bbcsherlockpickuplines
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“Are you a complete flake who happens to be a genius? Because you are unbelievably hot!”
“I’ve got some pictures for you as a treat… And I’m not talking about the ones I showed Archie.”
“I’d let you catch me in a compromising position… and I’m not talking about being on the treadmill.”
“My cock is good for more than just peeing in fireplaces.”
“You may have made my arm squishy, but you’ve made something else of mine rock hard.”
“I don’t think we should wear hats… unless you mean the other kind of hat.”
“Forget Appledore… Make me your Applewhore.”
“Let’s do a procedure where the participants tend to know each other and it’s over when one of them’s dead… No, I’m not talking about murder.”
“I don’t just do it doggy style– I do it Redbeard style.”
“Even if you told me that the Western world is run from a single house, I’d still want to talk about dinner.”
“I bet I can make you come in less the time Sherlock’s exile took.”
Hey guys! I’m working on new t-shirt designs because my current ones aren’t selling too well, plus I wanted to come up with a generic Sherlocky graphic that I could pair any pick-up line with. Do you guys like the look of these? And which
“Girl, are your initials A.G.R.A.? Because you are Amazing, Gorgeous, Radiant, and Adorable.”
Okay guys, I got some of the new t-shirt designs up! There are six so far, but I’m planning on adding more over the next few days. (I’ve also lowered the prices on all of my t-shirts!) “Is this Reichenbach? Because I think I’m
“The game is never over. I want to play with you forever.”
Five more t-shirts now available! “Is that a riding crop under your coat, or are you just happy to see me?” “Let’s talk about the birds and the Bee Gees.” “I made you some shoes.” “I bet I can make your
“I’d let you contaminate my ‘crime scene.’” Submitted by anonymous.
“Are you London? Because I want to get to know you and breathe in every quiver of your beating heart.”
“You make me Claire-de-la-Swoon.”
“I need condoms so big, people call me Charles Augustus Magnum-sen.”
“Appearing in my mind palace while I’m unconscious? I believe that makes you the man of my dreams.”
“Knowing is owning, but that’s not why I want to get to know you.”
“I could never bear to argue with you, even if I wasn’t something of a moron.”
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“Those things’ll kill you… I know what you should put in your mouth instead.”
“I’ll be your housekeeper… Maybe I’ll exotic dance for you too.” Submitted by anonymous.
“I would never tell you to get out of my head when I’m busy.” Submitted by anonymous.
“I’d have another row with the chip and PIN machine for you.” Submitted by anonymous.
“Forget faking my genius… Want to see a different sort of magic trick?” Based on a suggestion by anonymous.
“My penis is a dagger– a scalpel wielded with precision and without remorse.”
“Becoming a figment of my mind palace isn’t the only way to get inside of me.”
More t-shirts now available! “I would have dinner with you even if I wasn’t hungry.” “I’ve been reliably informed that I don’t have a heart because you stole it.” “It’s a good thing I find breathing
“Not sure about having chemistry with me? Don’t worry, I’m an excellent chemist.”
“Us meeting couldn’t be coincidence. The universe is rarely so lazy.”
“I would never put the doorbell in the fridge if you were the one ringing it.”
“Without you, I get so bored that I start shooting walls.”
“My mouth is big enough for fourteen cigarettes. Wanna see what else can fit in it?”
“Let’s have quite a lot of sex.”
“Wanna see my Sher-cock?”
“I would jump out of a cake for you even if I wasn’t revealing that I faked my death.”
“People like you deserve to be kissed. That’s why there are people like me.”
“The Headless Nun was only headless because she hadn’t met me… I’m excellent at giving head.”
“I would let you call me Sherl.”
“I know you’re not some character from Lord of the Rings, because I honestly care what you think.”
“My friendship isn’t the only thing that can give you warmth and constancy.”
Happy Father’s Day, everyone! (And thanks to my friend Jess for suggesting that today’s comic be a dad joke, hahaha.)
“If I was looking for a friend in a drug den, I wouldn’t just be browsing– I’d be looking for you.”
“You give me life, and not just because Lazarus is go.”
“I would never tell you to f-cough.”
“If you got away from me, I’d be so upset, I’d start kicking a tire.”
“You’re so great, even my shirt is giving you thumbs up.”
“I would love you even if you messed up my sock index.”
“I would let you call me Myc.”
“You always feel love, but you don’t have to fear it.”
“When I asked if you came for me, I didn’t just mean to the drug den.”
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