markers
NSFW Tumblr
find markers on porn pin board
markers clips
Its been nice to feel happines and hopefulness for an change instead of sadness,anger, and hopelessness.
I’m wide awake and I need to get rest for work tomorrow because I start full time for the holidays and I have to go in for early afternoon not the evening like normal and still work all the way thorough. Not sure what I’ll be working on but
Time for work :( geez this early to be going in for me.
The past week has been exhausting and my back pain has been terrible. It keeps locking up and spasming :(
Can I just remove my entire spine? And maybe that chunk of muscle in my mid back that keeps spasming. ugh.
Aside from the terrible back pain I’ve been having (much worse than usual) I guess I’m doing ok.I played with my gas powered RC truck and I cleaned my room and washed all my laundry so despite the fact that it feels like my back has like
I don’t usually talk about my aches and pains but everything hurts soo bad right now. My back is destroyed, my rib is aching, and my legs feel like someone is sawing them off.
12 hours from now I will be at work. Last year I had ridiculous hours that messed up my sleep schedule that I still haven’t recovered from. This year the hours are not so crazy but the workload is. It has completely ruined any chances of ever
I will never amount to anything useful. I’m well past the chance of that happening.
Wow, now I’m just worrying about my friend. I know it was just a dream, but still. Maybe I should just get dressed for work and just go back to sleep and not get up until I have to leave for work. But that would involve getting out of bed to begin
That was a nice 9.5 hour shift :(
I’ve been thinking about a random person from elementary school in a program I was in and how everyone, including the teacher would call him names. He wasn’t a mean person, but his last name was very similar to the word “libel”
I’m fgreaking out because I have to drive to work in my monms car because my car has a small issue thats not a problem and she made and apoinmtment to fix it and didn’t tell me and m\noew I have to drive a car I’, msacered to driva
I had a shitty anxiety and stress filled day. Tomorrow is not looking good either. The only confirmed thing I’m looking forward to is Pokemon XY on Saturday. I’m just going to wrap myself in blankets and try not to exist for a while and hope
Losing your Pokemon is the saddest thing ever. I’m crying over my first Pikachu’s death. Time to try to not exist for a while.
I lost a follower lost night. People sometimes come and go but I’m a little sad because it was one of my first followers, and I have no idea why they would suddenly unfollow. I mean we never talked but they would like my posts and stuff. I thought
I got unfollowed by one of my first followers last night around this time and I’m still kinda sad and wondering what I did that made them leave but it obviously was enough to make them leave and as messed up as it sounds I kinda feel like I lost
IDK I just feel like I’m absolute scum and that I probably did something really wrong at this point but I don’t know what it was and I don’t feel comfortable asking. I wonder if I should unfollow them just in case they don’t like
I don’t want to be an adult today. Can I go back to kindergarten and have story time and do finger paintings and have recess and play on the playground and color in coloring books and have naptime?
I kinda like posting at this time of day because no ones around and no one will scroll their dash back this far later at night and see my stupidness.
C'mon brain, I do not wish to recall this specific set of memories right now.
I like how my current top post is about how no one is on during a certain time of day and that no one would scroll back that far on their dash or see those posts.
Hell, the fact that that post even has notes to begin with shows what a failure I am.
It fucking sucks that this started with me thinking about how my rib hadn’t been hurting for a while and then I started thinking about how I got the injury in the first place and now I’m having trouble not thinking about it and its starting
I hate how when I get upset I get really uncomfortable being around people online. I mean they don’t even necessarily have to actually be active, its literally the list of names/usernames that upsets me, and its like everyone is just watching me
*rolls over in bed and wraps self in blankets*
I finally have some time to relax a bit and unwind from stress at work. I am taking a week of vacation next week and I’m hoping that a week away will help me not think of myself as an absolute failure. Its kind of a shame because I was almost happy
My two biggest talents are annoying the hell out of people and upsetting them.
I suddenly remembered the lump on the back of my head. Its been there for like 2 weeks now and its swollen and throbbing right now.
