sherlock holmes
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“I would show off at your trial just to get locked in a cell with you.”
“Face the other way. You’re getting me off.”
“You make me so stiff, Molly mistook me for one of her cadavers.”
“I like my partners the way I like my wall decorations: Music-loving and horny.”
“Wanna see what’s Under my Shaw?” Seriously though, save Undershaw!
“Don’t you want me on the floor too? And on the bed, and on the couch, and on the table, and against the wall…” Submitted by anonymous.
“I’d say I love you, but then I’d have to kill you.” Submitted by the-improbable-1.
“Since you blew your nose on the lady from the train’s number, would you like mine instead?” Submitted by anonymous.
“Even if I knew nothing about you, I would flat share with you.” Submitted by anonymous.
“Even if I was the St. Bart’s traffic cone, I wouldn’t tell you to slow down.”
“I don’t need a good coat and a short friend to look ‘tall,’ if you get what I mean.”
“Mrs. Turner has married ones. How about you and I be Mrs. Hudson’s married ones?”
“You can ride me if you want. I even come with a riding crop!”
“You make me so giddy, I’m giggling even at crime scenes.”
“Well, I do believe that my pupils have dilated!” Submitted by crows-flight.
“Forget my sociopathy; you should do your research on my high-functioning penis.”
“If you were my drug, a seven percent solution wouldn’t be enough.”
“If I had a silly-looking jumper for every time I thought of you, I’d be John Watson.”
“I’d love to have a look around your top-secret areas.” Submitted (with photo) by cumberbitchsandwich.
“Forget dead pigs– want to see what I can penetrate with my other harpoon?”
“I would come to your flat even if I was on the other side of town and it could be dangerous.”
“The fridge? Please, I know a better place for you to put your fingers.”
“When I’m retired and studying bees, will you be my honey?”
“Sometimes you don’t talk for days on end? That’s fine. I can give you something else to do with your mouth.”
“It would be the end of the world to me if your landlady were to cockblock us.”
“You’ve never been the most luminous of people, but you brighten up my world.” Submitted by anonymous.
“If you give me your heart, I promise I won’t put it in the fridge.”
“I’d love to get under your sheets. Especially if you were still wearing them.”
“Excuse me, but I couldn’t help but notice the state of your knees…” Submitted by absolutelyhetero.
“I knew it was dangerous getting you into crap telly. I should get you into my bed instead.”
“I couldn’t keep my eyes off of you, so I had to put them in the microwave.”
“If your flatmate punched you in the face, I would kiss it better.”
“I named our dog Gladstone because you make me happy and hard.”
“I love you more than John loves jam.” Submitted by xhowisharveywallbangeronewordx.
“Shake hands with you in Hell? I’d much rather shake something else of yours.”
“I noticed you’re wearing a deerstalker. May I be your dear?”
“So, you like letting freaks into your crime scenes… How about letting a freak into your bed?”
“Cerise isn’t the only thing that will drain you. You should see my purple shirt.” Submitted by Emily (no username).
“Will you be the Sher-key to my Sher-lock?”
“I’d let Angelo put a candle on our table.”
“No matter what, your disguise is always a self-portrait. No wonder you look sexy in anything.”
“I would disguise myself as a wounded vicar just to get invited into your home.”
“You don’t have to be a murder victim’s stillborn daughter to get me to shout your name over and over again.”
“I would read your blog even if it only contained two hundred and forty-three types of tobacco ash.”
“Instead of jumping off of Bart’s, how about jumping into my bed?”
“When I tried to deduce you, the floating text turned into erotica.”
“Science of Deduction? Wouldn’t you rather hear about the Science of Seduction?” Submitted by thesaphiragirl.
“You steeple your fingers a lot. I could give you something better to do with them.”
“If you broke into my flat for a tea party, I would let you sit in my chair.”
“On my face. Come at once, if convenient. If inconvenient, come anyway.”
“I would ensure your husband’s death in Florida just to be with you.”
“I may not be strictly speaking on the drugs squad, but I’m very keen… on you.”
“Forget tobacco ash. I’d rather blog two hundred and forty-three reasons why I love you.”
“The Sign of 3? I prefer the Sign of <3”
“I’d let you ride my tube with your harpoon.” Submitted (with photo) by Carrie (no username). (Admin’s note: Yes, I realize this screencap has been used before, but it was a photo submission, so I just rolled with it.)
Happy Halloween, followers! I made this blog’s very first pick-up line comic for you! :) And yes, that is Harry Potter font.
“Without you, my heart feels as empty as my hearse.”
“I’d smile and wink at you even if it didn’t humanize me.”
“Don’t worry, I’m no London ambulance. I take longer than eight minutes to come.”
“The shooting last week isn’t the only reason you may have to restart my heart.”