sherlock holmes
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“I would go ‘hey’ for you.” Submitted by atsometimemasters.
“I want to grow old, retire, and study bees with you.”
“You’re a great man, and I think one day, if I get lucky with you, you might even be a good one.”
“I may not be The Golem, but I bet I can squeeze the life out of you, if you get what I mean.”
“Dear Jim, I’m in love with you. Won’t you fix it for me?” Submitted by anonymous.
“I wish Mike Stamford would introduce us.”
“I would pretend to be drunk just to go for a ride with you.”
“Will you 221-be mine?”
“I just met you, and this is crazy, but I know everything about you, so come live with me maybe?” Submitted by anonymous.
“Our babies would be sexy in both senses of the word.” Submitted by gloveonafoot.
“I enjoy my jumper collection, but I’d much rather have you on my body instead.”
“I like your purple shirt. How’d you like to see my red pants?” (Thank you so much to andrisbiedrins for sending the screencap. I couldn’t find any images of Martin Freeman wearing red bottoms except as Arthur Dent, and apparently
“Do you like Mexican food? Because I’ll gladly offer you a taste of my fiesta dick.”
“Mrs. Hudson may have stolen my skull, but you have stolen my heart.”
“You make me so happy, I spray painted a smiley face on our wall.”
“Would you still love me even if I turned into an Asian woman?”
“I’d let you investigate more than just my crime scenes, if you deduce my meaning.”
“When I said I would hit that, I didn’t just mean with my riding crop.”
“I would keep your mobile phone.”
“Shall I prevent you from being able to deduce me?”
“You give me a 221boner.”
“You are the grape of my eye. Apples are boring.” Submitted by bandofbaskets.
“How about we both skip your birthday dinner so I can show you my ‘thing’?”
“I’m no Herr Trepoff; the only thing I’m guilty of is loving you.”
“I don’t need an essay about all my friends hating me to know that you love me the most.”
“You’re such a hot Guy, I would steal a motorcycle to get to you.”
“I like you more than Howard Shilcott likes trains.”
“Your perfection has left me completely deaded.”
“I’ll let you kiss me if you crash through a window and ruffle your hair first.”
“Loving you could never be human error.”
“Can our sign be the sign of threesome?”
“I heard you lost your job fantasizing about me coming back to life… Don’t worry, I’ve got a different kind of ‘job’ you can do.”
“My detective skills aren’t the only gifts I was born with.”
“My jumpers aren’t the only thing about me with depth and complexity.”
“You’re my popular choice at the moment, dear.”
“Can I buy you a drink? 443.7 milliliters of drink, that is.”
“The ‘elephant in the room’ is my penis.”
“Without you, my heart feels hollower than Jack Griffin’s suit.”
“I don’t care how you fell in love with me… I want to know why.”
“You don’t need your mind palace to know my porn preference.”
“I’m a high-functioning sociopath… Can I be a high-functioning sociopath with your number?”
“Call me Shezza, because I’m going undercover… Under your covers, that is.”
“I’d let you make me wear the hat.”
“I want to do you on the table… On the Periodic Table hanging in your bedroom, that is.”
“I was so scared of you leaving me that I started doing napkin origami.”
“If I was Madonna, would you let me touch your knee?”
“I’d like to get to know you as well as I know ash.”
“You make me uncomprehending in the face of myself.”
“You taste better than eyeball coffee.”
“You don’t need to use your mind palace to see me in a straight jacket.”
“Let’s go bar hopping for a couple hours and then cuddle on the stairs.”
“Are you 051113? Because you just blew me away.”
“Let’s be Oklahomos together.” (If you haven’t seen it yet…)
“The lack of a ring when you slapped me isn’t the only reason I’m glad your engagement’s over.”
“Forget the limits– let’s all three dance.”
“I’d like to corrupt your ‘magnetic strip.’”
“Forget solving crimes– I could use you as an alternative to getting high.”
“Call me the Clarence House Cannibal, because I’d like a taste of you.”
“Are you Cupid? Because you just shot me in the heart.” Submitted by scripturientjester.
“I’d keep your chair even if it was blocking my view to the kitchen.”
