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“I love you so much, I promise to avoid your nose and teeth whenever I punch your face.”

“Wanna change Moriarty’s nickname for you?” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“I’ll help you excrete the drug out of your system.” Submitted by maskedcity.

“I know a man… And I am what he likes.” Submitted by Raj (no username).

“Even if there weren’t snipers aiming at you, I’d still fall for you.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“Even if I was allergic to kittens, I would still cuddle you.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“When I said I was hoping you’d go deeper, I wasn’t talking about your analysis.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“Would you like me to alarm you?” Submitted by anonymous.

“There’s no charge to ride me.” Based on a suggestion by tophatsandfedoras, who wanted cab-driving Moriarty.

“When I say ‘Vatican Cameos!’ I want you to go down… on me.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“I would rather have you than the skull.” Submitted by anonymous.

“I would have you right here even if you didn’t beg for mercy.” Submitted by anonymous.

“Do I have any ideas of what I’d like to do to you? Eight, so far.” Submitted by absolutelyhetero.

“Lestrade’s out of town today, but I’m willing to be your detective inspector.” Submitted (with photo) by epicnessisfoundwithin.

“Beg for mercy twice? …Please, I won’t stop there.” Submitted by j-abberwocky.

“You had me at ‘How fresh?’” Submitted by mykittyisbeautiful.

“Let me unwrap you like this mercury-laced candy.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“I like the turn-ups on your jeans. Wanna be my boy’s father?”

“You had me at ‘Afghanistan or Iraq?’” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“Why do I need to know about the solar system? It’s wrong anyway; my world revolves around you.” Submitted by turtleplz.

“I love you more than John Watson loves jumpers.” Submitted by rightinthefangirl.

“When people call me a freak, they mean in bed.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“You may be on the side of the angels, but we’re gonna have one Hell of a night.” Submitted by thereisnoshameinbeingcrazy.

“Are you holding my heart at gunpoint? Because I think I’m falling for you.” Submitted by anonymous.

“Forget the lipstick-matching present– let’s unwrap you.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“I hope Mycroft never gets off your sheet.” Inspired by this (submitted by sherlockian4life13).

“I’ve been lonely ever since you ensured my husband’s execution.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“Don’t you want me on the floor too? And on the bed, and on the couch, and on the table, and against the wall…” Submitted by anonymous.

“I’d say I love you, but then I’d have to kill you.” Submitted by the-improbable-1.

“Dear Jim, I’m in love with you. Won’t you fix it for me?” Submitted by anonymous.

“Since you blew your nose on the lady from the train’s number, would you like mine instead?” Submitted by anonymous.

“Even if I knew nothing about you, I would flat share with you.” Submitted by anonymous.

“Mrs. Turner has married ones. How about you and I be Mrs. Hudson’s married ones?”

“Well, I do believe that my pupils have dilated!” Submitted by crows-flight.

“Forget my sociopathy; you should do your research on my high-functioning penis.”

“I’d love to have a look around your top-secret areas.” Submitted (with photo) by cumberbitchsandwich.

“It would be the end of the world to me if your landlady were to cockblock us.”

“Excuse me, but I couldn’t help but notice the state of your knees…” Submitted by absolutelyhetero.

“I knew it was dangerous getting you into crap telly. I should get you into my bed instead.”

“Boys, please, not here. Let’s take it to my bedroom.” Submitted (with photo) by somenerdygirl.

“I love you more than John loves jam.” Submitted by xhowisharveywallbangeronewordx.

“Cerise isn’t the only thing that will drain you. You should see my purple shirt.” Submitted by Emily (no username).

“I would read your blog even if it only contained two hundred and forty-three types of tobacco ash.”

“Science of Deduction? Wouldn’t you rather hear about the Science of Seduction?” Submitted by thesaphiragirl.

“Forget tobacco ash. I’d rather blog two hundred and forty-three reasons why I love you.”

“The Sign of 3? I prefer the Sign of <3”

“I’d let you ride my tube with your harpoon.” Submitted (with photo) by Carrie (no username). (Admin’s note: Yes, I realize this screencap has been used before, but it was a photo submission, so I just rolled with it.)

“Forget faking my geniusâ€¦ Want to see a different sort of magic trick?” Based on a suggestion by anonymous.

“You don’t have to say ‘Vatican Cameos’ to get me to go down.” Submitted by Courtney (no username).

“I know Richard Brook was a lie, but I’d like to see you in handcuffs anyway.”

“I would murder a blackmailing newspaper proprietor for you.” Based on a suggestion by madspades.

“Whip me like one of your dead girls.” Submitted by madspades.

“I would kick my parents out if you came over.”

“My love for you isn’t like Lord Moran’s bomb– it doesn’t have an off switch.”

“I always hear ‘suck my face’ when you’re speaking, but it’s usually subtext.” Submitted by Courtney (no username).

“I cannot eliminate being with you, therefore it must not be impossible.”

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