’re not like Magnussen’s spectacles… You are anything but ordinary.”

“You’re not like Magnussen’s spectacles… You are anything but ordinary.”

“I love you more than Sherlock loves bees.”

“I love you more than Sherlock loves bees.”

“You’re the stars to my Sherlock: I think you’re beautiful even when I don’t understand you.”

“You’re the stars to my Sherlock: I think you’re beautiful even when I don’t understand you.”

“Without you, my world is as dark as Laura’s attire.”

“Without you, my world is as dark as Laura’s attire.”

“You don’t need to manipulate security cameras to convince me to get into your car.”

“You don’t need to manipulate security cameras to convince me to get into your car.”

“I want you in my life more permanently than a Black Lotus tattoo.”

“I want you in my life more permanently than a Black Lotus tattoo.”

“I know you like to hold your umbrella all the time, but I wish you would hold my hand instead.”

“I know you like to hold your umbrella all the time, but I wish you would hold my hand instead.”

“Why have Lestrade when you can have More-trade?”

“Why have Lestrade when you can have More-trade?”

“You’re the fence to my John… I can’t get over you.”

“You’re the fence to my John… I can’t get over you.”

“When you said you were on tinder, I realize you meant buried in Magnussen’s bonfire, but I’d still like to swipe right.”

“When you said you were on tinder, I realize you meant buried in Magnussen’s bonfire, but I’d still like to swipe right.”

“Just call me a Baskerville Hound, because I can’t keep my paws off of you.”

“Just call me a Baskerville Hound, because I can’t keep my paws off of you.”

“Your wit is sharper than Irene Adler’s heels.”

“Your wit is sharper than Irene Adler’s heels.”

“John says I’m a machine… Want to see if you can turn me on?”

“John says I’m a machine… Want to see if you can turn me on?”

“Mycroft says that you have the brain of a scientist or a philosopher, but I think you have the brain of my future husband.”

“Mycroft says that you have the brain of a scientist or a philosopher, but I think you have the brain of my future husband.”

“If you were a dismembered country squire, I’d make a date with you no matter how difficult you were to schedule.”

“If you were a dismembered country squire, I’d make a date with you no matter how difficult you were to schedule.”

“It was hard choosing between the two pills… But you’ve always been my first choice.”Submitted by thats-what-people-brew.

“It was hard choosing between the two pills… But you’ve always been my first choice.”Submitted by thats-what-people-brew.

“Broadly speaking, I’d like to have a ‘function’ in your ‘narrative.’“

“Broadly speaking, I’d like to have a ‘function’ in your ‘narrative.’“

“I’m not a plot device… The only function I want in your narrative is love interest.”

“I’m not a plot device… The only function I want in your narrative is love interest.”

“Forget finding the country squire’s legs– I’d much rather have a look at yours.”

“Forget finding the country squire’s legs– I’d much rather have a look at yours.”

“I put the D in Adler.”Submitted by estrangedgearbox.

“I put the D in Adler.”Submitted by estrangedgearbox.

“Will you be the cigarette to my Sherlock? I want to put my lips around you.”

“Will you be the cigarette to my Sherlock? I want to put my lips around you.”

“John says I tend to rub people up the wrong way, but I bet I can rub you right where you like it.”

“John says I tend to rub people up the wrong way, but I bet I can rub you right where you like it.”

“So, you’re on IDatedAGhost.com… Does that mean you’re looking for a boo?”

“So, you’re on IDatedAGhost.com… Does that mean you’re looking for a boo?”

“Graham, Gavin, Geoff… I can be whoever you want me to be.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“Graham, Gavin, Geoff… I can be whoever you want me to be.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“Anderson, face the other way. You’re making me blush.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“Anderson, face the other way. You’re making me blush.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“Oscillation on the pavement means I love you.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“Oscillation on the pavement means I love you.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“It’s fine. It’s all fine when you’re around.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“It’s fine. It’s all fine when you’re around.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“You make me want to scrub your floors and wear men’s deodorant.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“You make me want to scrub your floors and wear men’s deodorant.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“I don’t have friends, just potential love interests.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“I don’t have friends, just potential love interests.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“Unlike my work for the British government, I occupy a major position in the bedroom.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“Unlike my work for the British government, I occupy a major position in the bedroom.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

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