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i’m sorry followerseveryone send help please to deal with this crisis i need at least an entire day off which i do not have i will just make it through somehow on one cylinder while the rest are screaming and crying in the fetal position
Torn between: I am ok I can make it This is ok I can make this work This will be okay I can live with this Relatively good mood; functional; positive outlook And This is not okay This is a catastrophe This is a crisis I am in crisis I cannot function
My therapy homework for the last week has been to pet my cat every day. I am blessed. Working only one job, I am guaranteed at least one day a week that I do not work. This alone should put me on a healing path. This kind of freedom 800% puts me in a
Sssssshhhhh I ordered a bunch of clothes and some of them came in today :)
Last night, I admitted to my little brother (who I am very close to) in a text message that I feel sad a lot. “But you might have already guessed that,” I added.He asked me if I had played music lately. No, I had not. He said that helps him
My spike of bitterness is better now. I was claiming I was “in the process of making peace with it” but that is only partially true. I am not 100% free of sadness or resentment at the situation. But you do know what I AM free of? Dean. As
I went to the cat shelter again just now. I met a few more cats. I went down the list asking about the cats I viewed online and got to a cat named Tim. When I met him, I wasn’t sure. He was an elderly cat. Not as vibrant in movement or appearance.
I’ve been spoiled by living in a college town, I guess. I refer to the fact that it’s not even 11 pm and all the takeout places are closed! Providing myself with decent food is always too complicated
004mog: How is hot tea so goooooood So I’ve been asked what my favorite tea is. I’m not a tea connoisseur, I just drink what tastes good that’s ended up in my pantry. I had this orange spice stuff that was divine and drank it all.
Yeah, I’m scared, okay. You know what I’m talking about, you see it all over your dash. But in PARTICULAR what I am scared about is my own goddamn anxiety. Those who don’t act are complicit, right? Well, I don’t plan on acting.
I have so much anxiety from work today. It’s the “I did something(s) rude/terrible/shameful and I am awful” variety and it will just not let go. I haven’t felt this way in roughly a year since I restarted anti-anxiety medication.
I feel frustrated and bad at my job right now. Maybe when I’m not lying sideways in my bed on mobile, I’ll explain why and put it under a readmore.
Sometimes I think meta about my career in retail. I can make a lot of snark, I ENJOY making snark, but at the end of the day I’m out to help customers. Not punish them. So I feel a little bit guilty about the snark sometimes. One thing that I see
Every once in a while, Dean will send me a Snapchat selfie captioned “bored” Yeah someone is basic and boring here and it’s definitely not me
Noooooo I got spoiled on the korrasami kiss in turf wars and I did not want to :(
I’m a bit worried that I’ve been too harsh on Gabrielle. She’s hesitant to come close to me as often, today, and she looks to me frequently like she senses she is in trouble. I obviously do not hit her; I say (maybe shout?) “no” sternly
I’m in my hometown again and oh no it’s Dean Don’t have time for details yet…just send me some support guys cuz he set my self confidence back about 20 paces. He shouldn’t have this much power over me 7 months later:(
I have a history of anxiety with Dean. Back when Dean liked me and regularly flirted with me, I didn’t know how to respond or reciprocate. I was also in a depressive episode, but did not yet know that I had depression. I didn’t know
Gabrielle is not happy because I shut her in my room but now I am enjoying my Frosty without a cat on the table trying to get a share
I feel so bad for my poor angel. She’s not herself at all and I want her to be back to normal so badly. I’m sleeping on the floor in the living room so I can be nearer to her.
Gabrielle needs to STOP going for my eye when I’m in my bed. The warm snuggles are FANTASTIC. But like I’m not going to lose an eye over them.
I’m just so bored all the time like I’ve never been in years!!!I wish I was married, JUST so I would be less bored. Not because I don’t want to die alone or w/e. I’m just bored and the most acceptable roommate option is definitely
My parents fell in love with Gabrielle so quickly. They both wanted to hold her before they went back home to give her a hug, even though she’d rather not be picked up! They each on their own told her how much they loved her.
just got hung up on by someone who applied to our store via a job aggregate websitethat application isn’t official, so i have to call people to invite them for an interviewi got as far as “hi, my name is mog”i think he may have thought I was a prerecorded
I AM SO FUCKING SICK OF RACIST CUSTOMERS WHO SUCK AT COMMUNICATING COMPLAINING ABOUT OUR OUTSOURCED CALL CENTERS IN THE PHILIPPINES AND NO LADY I AM NOT GOING TO “DOCUMENT” YOUR COMPLAINT BYE.
