shower thoughts
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epikalia: just-shower-thoughts: If you aren’t at least a little ashamed of your country’s history, you don’t know your country’s history. Good rule of thumb bruh I’m ashamed of current history sad story fam
kayotics: murphystopheles: sassyandpunk: ireallyluvdogs: witwitch: lachatteestvivante: just-shower-thoughts: In the USA, it’s 100x cheaper to take an Uber to the hospital instead of an ambulance. I don’t know if this is true or..Like, having
just-shower-thoughts: Jesus died for our sins. If you’re not sinning, you’re basically making it so that Jesus died for nothing.
just-shower-thoughts: I’ve spanked my wife way more than her parent ever did.
the-m-is-for-misanthropy: just-shower-thoughts: Accents are fonts but for a person
wackd: somethingfangirly: just-shower-thoughts: Every computer needs a “cleaning keyboard” mode where the keys would be inactive while you wipe them down why not just clean it while the computer is shut down? while the computer is what now
thescalexwrites: just-shower-thoughts: While “don’t you dare” is grammatically fine, “do not you dare” just sounds plain wrong. I’ve two cats. Don’t tell me not to, because I’ll. I think, therefore I’m. Can you believe the temperature
bogleech: janothar: just-shower-thoughts: Next time a conspiracy theorist tries to tell you ‘what really happened’, present a more outlandish theory and accuse them of covering up the truth. Conspiracy Theorist: “The moon landing was faked!”
stygianmoon: violentadd: just-shower-thoughts: An assassin is really just a serial killer who takes requests. Excuse you, they take commissions “hey man can you kill this guy?” “alright that will be 10k” “ugh cant you just do it for
just-shower-thoughts: Accidentally biting your tongue/lip is the real life equivalent of “It hurt itself in its confusion!”
just-shower-thoughts:The Leaning Tower of Pisa is an architectural version of “it’s not a bug, it’s a feature.”
just-shower-thoughts: Andromeda Galaxy is going to collide with the Milky way in 4 billion years. We still have time to rename Andromeda to Cookie Way.
biwitched: just-shower-thoughts: The division symbol, ÷, is just a blank fraction. You replace the dots with the numbers.
just-shower-thoughts:In LOTR “Looks like meat’s back on the menu, boys” implies that Orcs know what a menu is, and have therefore been to a restaurant. I wonder what a restaurant in Mordor is like.
just-shower-thoughts: Bad handwriting is like mumbling on paper.
just-shower-thoughts: If Minecraft Steve goes through puberty, will he get cubic hair?
just-shower-thoughts: I don’t find myself unattractive, but I also don’t find myself attractive. I feel like I’m just sort of here, not something that really grabs anyone’s attention. Sort of like a chair. Or a lamp.
just-shower-thoughts: Is a group of squids called a squad? @fuckyeabird yesss
just-shower-thoughts: Viagra is technically “a hard pill to swallow.”
just-shower-thoughts: We don’t have to mark something NSFW if everyone is working from home.
just-shower-thoughts: Everybody wants to be a part of a historic event but probably not this one.
just-shower-thoughts: girls in porn are so happy after a facial because they finished working
just-shower-thoughts: I wonder how many strangers have heard stories about me.
just-shower-thoughts: :Weed should be served as an appetizer in restaurants so customers will order more food and it will taste better
just-shower-thoughts: When ever I think I’m going to get laid I ferociously clean my room. It’s a win/win regardless of if I get laid or not
just-shower-thoughts:You know you’ve really reached adulthood when you start having opinions about grocery stores.
just-shower-thoughts: There’s a petition to have The Last Jedi stricken from the Star Wars canon. You’d think Star Wars fans would realize that if you strike something down it will become more powerful than you could possibly imagine. Touchè
just-shower-thoughts:Feels like we’re stuck on Sunday
thingofnewyork: just-shower-thoughts: Why are girls embarrassed when in a bra and underwear yet eager to be in an even more revealing bikini? Consent. If a girl is out in her bikini, she wants to be seen. She is outside because she wants to be and
amityyaffliction: paradisiak: just-shower-thoughts: As an adult, I can quite literally do whatever I want to, but I always end up wanting to just go home. I’ve never seen anything more accurate @whereismy-fantasy
just-shower-thoughts: “You’re Pre-qualified!” on a piece of mail basically just translates to “We have your address!”.
