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I don’t have a lot of friends because I look at groups of friends and just don’t see an opening for myself. I feel like life is one of those impossibles puzzles and I’m one of the 5 extra pieces that don’t fit anywhere and just
So last week I dropped a 20lb dumbbell on my knee. Its a little swollen and bruised and it still hurts a bit :(
I have had constant back pain for years now, and recently its been getting worse again. I wonder if its my punishment or something, so I’m almost glad I’m in pain.
I’m not doing well. I’m going to go before I embarrass myself again and make people worry.
Im at work and having a good day for a change! !! Got some stuff ready for approveal so thats good°!!!
Time to head to work. Kinda neutral so that’s good I guess.
Again good day at work so far!!!
I wish it were socially acceptable to walk around in public doing everyday errands and stuff while dressed like Ash Ketchum.
Like really, because it makes me feel calmer when I put it on. Thats why I wear it to bed and around the house all the time, It makes me feel more secure. When I take it off, its almost like a little bit of anxiety pops up, but not really enough to really
I would be out doing errands and suddenly finally understand what was wrong with my uncles car 21 years ago.
There was a person that was sending a package today that was incredibly rude on the phone to 2 different people, calling one of them an idiot, and hanging up on and calling back twice and complaining about forms that he didn’t fill out correctly
Forcing someone that is hospitalized to leave their room to “socialize” when they are uncomfortable and unhappy being around people then dragging them kicking and screaming down the hall when they hide under one of the couches and lock them
Or ok I guess not now.
I have to leave for work in 20 minutes and I haven’t even gotten out of bed yet. I just want to stay in bed dressed like Ash Ketchum all day. I hate how vulnerable I feel when I put the jacket away for the day before work :( Oh well, time to get
Not having a good day. Completely exhausted :(
Im so angry my he as d hurts and I can barely se ed or walkj
Hiding un the bathroom at wirk. Mild anxiety attac I k. Can’t speak words. Ca
Had anxiety attack at work. Calming a own going to go home
Think im ok to drive. Going to blast 2ba amaster and be careful
Home. Been here a a little bit. I feel really dumb for posting that but it was all I could think to do.
What I really want right now are the nastiest anon messages that anyone could ever send. all I want is for people to say mean things to me.
don’t ask for nice things you piece of shit. you know that they’ll just make you feel worse.
The words “sometimes your best isn’t good enough” have been rattling around in my head for about a month and a half now, and I know now nothing I’ve accomplished has any merit because I am not deserving of anything positive, even
this is why I’ve been staying the fuck away. because Im just a stupid negative piece of shit, and probably will only get worse all the way though to christmas.
All I want is to be included in stuff, but whenever someone asks me if I want to do something my answer is almost always no (mostly because its so hard to get ready with so little notice unless I’m asking someone else), so people don’t ever
I don’t even reblog giveaway posts and stuff because even if I won, I still feel like theres someone else more deserving of winning something, and just being in the string and adding that one extra note is enough to throw off the person that was
Wake up early with moderate energy 1 1/2 hours early. Be productive? No, think about what a piece of shit you are and wrap yourself in blankets and cry into ash ketchum pillows until its time to get up.
Ugh now im geting sensitive and a litle emotional again.
Its great when you remember something seemingly harmless abut say a program you used to be in, but then the fun really starts when you remember how you were treated there.
I hate the holidays. I don’t like to celebrate anything really. What I hate is having to be social when I’d rather be in bed. I hate things like July 4th and new years because no one cares enough to invite me to things beforehand and when
I’m the person that everyone is uncomfortable around so they avoid me. Hell, sometimes I want to say something nice but I don’t because no matter what I have to say is automatically invalidated because it came from me, and sometimes it seems
Im doing a load of laundry with my new stuff in it and cooking dinner then show er ring and then relaxing a bit before passing out. A sober 853 is a very unhappy 853. I’m happiest when I’m numb. Like right now.
Had a good night!! Watched Bleach and played perfect dark then watched the pilot of Macgyver tonight with my best friend!!!
I love how I’m the person that makes everyone nervous. The person thats so nervous around people that everyone also gets nervous and therefore avoids me. the person that no one wants to talk to for more than 30 seconds. The person that has nothing
So uh, I stapled my finger. Oops.
So on top of stapling my finger, the spring let go while I was trying to unjam it and launched an entire stick of staples towards my coworkers. All I could say about it was “stapler malfunction” while they glared at me disapprovingly.
therosebell: bronzebasilisk: hyperscraps: vashito: I don’t have chronic pain but this artwork is so nice to look at *^* Just because we’re not writhing on the floor doesn’t mean we’re not hurting. We’ve just gotten really good at hiding
So, I uh looked at pictures of needles and injections trying to look something up and I kinda triggered myself because I’m fucking stupid and now I cant stop thinking about some stuff.
I hate hospitals sooo much.
pyroluminescence: There are still people who don’t think Red and Green are gay as fuck and this concerns me deeply
my forearms are numb.
I’m glad I’m numb. I like how enough alcohol makes me almost not care.
I don’t like getting credit for doing things I do because it makes me uncomfortable. I just want to do things and not be seen or known of.
I feel like shit today. I also havent been productive at work because I’ve been spending so much time hiding in the bathroom. No one would notice any difference in workload if I didn’t go in, and then they would realize how incompetent and
Its my own damn fauld I almost flipped the fuck out
I’m so fucking pathetic. I hate having to exist for so many hours a day.
Its almost like people that follow me dont realize that I;m a creepy 26 year old that has an unhealthy obsession with Ash Ketchum and that I literally look like the bad guy from Men in Black 3.
I was doing my errands, and I decided to try slowing down and relaxing and it just made things worse :(
so a coworker asked me something today and then I answered it and they responded with “talking to you is so depressing”.
So tired and my back is really hurting bad. I’m supposed to be leaving for work in 10 minutes and I haven’t made it downstairs yet.
Dispite the back pain its an ok day so far! !!
I had an ok day but my back pain has been terrible. I’m starting to go downhill so I’m going to bed. A 6 day work week is stressful. I am so tired. yet I don’t seem to be sleeping well. Nothing is really comforting.
So I went to work today dressed like Ash Ketchum, minus the gloves and the hat. The best part was the people I was working with had absolutely no idea, and no one said anything except for the one person I told and even they didn’t recognize it
I’m a pice of shit because I just realized that I've been blowing my best friend off for at least the last two weeks or more. He lives two houses away. Even though I’ve been working 6 day weeks and have been in no shape for any sort of human
When I see myself in the mirror with my Ash Ketchum Jacket on, its kinda calming. Almost the same thing happens when I look down and see it.
Whenever I see those positive posts, I see them as for everyone except me.
I’m lying in bed dressed like ash ketchum with ash ketchum sheets and a pokemon blanket and an ash ketchum plush and I’m 26 years old. Cant get much more pathetic than that.
I hate that I look at thinks too logically. I then get irrationally angry with myself even though I know just because I’m physically capable of doing something doesn’t mean I’m mentally capable of doing it safely.
I wish that someone couldjust tell me what to do for a ewhile in person. Maybe even show me how to do something new or something. Kinda almost wanting a some sort of supervision or directions on what I need to do and stuff.
Can you get high off of large amouts of spicy food? Lets find out!!! My face and whole upper boddy are buzzing!!!!
