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“England would fall if you left me.”

“It’s going to take more than three patches to cure my addiction to you.”

“You are really my area.”

“I would dress for you the way I dress going to Buckingham Palace.”

“I would make you scream my name even if we were in the Diogenes Club.”

“I’d go on a second date with you even if we got kidnapped by Chinese smugglers during our first.”

“Do I have any ideas of what I’d like to do to you? Eight, so far.” Submitted by absolutelyhetero.

“Sherlock says that I’m a spider. How’d you like to get tangled up in my web?”

“I’d like to snuggle under a blanket with you even if we weren’t in shock.”

“I think you’re neater than poisoned children.”

“I’d Stay Alive for you.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“Would you like to be wearing this jumper tomorrow morning?” Submitted by herbailiwick.

“I may be a blind banker, but I bet I can make you fall for me with two seconds of silence.”

“I would give you the good pill every time.”

“I can’t take my eyes off of you… No, really. I can’t. It’s for an experiment.”

“If I dress up as a museum security guard, will you let me inspect the work of art in your pants?”

“I’ll ‘scrub’ your 'floor’ if you’ll let me wear your deodorant.” Submitted by anonymous.

“The newspaper says that you’re a confirmed bachelor… Want me to fix that?”

“When I told you to take my card, I meant my V-card.”

“If you’re a hedgehog, can I be your hedge?”

“So, you’re a sniper? Just how good is your aim in bed?” Submitted by anonymous.

“You had me at ‘How fresh?’” Submitted by mykittyisbeautiful.

“Let me unwrap you like this mercury-laced candy.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“Will you be my live-in normal?”

“You had me at ‘Afghanistan or Iraq?’” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“I would ‘coordinate’ with you and a pair of handcuffs in a dark alley anytime.”

“Why do I need to know about the solar system? It’s wrong anyway; my world revolves around you.” Submitted by turtleplz.

“I may not be your brother’s handler, but I’ll do everything you tell me to.”

“Forget using Anthea– I’d much rather come abduct you myself.”

“I want to express my love for you in every possible variant available to the English language.”

“I would care if your life was at stake, even if it didn’t help save you.”

“Mrs. Hudson, are you trying to seduce me?”

“How do you feel about Hamish for a baby name?”

“I love you more than John Watson loves jumpers.” Submitted by rightinthefangirl.

“I would go ‘hey’ for you.” Submitted by atsometimemasters.

“You are more indispensable than my homeless network.”

“You may be on the side of the angels, but we’re gonna have one Hell of a night.” Submitted by thereisnoshameinbeingcrazy.

“Why should you choose me? Well, I am my own least irritating officer.”

“I’d like to fiddle with you when I’m thinking– and I’m not talking about playing the violin.” Inspired by this (source unknown).

“I want to grow old, retire, and study bees with you.”

“I’ll eat you out even though digestion slows me down.”

“Forget the lipstick-matching present– let’s unwrap you.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“I would wait a year and a half just to serenade you with my Bee Gees ringtone.”

“I would buy you a deerstalker even if the rest of Scotland Yard didn’t pitch in.”

“I bet I can keep you wetter than Soo Lin Yao’s teapots.”

“I would never chase some killer while trying to get off with you.”

“You’re more valuable to me than a nine million pound jade hairpin.”

“I’ve been lonely ever since you ensured my husband’s execution.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“I want to introduce you to my pussy– and I’m not talking about Toby.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“I would show off at your trial just to get locked in a cell with you.”

“You make me so stiff, Molly mistook me for one of her cadavers.”

“Do you want to see what else I could present for your pleasure?” Submitted by the-improbable-1.

“If you were my day to die, I could never get a better offer.”

“If Moriarty was about to murder you, I would give him a call.”

“Even if I was the St. Bart’s traffic cone, I wouldn’t tell you to slow down.”

“I don’t need a good coat and a short friend to look ‘tall,’ if you get what I mean.”

“I would pretend to be drunk just to go for a ride with you.”

“Mrs. Turner has married ones. How about you and I be Mrs. Hudson’s married ones?”

“Will you 221-be mine?”

“Whenever I’m apart from you, I’m bluer than my scarf.”

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