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incestuous-creampie: When my dad took my anal virginity, I was nervous at first, but once he got inside me, it was like a revelation. It was like there was an emptiness inside me I had never noticed before and it was filled perfectly with daddy cock.
So like, Opal’s bow was like, Amethyst’s whip and Pearl’s staff, like combined. And Sugilite’s, like, flail was like, mad of Amethyst’s whip and like, Garnet’s gauntlets. So like, it makes sense that like, Malachite would have a combination
I was such a creep on the late bus today omfg I was sitting across from this gorgeous guy and he had his eyes closed and his earphones in and he looked like he was sleeping and the sun was shining on him from the window so his hair and skin was like
bannableoffense: lizzidoll: hypnosiskinks: wrigglesandgiggles: ditzy-dolls: Being brainless feels so good. Martha was trying to stand up, she really was. It was like she was asleep, though. Like she was floating outside of her body. Being brainless
This fight (and by extension, this arc) was such bullshit. Like, going by the terms of the fight, Shishio may not have accomplished his goal, but he was undoubtedly in the right. But on the other side of the coin, the deck was so stacked in his favour,
wow-confessions: I really do love Pandaren, I was a huge Wrath fan forever but, when Pandaria came out and I met Lorewalker Cho, I felt like I was in a whole new story. Everything we had done had led up to stuff already done before, but, Pandaria was
martymikalski: remember when aang was on trial for a murder kyoshi was accused of and he was like OMG NONE OF MY PAST LIVES WOULD EVER KILL ANYONE WAH WAH WAH and then kyoshi appeared and was like YEAH I KILLED HIM W/E HE WAS A DOUCHE
thechamberofsecrets: i remember when i was like 14 my friend was spending the night and she told me she had to go pee and i was like ok and she was taking forever so i went to check on her and she was taking nudes in my bathroom
hypnosiskinks: wrigglesandgiggles: ditzy-dolls: Being brainless feels so good. Martha was trying to stand up, she really was. It was like she was asleep, though. Like she was floating outside of her body. Being brainless feels so good. She reached
there was a cat “fight” at school haha it was super funny because it was during lunch and then i was in the classroom like always and then i walked over to the window and i was like why is there a crowd. then everyone else started crowding
scumfuckus: scumfuckus: apparently when i was born the…guy after the midwife? the baby doctor? was this russian guy with HUGE hands who just sorta. squeezed my head (my dad says he was worried that he was gonna crush me like a coke can) and was like
realphilosophytube: there was a guy in my drama school who was a former Olympic gymnast and he was insanely ripped and could do shit like backflip and the splits no problem, and one day he was walking around on his hands and i was like, “damn i wish
roughrimjob: I burned like ¾ of my forearm on the oven while I was making chicken and my mom was like “honey put some butter on it it draws the heat out” so she was rubbing a stick of butter on my arm and my stepdad was like “what’s for
burgrs: in 9th grade i was getting picked on in class and this girl was like “fuck you guys leave him alone” and called me over to her seat and I was like “thx lol” and she was like “I have something special to show you don’t tell the teacher”
3-2-1queer: When I was in fifth grade I realized I liked girls but I was like “that’s a problem for another day” and literally forgot about it and then in like eleventh grade I was like “oh my god”
procoffee: One time I was out shopping with my mom and I started playing with a display thing, and she was like “What are you doing?” and I sarcastically was like “Worshiping Satan, obviously” and she was like “Seems a bit conceited to worship
deleteyourlife: i’m so stupid today i was getting off the bus and i was like spacing out and then i was like “bye love you” to my bus driver like cuz that’s what you say on the phone when you hang up but I WAS TRYING TO SAY “THANK YOU” AND
kangarude: when i was in like 6th grade this girl on my bus said she had a secret to tell me and she took a deep breath and she was like “im bisexual” and i was just like okay and then she started crying and hugged me because she was afraid nobody
emmastonrs: It was like I woke up when she came in. She was the last person to screen-test, and I was so bored of it by then that I was mucking about—I’d been pretending I was Tom Hanks or Seth Rogen. And then she came in, and it was like diving
elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey: 3-2-1queer: When I was in fifth grade I realized I liked girls but I was like “that’s a problem for another day” and literally forgot about it and then in like eleventh grade I was like “oh my god” YOU PROCRASTINATED
don’t judge! so when I was in there he just like gave me the IV and I was like … idk I felt extremely high and then it was all weird and blurry I can’t really explain it and then I was out and it was over and apparently I kept saying
cigeur: “It was like the world stopped turning in that instant. Like everyone around us had disappeared. Like everything at home was forgotten about. It was as if those few minutes on this world were created just for us and all we could do was look
ashholeirwin: remember when liam and niall called that girl who won the star caller contest thing and they were like why are you whispering and she was like im in class rn and liam was like oh no im so sorry go back to learning and niall was like can
malloryrobyn: burgrs: in 9th grade i was getting picked on in class and this girl was like “fuck you guys leave him alone” and called me over to her seat and I was like “thx lol” and she was like “I have something special to show you don’t
lesreichenbachfinn: so today my mom was being all momish and she was like “what if we turned our house into a bed and breakfast” and I was like ummm yeah except there are literally no empty rooms in our house and she was like “we could convert
tippingvelvets: today at work a little kid came in to order their birthday cake and their mom was like “(deep sigh) tell them what you want on your cake” and the kid was like “ELSA” and the mom was like “(deeper sigh) and?” and the kid was
homosexualchronicles: senatorgana: today my dad was like “hey honey are you mad at me?” and i was like ???? no?????? and he was like “oh okay, it’s just that you haven’t called me daddy in a long time and i was worried that i’d done something
thelastcenturion-thesortinghat: roachpatrol: ok so what if Harry and Neville got into like this passive-aggressive lie-off regarding what a truly great man Severus Snape was like they got drunk and Harry was like ‘Snape though’ and Neville was like
I had a dream me and darfin had a threesome with this really cute girl and like I went down on her while he was having sex with me then he was like ‘I don’t want to make you upset’ and I was like 'JUST GRAB HER BOOBS’ it was weird
last night I talked to my mom about going to a doctor and she was like yes that sounds like a good idea and I was kinda crying etc the usual and then this morning class was kind of weird and I felt sick like throwing up, but I feel like I shouldn’t
Yesterday my mom was like, “Want to watch The Amazing Spider Man 2?” She never does anything like that. I was like, “Maybe another day.” On the inside I was like “Lol, never going to watch it. Lol, movies make me want to
romangodfrey: lesreichenbachfinn: so today my mom was being all momish and she was like “what if we turned our house into a bed and breakfast” and I was like ummm yeah except there are literally no empty rooms in our house and she was like “we
there was So much lagging, during one of the trasformation sequences I was like “and I’ll form the LAG”and someone was like “never skip lag day”and my friend was like I’ll gladly skip that
i had a dream weiss was telling everyone “hey so, like, my last name? it’s pronounced “Schnee” but its, like, actually spelled ‘Shnaa’.” everyone was like wow omg !! except blake who was like “uh, that sounds fake but ok”
titanbender: seychelle was so nice, when i asked for her autograph she was like yeah sure and she was like omg i gtg cuz all the security ppl were like COME ON LOSERS WERE GOING SHOPPING so she was in a hurry, and look how adorable she looks when she