Ok, time to hide in bed. I’m suddenly thinking of doing something stupid and its been quite some time since I thought of doing that.
HONESTLY: REBLOG THIS IF YOU HAVE EVER SELF HARMED IN ANY WAY, SKIPPED A MEAL ON PURPOSE, BEEN DEPRESSED, FELT ALONE IN A CROWDED ROOM, HATED YOUR BODY, HATED YOURSELF, FELT LIKE YOUR NOT GOOD ENOUGH OR BEEN TOLD YOU WERENT, CRIED YOURSELF TO SLEEP, FELT
That was second from the bottom in my drafts. Its been there since I first started!!
I feel like Ive crashed after boosting on Redbull/NOS for a week and I haven’t had any energy drinks since like Wednesday and It feels like I’ve been chasing the dragon and stopped sudden;y and everything is kinda floaty and spacey and I think
I’ve been doing a lot of “hand flapping” again lately, like over the past 3 weeks or so? Its kinda weird that it would start up again after not really having any twitches other than pumping my legs or rocking back and forth.
Its nice when you find people that are fun to talk with
Long drives are really stressful and draining for me but worth it to see good friends.
well, tomorrow its back to “reality” I guess. The last week went by like a blur but it slowed down at the two points that really mattered when I was visiting friends. My mom was happy to see me “more relaxed and less stressed”
I’m upset that I have 3 months of being a failure ahead of me. I’m glad that I’m buzzed and a little numb and that I only mildly hate myself.
*smashes head on keyboard* mnj b vbb nbb nmnmmmmmm, nm n nm nmjnmj
ash will keep me safe
Sleep isn’t fucking working
I’m not a good person, but I’m not posting the writeup I just did of the worst thing I’ve ever done nor am I going to tell anyone. I guess I get to keep my friends/followers (provided you all want to stay I guess) a while longer as
Sometimes I think my entire existence has a negative impact on the world as a whole and that when bad things happen (seemingly) out of my control or to other people they’re my fault and I can even explain a compelling argument to people on why
I’m seriously thinking its my job thats making me hate myself so much, and haha guess where I’m heading out to in 10 minutes?
*grabs the hilt of a Honedge while playing with the ears of an espurr*
I’m numb except for my fingers. I’m disgusting. I should go away and not bother people because I’m garbage.
I hate myself and I hate thatr Im too drunk to hide
I’m jkinda vpissed that litwik daragged me out. titsd going to suck my soul out but it sucks that its going to hurt
I suck. the onk\ly dram I can think of is one wher Im hniding from stuff and \ thrying tto control my drams ans theres this old boarded uop buoilding and I wand to fix it but i keep draming about it and I kinda have it fixed uu\p but I;m not there yet
im drunk ad my monm saud somnethign avbout leftovercam\ndy and stuf and IDkdsnfkljgbdsfg/dflfdnfd
and I saw some of Alf amd I just hat evertyone thjat is being mean to aAlf and its just ateerrible 80s stero\type and just sd;hsdfpjfdhdfj;
So It looks like I got drunk last night and posted a ton of personal shit publicly that I never wanted anyone to know and should never have been seen by people. I tend to save stuff as drafts and transfer it out later but it looks like I just started
It seems like I’m always at my calmest the day after I flip out over something.
When I was at the bar for the party someone yelled out ASH KETCHUM!!! and pointed at me and I didn’t know what to do so I kinda grabbed my hat and threw more of a Red type pose Then he asked about Pikachu and I took out a Pokeball and said that
Ugh, its that time of the night when I suddenly feel worthless.
I keep having issues with hand flapping :(
I’ve been a bit anxious on and off all day. I’ve also put off doing stuff because I’ve just wanted to avoid my parents as much as possible and I just wish they would go on vacation again for a weekend so I caould relax again
I hate it so much when time slows down and everything sucks
Theres a driver at work that a really nice guy but presents a little “effeminately” and was wearing those “barefoot” shoes and really short “daisy duke” bike shorts and people were going on about how “offensive
I hate how I can get so anxious that I think people are watchinging me when I’m online and not even posting stuff and then I have to leave.
