shower thoughts
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im-the-batmann: beardset: just-shower-thoughts: December 31, 2017 is the only day where every adult was born in the 1900’s and everyone else under 18 was born in the 2000’s I don’t like this post
just-shower-thoughts: People ask you what you do for a living so that they can calculate the level of respect to give you.
thefatdrake: lethal-cuddles: joshscorcher: just-shower-thoughts: Chess was one of the first games to feature a strong female lead. <—
just-shower-thoughts:Easter is on April 1st this year, which works because nothing is a bigger April Fools joke when you open up a tomb three days later and the dude’s gone.
ourloveislegendrarry: just-shower-thoughts: You can tell a lot about someone by whether they read HP as horsepower or hit points. harry potter
cincosechzehn: wombatking: prokopetz: yomommaboyfriend: just-shower-thoughts: If Goldilocks tried three beds, then Momma Bear and Daddy Bear slept separately. Baby Bear is probably the only thing keeping the family together. You ain’t have to
im-the-batmann: just-shower-thoughts: Fitbits are just like Tamagotchis, except the stupid little creature you have to keep alive is yourself.
just-shower-thoughts:When you’re a kid you wish you could stay up late but you can’t. When you’re an adult you wish you could go to bed early but you can’t.
just-shower-thoughts:Instead of looking up into the sky you’re actually gazing down into the infinite cosmic abyss with only gravity keeping you from falling.
firebreathingbitchqueenx: just-shower-thoughts: People without glasses are really out here seeing for free Oh my god I really do have to pay to see what the fuck
sarahthephoenix: zebcuson: scribblerextraordinaire: just-shower-thoughts: Based on genital structure men should really be the ones wearing skirts and women should be wearing pants. The Scots were right all along The Scots did it to hide more knives
younowwantcheeseontoast: just-shower-thoughts: Cassettes had side A and side B, therefore it was kind of logical its succesor would be the CD. fuck this post
just-shower-thoughts:“Don’t you dare” sounds fine, but “Do not you dare” sounds ridiculous.
spejoku: just-shower-thoughts: “It’s Raining Men” and “(Let the) Bodies (Hit the Floor)” may be about the same event. Hallelujah
egg-with-a-butt: just-shower-thoughts: How can your body replicate the feeling of falling from high altitudes in a nightmare if you’ve never fallen like that before? I don’t know but I don’t like this post.
just-shower-thoughts: Social anxiety is basically conspiracy theories about yourself
just-shower-thoughts: Becoming an adult is like looking left and right before finally crossing the street and then getting hit by a helicopter.
just-shower-thoughts:A man shouldn’t say anything to a woman online or in a club that he wouldn’t want a man saying to him in prison.
drinking-tea-at-midnight: just-shower-thoughts:Due to the evolution of bacteria with respect to our immune system, if you travelled back in time with a flu, you could potentially kill everyone on Earth.
cocainesocialist: just-shower-thoughts: We’re lucky that our bodies require sleep, otherwise our cultures would have us working 16-20 hour days. ‘our cultures’ it’s not our culture to overwork ourselves, it’s the result of an economic system
drinking-tea-at-midnight: ffa-trash: dumbass-feeder: just-shower-thoughts: The world would be a much nicer place if you got fat from being an asshole instead of eating food. @feedeeadventures would be 62 pounds @fatterigrow would be like -23 lbs
kleenexwoman: iwilltrytobereasonable: just-shower-thoughts: If all roads lead to Rome, how do you actually get out of Rome ? Take any road, it’ll work eventually. FACE ROME AND WALK BACKWARDS INTO GAUL
just-shower-thoughts:Because people are often buried in their best clothes, a zombie apocalypse would be a very formal affair.
fattyatomicmutant: churchyardgrim: slightlyfrumiousbandersnatch: just-shower-thoughts: The fact that we can accidentally bite the insides of our cheeks has to be the biggest design flaw of the human body. NO SORRY IT’S THE FACT THAT OUR TRACHEA AND
keepcalmandcarrieunderwood: just-shower-thoughts: If you die while making food in a slow cooker, whoever finds your body will have a nice warm meal waiting for them. They can also eat whatever is in the slow cooker too
californiadreamboy: bemineunderthestars: just-shower-thoughts: Whoever coined the term coined the term coined the term coined the term Yes hi I hate English
ohheyitsshanaj: anarchyinblack: just-shower-thoughts: All churches should be homeless shelters at night Good thing the government is here to keep us safe from giving people shelter
toastpotent: garbage-empress: garbage-empress: suchdreadfullittlethingsweare: just-shower-thoughts: If you have ũ,000 in cash and spend 1 penny, that’s the equivalent of Jeff Bezos spending ũ.5 million Good for him. Money doesn’t just fall
coaltar-of-the-deepers: just-shower-thoughts: If you have ũ,000 in cash and spend 1 penny, that’s the equivalent of Jeff Bezos spending ũ.5 million
dukeofbookingham: agreyjaywooo: dukeofbookingham: quasi-normalcy: toastpotent: garbage-empress: garbage-empress: suchdreadfullittlethingsweare: just-shower-thoughts: If you have ũ,000 in cash and spend 1 penny, that’s the equivalent of
drinking-tea-at-midnight: posthardcoredepression: just-shower-thoughts: Belts are progress bars on how fat you are. I bought my first XL belt the other week and even then I had to put extra holes in it. the only use for belts imo
drinking-tea-at-midnight: just-shower-thoughts:In the 50s people fantasised about robots doing all our jobs. Now we are terrified by the idea. in the 50′s wealth was redistributed in a way that robots taking over jobs would have had a net gain of helping
just-shower-thoughts: Meatballs are just the cupcake versions of meatloaf
just-shower-thoughts:We only have computer viruses because people are assholes.
just-shower-thoughts:Farts are harmless but are very taboo yet sneezing is casual and can easily carry deadly diseases.
oopsharold: gay-armadillo: tatt00ine: ilikechildren–fried: jetpack-jenny: celticpyro: a-case-of-tragic-magic: just-shower-thoughts: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life #it would be nice
just-shower-thoughts:There’s something deeply comforting about the sound of rain you’re protected from
just-shower-thoughts: People who like rocks see cool rocks everywhere. People who like birds see interesting birds everywhere. The tree on your yard could be an exceptional specimen. The world around you could be amazing and magical, but you aren’t
littlemissonewhoisall: brehaaorgana: earthshaker1217: mrbenibo: just-shower-thoughts: The story of Superman and Moses are actually very similar. Both were sent away in a capsule, as their family was about to be killed, and were adopted into another
