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“If I deduced everything in your life from your alcoholic sibling to your military service, would you come home with me? Forever?” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“You can see any body in this morgue. Especially mine!” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“I’d fight a thousand mermaids just to be by your side.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras. Credit to geothebio for the doodle.
“I don’t know anything about the stars unless they’re the ones in your eyes.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“I got the milk.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“Come with me and I’ll make sure the Hound isn’t the only thing howling.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“Just give me a chance and I’ll be Reichen your bed Bach and forth all night.” Submitted by turtleplz.
“You don’t need one of those cats to get lucky tonight.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras. Based on a suggestion by deeppuddles.
“Even if you were a serial killer, I’d ride in your cab.” Submitted by crimescenegiggle.
“Be the Mrs. Hudson to my skull. By which I mean I want you to take me.” Submitted by deeppuddles.
“Let’s get under this blanket and give everyone a shock.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“What are you doing? Get back into the cage I made for you!” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“How about I smear myself with jam when we get home and let you lick it off?” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“I love you more than Mycroft loves cake.” Submitted by moikaywayspetunicorn.
“I would fake kill myself for your sake.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“You’re going to need a shock blanket when I’m finished with you.” Submitted (with photo) by i-am-s-h-e-r-l-o-c-k-e-d.
“I.O.U. a threesome.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“Playing games with you makes my brain explode. In a good way.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“Sherly– you’re my division.” Submitted by somepeaceplease.
“If you take off that bedsheet, I’ll show you my battle dress.” Submitted by bumpershoot.
“I have a special room in my mind palace just for you.” Requested by one of my real-life friends, who doesn’t have a Tumblr.
“I’m married to my work, but I’d divorce it for you.” Submitted by imadeyousomeshoes.
“I want to put my ‘experiment’ in your 'microwave.’” Submitted by imadeyousomeshoes.
“I always hear ‘kiss me on the mouth’ when you’re speaking, but it’s usually subtext.” Submitted by imadeyousomeshoes.
“You’re the king of my mind palace.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“I’m married to my work, so we’ll have to be discreet.” Requested by one of my real-life friends, who doesn’t have a Tumblr.
“I always hear ‘sit on my face’ when you’re speaking, but it’s usually subtext.” Submitted by verity-burns.
“You make my saliva coagulate.” Submitted by soiguessimhangingherenow.
“I wouldn’t put on pants for you.” Submitted by britishrandominsanity.
“I’d put my riding crop in your mortuary, if you catch my drift.” Submitted by andyouwere-barelyholdingon.
“I don’t consult you just because I’m desperate.”
“Let me be your Action Man. Your brother won’t be able to break me.”
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“My mustache isn’t the only thing I’d shave for you.” Submitted by Courtney (no username).
“Is your meat dagger on Twitter? Because I’d like to get that on text alert.”
“I fell for you harder than Rupert Graves in the gag reel.”
“Are you a sitty thing? Because I would love to sit on you.” Submitted by snickersa2010.
“I would date a sociopath just to make you wonder if it was serious.”
“I would love you even if you stabbed my hand with a fork.”
“You don’t need to pay £2,995 to be my V.I.P.”
“If you meet me on the roof, a gun won’t be the only thing I put in my mouth.”
“I want you to ‘meat’ my ‘dagger.’“
“I would smile at you on a bus even if you didn’t have a daisy behind your ear.â€
“I have a problem… and there is only one way that I can solve it… I need to kiss someone.â€
“If you came to my house in the middle of the night, my umbrella sword isn’t the only thing I’d be whipping out.”
“Are you the well that Victor Trevor died in? Because I’m about to go deep inside you and feel how wet you are.”
“I could never forget you, even if my dad gave me TD12.”
“If you were credit, I would take you even after John published his blog.”
“I would let you give me a hug even if I didn’t need to send and delete a text on your phone.”
“We’re not like the gravestones at Musgrave Hall. Our dates will never be wrong.”
“I hope nobody needs to say ‘Norbury’ to me when I ask you out.”
“I usually make clients sit in The Chair, but you can sit on my face if you’d prefer.”
“Are you the R in A.G.R.A.? Because you’re the rose of my world.”
“Mycroft is right about the list of people who love me not being long, but you’re the only one I need on it anyway.”
“I would let you look in my ‘lymph nodes’ even if I wasn’t missing my limbs.”
“My love for you is so strong, not even Sherrinford could contain it.”
“Forget the Thatcher busts. The only bust I’m interested in is yours.”
“Your ass is like Rosie’s rattle: If you keep throwing it in my face, I’ll keep grabbing it.”
“The Borgia Pearl is too boring for me, but I’d love to make you my Borgia girl.”
“The ‘sixteen by six’ in Eurus’s song is actually referring to the length and circumference of my penis.”