archonthemanic: just-shower-thoughts: You’re the bad guy in somebody’s story. Pal I’m the bad guy in MY story
just-shower-thoughts: Pizzas have circular shapes, are placed into square boxes and then are eaten in triangles.
just-shower-thoughts: If you drink vanilla coffee, you’re drinking a bean flavored bean.
just-shower-thoughts: In the future, saying someone’s eyes are like the sea will be a roast as it’ll just be full of trash and pollution.
just-shower-thoughts: For me, NSFW links just make me hold my phone a different way.
just-shower-thoughts: It’s stupid how much we could get done as Internet users if we, instead of troll, were helpful. ♡.KT
yourmutualfriends: just-shower-thoughts: We don’t have voluntary control over our internal organs because our brains don’t trust us enough to keep ourselves alive. *gets dumped once* Shuttem down girls it’s over
just-shower-thoughts: Dracula had it right; sleep all day, live alone in a castle and explode into a hundred bats to avoid social interactions.
just-shower-thoughts: If someone is excited about something and you make them feel stupid for feeling excited about it, you are officially the worst type of person.
just-shower-thoughts: If, according to Kanye West, one good girl is worth a thousand bitches, and if, according to Lil’ Wayne, bitches come a dime a dozen, that means one good girl is worth Ű.33 (USD).
just-shower-thoughts: Amish people are the one demographic you can make fun of on the internet and know that nobody will be offended.
phasmascaptain: just-shower-thoughts: Everything in the universe is either a potato or not a potato.
gunnyryan: just-shower-thoughts: Ribbed condoms don’t even taste like ribs. Who the fuck wrote this Lmaoooooo
just-shower-thoughts: As an atheist, putting my hand on the Bible and saying an oath before testifying to a court is less likely to get me to tell the truth than a pinkey promise
just-shower-thoughts: I wish saying “Sorry, I’ve been depressed the past couple of days, but I’m ok now.” was as socially acceptable as “Sorry, I’ve been really sick the past couple of days, but I’m ok now.”
just-shower-thoughts: In a few generations, kids will be frustratedly trying to remember today’s date for a U.S. history test.
qalaxyqirl:tumb1r–wh0re: just-shower-thoughts: Technically, you can go the rest of your life without eating Really? Yeah. You’d starve to death, but it technically was the rest of your life
mushroomnixies:just-shower-thoughts: It is amazing to think that nighttime is actually the natural state of the universe, and the only reason we have daytime is because Earth just so happens to be facing a giant star illuminating it. This fucked me
tess-tess-tessa: just-shower-thoughts: Spiderman would be way less cool if he wasn’t living in a city full of skyscrapers.
zouisprideflag: just-shower-thoughts: Today’s date is 2²/3²/4². YOU CAN ONLY REBLOG THIS TODAY
katherine-rose: just-shower-thoughts: Cannibalism would fix hunger problems and overpopulation at the same time
just-shower-thoughts:The opposite of Alec Baldwin is Alec Hairloss
just-shower-thoughts:A woman carrying twin boys literally has more balls than her husband
just-shower-thoughts:If you take the first two parts of Sweden and Denmark you get Sweden, the last two parts and you get Denmark. oooOOOooo
just-shower-thoughts:On this day (02/22/2019), in three years, it will be Tuesday, making 02/22/2022 the true 2sday
just-shower-thoughts:5G conspiracy theorists will be up to 30 times faster than 4G conspiracy theorists.
just-shower-thoughts: A lot of people can say they have a body like Thor’s now.
just-shower-thoughts: I hate those really vivid dreams that you’re still emotionally attached to after you wake up. You’re stuck, feeling for something that technically doesn’t exist.
just-shower-thoughts: Medusa’s OnlyFans could make men rock hard all over the world.
