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the-mad-prince-of-denmark: dark-haired-hamlet: Pro tip: if an evangelical stranger approaches you asking to pray for you, there’s inevitably something about you that they see and want to change. [Ex: I attend a very conservative, very religious uni
anexperimentallife: just-tumbling-along: bloodnikki: theladyjanedoe: sleepbby: pro tip: before getting serious w a man, just casually mention ur period. like, just say ‘my cramps are bad rn’ or ‘I have to go buy some pads’. his reaction is
chlochloariadne: Getting a lot of messages recently from guys I went to high school and university with who totally ignored me then. Pro tip: ‘you’ve changed a lot, you’re hot now’ is not a compliment. ‘You’re way less weird, wanna
goldensweetcheeks: cummingsooon: goldensweetcheeks: princ383: just-swallow-me-woman: cummingsooon: sadisticwayz: cummingsooon: Pro Tip👀👂🏾👌🏾If you watch a man stroke his dick it’ll tell you all you need to know on how to suck it
themoonshoes: ampullae: Happy Thanksgiving and Happy Thursday to those who don’t celebrate it! Pro-tip: use inexpensive headcrab meat instead of turkey; no one will tell the difference! spoiler I actually didn’t see anything wrong with the turkey
theprotip: Pro tips here
teenssfromhell: pro tip: don’t be my friend or else i will become annoyingly clingy and emotionally attached to you and you can’t escape ever
liveforpetewentz: pro tip: don’t name your fish after band members because one time my dad called me to tell me gerard died and i started crying
goldenpoc: Pro tip: if someone is happy about something and wants to share it with you even though you have no interest in it, go along with it. There’s no need to put someone down about something they feel is cool. It’s just nice you know.
ex0skeletal: Pro Tip: Instead of having feelings, try being dead inside. Everything is still horrible but you will not care at all.
somegirlsstuff: Things That are the Same Color as My Hair. Pro tip : Get stoned and do this at Walgreens with a good friend. The employees love it so much, they follow you around.
str8pugginit: Pro tip ladies: Don’t forget to call your period “blowjob week” because god forbid your man has to suffer a whole 5 days of no sexual pleasure while you deal with debilitating cramps and shed your inner organs. joe should be lucky
stupidcumslut: Pro Tip: Sharing a slut is a great way to encourage male bonding. 8===D——{ Wetiquette
hotwfiesarahnjake: openmarriageadventures: rmplittleone: lucky-stag: Truth Open marriage pro tip: always place a high value on the primary relationships in your orbit - yours (obvi), and those of your partners. Everyone gets to play and stays
hotsabrinal: Pro tip: when you cover yourself, cover yourself.
mochiifeedii:Fat Girl Pro Tip: Dip your fast food in melted butter 🤤
heroin-temptation: ex0skeletal: Pro Tip: Instead of having feelings, try being dead inside. Everything is still horrible but you will not care at all. Completely accurate.
anundeadanarchist: Pro-Tip for the summer: wear whatever the fuck you want!
diffindo-my-panties: yourbadgrrl: suchpaige: please don’t assume that I want your dick because I reblog porn 😅 Tumblr pro tip! This!
lalalesbians: pro tip: some vaginas get very wet. Some don’t get very wet. Some vaginas let the wetness out, and some keep it inside. How wet you get and the amount of wetness that comes out is nothing to be ashamed of or self conscious about because
littlekittensplay-ground:Pro tip, tie a knot over your clit when you tie a harness then hump your pillow like the desperate baby you are. Youre welcome 💕
mitchstompedmytaco: pro tip: fill the piñata with absolutely nothing to prepare your kids for the letdowns of adulthood
mond0: pro tip: make your password “im gay” so even if someone knows it theyll never be able to get on your account unless they say that theyre gay
condommodel: pro tip: headphones keep falling out? tape them in! Cutie
manbootypokeball: Pro Tip: When someone asks if you’ve been tested for HIV don’t reply with “i’m clean.” Say you’re “HIV negative.” To say you’re “clean” implies that people living with HIV are “dirty.” Don’t feel ashamed
hplyrikz: Pro tips here
hugeintokyo: Pro tip: Before having her send the photo to her husband, it’s important to make sure you get her wedding ring in the shot for effect.
Life Pro Tip: use suction cups as your key chain so you won't lose your locker keys when you work out.
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gentlemanpigeon: pro tips on how to deal with a mugging here at tumblr.com
romancingyourwhore: R & R Pro Tip #69Make the tried-and-true missionary position a tour-de-force of exhilaration via faux asphyxiation.
romancingyourwhore: R & R Pro Tip #16 Kissing, licking, and biting her ass during foreplay will make her remember your name. Pulling her hair and pinning her wrist and rubbing your thumb on her ass during a vigorous pounding will make her forget
theeblackcuckold: whiteboy4bbconlygirls: Pro tip: a black man does it best. Take that nigger dick♠️TheeBlackCuckold.tumblr.com #theeblackcuckold #teamniggerworldorder #slutwifelover #queenofspades #teamwhitegirls ♠️♠️♠️♠️
captains-cuntboy: Pro tip for mean doms: Allow your sub to touch themself but set a time limit so you can watch them rubbing their parts desperately fast and rough, trying to get off in time. And afterwards you can either enjoy the pathetically releaved
:nintendhoeing:Pro tip: if you shove your fingers in my mouth while I’m talking there’s a 99% chance my brain will shut off and I’ll turn into a drooly little dollie before your very eyesPlease make my brain shut off 🥺🥺🥺
elf-slut:pro tip : store bananas in your underwear so you can eat them later
arabwife: pro tip: if u feel like u have to be a watered down or ‘less intense’ version of urself when interacting w/ someone - they do not deserve u.
britsfit: Pro tip
bahookies: me, around midnight lonely emotional wreck says things i’ll regret the next morning pro tip @myself: just go to sleep bitch
proneboned: Prone Bone Pro Tip Alpha Sectionals can be put to even better use after the cocktail party ends.
fuckyeahfriendlyfire: herasshistongue: dontignoretheballs: No. 1 Pro-Tip for improving your hand job technique: Shove your tongue up his asshole. What he said. No greater truth hath been spoken. ☝️
proneboned: Prone Bone Pro Tip #14 See Exhibits A & B for improper vs. proper prone bone technique
romancingyourwhore: R & R Pro Tip #71 If she’s gracious enough to get under the table for you, toss her on top once she’s through, and treat her to a fine dining experience that begins and ends with a warm and sweet and oh so creamy dessert.
escapetheheat: Pro Tip: Don’t tell depressed people how good they have it in comparison to others. They already know and already feel guilty about it. You’re making the problem worse.
just4ourpleasure: romancingyourwhore: R & R Pro Tip #14 Press yourself against her while you grind your cock deep inside her. Hold her close. Breathe softly in her ear. Whisper naughty things. Remind her she’s your dirty little girl while
oh HEYit’s 3.44 AM, been awake since 7.30 AMworked from 8AM up to 2AMAnd tomrrow I’ll start at 9AM aka less that 5 hour of sleeplife pro-tip guys!!!!-> Don’t do my fucking job, go and become an employee or something
Life pro-tips:
