shipless
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“Are you a fire extinguisher? Because I want to dance and break into the crown jewels with you.”
“I’m like Anderson’s beard… I’ll grow on you.”
“The game is on… Will you play with me?”
“You make me more out of breath than Mycroft on a treadmill.”
“My last name may be Small, but my dick is huge.”
“Are you one of John’s jumpers? Because you look so cozy and unique.”
“Dieting is for Mycroft. Come on, you know you want a taste of me.”
“I guess people can stop calling me The Ice Man, because you’ve melted my heart.”
“Are you a train car in Sumatra? Because you are the bomb.”
“I want to have more meetings with you than Magnussen had with the prime minister.”
“Without you, my heart is like the coin that Mary shot… There’s an empty hole in it.”
“I want you Anderneath me.”
“I heard you like a man in uniform, so I keep mine on even when it tries to kill me.”
“Wanna know why my Belstaff coat is so long?” Suggested by someone I know in real life, who doesn’t have a Tumblr and is too embarrassed to take credit for the idea anyway.
“Without you, my heart is as broken as Mrs. Hudson’s hip.”
“Being without you is worse than going to a matinee of Les Mis with my parents.”
“I want you wrapped around me more tightly than my purple shirt.”
“A headphones-wearing bison isn’t the only thing I’d like up against my wall.”
“Redbeard isn’t the only one I’d like to be petting.”
“I think about Redbeard when I want to calm down, but I think about you when I want to get excited.”
“I only have earbuds for you.”
“I would share my ‘herbal soothers’ with you.”
“I heard you want the D… and I’m not talking about deductions.”
“If you were my drug, I wouldn’t need a case to justify doing you.”
“You could make me feel alive even if I were one of Molly’s cadavers.” Based on a suggestion by madspades.
“Let’s adopt cats together… Hounds drive me crazy.” Based on a suggestion by madspades.
Happy Halloween, Tumblr! I mustache that you share your candy ;)
“Makeover queen? No, I’m the makeout queen.”
“My love for you is bigger than Henry Knight’s house.”
“I love you more than Carl Powers loved his shoes.”
“Don’t hate the dragon slayer. Hate the game.”
“You smell cleaner than Kenny Prince’s cat.”
“Being without you hurts worse than reading Alone On the Water.” [ LiveJournal / FanFiction.net / AO3 ]
“My love for you isn’t like Lord Moran’s bomb– it doesn’t have an off switch.”
“I fell for you harder than Rupert Graves in the gag reel.”
“You make me wetter than a fireplace that’s just met Magnussen.”
“If you think the wait in between seasons is long, just wait until you see my dick.”
“The thought of being without you scares me more than a Baskerville Hound.”
“You make me blush so much, my face is the same color as Jennifer Wilson’s wardrobe.”
“If you be my goldfish, I promise to keep you plenty wet.”
“You’re the West to my Wood.” Submitted by Courtney (no username).
“Lestrade? More like Lust-rade.”
“Are you Anderson’s fake Jack the Ripper? Because I want to bone you.”
“Let’s multiply like Bluebell.”
“I bet I can make you thirstier than Greg alone at a wedding.”
“You don’t need to be Kate Middleton for me to treat you like royalty.”
“What’s your star sign? I don’t know mine because I deleted the solar system.”
“I hope our relationship lasts longer than John’s mustache.”
“You don’t have to show me beheadings to get a hug from me.”
“Lestrade will find his division before I find someone better than you.”
“I may not be Uncle Rudy, but I’ll cross-dress for you if that’s what you’re into.”
“My mind palace can’t even contain how much I think about you.”
“You’ve seen what these fingernails can do to a wood floor… Would you like me to leave some claw marks on your back?”
“I would take off my clothes for you even if it was going to kill me.”
“I love a shaved pussy… and I’m not talking about Sekhmet.”Suggested by someone I know in real life, who doesn’t have a Tumblr and is too embarrassed to take credit for the idea anyway.
“I ship us like Mrs. Hudson ships Johnlock.”Based on a suggestion by amylemoymoy.
“We should go clubbing together. And I don’t mean going to the Diogenes Club.”
“My death may have been fake, but my love for you is real.”
“You don’t need to pay £2,995 to be my V.I.P.”
“Take me up against the Reichenbach Wall.”
![“Being without you hurts worse than reading Alone On the Water.” [ LiveJournal / FanFiction.net / AO3 ]](http://64.media.tumblr.com/c09287926d3ae7e4cb326b79469f8bb6/tumblr_nf0ufpy4OE1r9lnxmo1_250.png)