A life without Neil asking me out is one I’m not interested in living
I did the thing where I slept in cuz I was having a good dreamIt was reylo The reylo dream did not continue instead i got tricked into moving into a shitty apartmentFuck
Aaarrrgh I have so much work stress. It’s not anything I can’t do, but this all happened incredibly short notice and I have an EXPLOSION of responsibility and everyone around me to share the workload is leaving or is already gone.In the midst
Had a dream we were living in the alien apocalypse. 0/10 do not recommend. Everything was like a Resident Evil video game. Monsters everywhere and people infected with alien spores making them some combination of violently ill and/or murderous OR seeming
I want to take you out to dinner tonight. I’m not going to ask because I know you can’t say yes. Yet.-Neil, today, because he came in when he wasn’t even scheduled again to see me
Yeah I’m grumpy today Long story short my one weekly day off contained 5 hours at workAnd an employee tried to start a bitch fit with me when I was in street clothes, over….no, no i am not going to turn this into a 2000-word vent.
My messages are open. If anyone can talk me through this. As in how not to want to hurt myself. The urge won’t stay away.
it is so hot in here and my cat is on my lap and she is even hotter but move her? i think i would rather die thanks
2018: got sick last weekend of August2017: got sick first weekend of September2016: got sick mid- or late September2015: I remember not having my voice in OctoberEvery time at the doctor: no I have no allergies
I feel like I’m in a TV series at the end of an episode that took 2 people who not only like each other but go super well together and would make each other happy and should be together, and broke them up purely for Plot
if continuing to follow me is important to you, please message me, I cannot guarantee this blog will still be here in 5 hoursEdit: if you are a human and not a robot your follow is important to me because if I wanted a diary that no one would read, I
For the first time in my life, I can honestly say that at the moment, I love Geometry. Our homework is to draw shapes. There’s not even any math involved. We’re just drawing shapes. And it’s so much fun.
Constantly worried about this irrational fear of having people fall in love with me and not being able to emote anything back
Respect my decision to not want to talk to you especially when I haven’t been in the brightest of moods lately
Problem is our mutual friend that bae and I and everyone else hasn’t seen in a year is here visiting for three weeks and I only have this weekend to be here and I really just want him to myself so I can maybe get the d… Its not even that.
Soooo this past weekend tho. So much up and down for me, but it was totally worth it. Reminds me that I’m not as heartless as I tend to think I am. I don’t even know where to begin… All I can say is I’m now involved in a love
Am I one of the few who actually didn’t know what he wanted to do so decided to stay at home and figure life out and not put my whole family in debt?
So listening to literally all my metal in a huge shuffled playlist and listening to “Feels Like Forever (Acoustic)” by Of Mice & Men when suddenly the original plays right after it. I swear I did not set it up like that
Honey don’t be trying to read in-between my lines 24/7 bc it’ll only fuck you up NOT ME. If I’m speaking cryptically and you’re smart, you’ll KNOW
steppingoncellphones: Hi, the itty-bittiest update: I’m in Tokyo (it’s officially been two weeks now). Kanji is going to kill me. I keep talking big on here about coming back but that’s not happening until I get my shit together for Intensive Japanese
Hand tawsing is extremely intense, but it ticks off a lot of boxes for me. You have to be an active participant in your punishment as you keep your hands up. There’s eye contact. It’s very formal and traditionally academic. Also, it hurts a lot.@linnylace
Not a robot, but a ghost.
godtricksterloki: Have faith, dear boyfriend, for you are not alone in the suffering.But I’m sitting this one out, I don’t like twinkies. I WANT MY MUTHAFUKIN’ TWINKIES!!
Overall, this has been a pretty shitty week and I needed it not to be. Next week it better be good, since I’ll most likely start in earnest again to get a new job.
I keep getting asked to make a list like this and I *finally* have some free time, so here’s an assortment of albums I’ve been super into this year! While it’s in no way a complete list it should give you an idea of the vibe I’ve
good things about today: new hoover (it is amazing and so powerful it almost took up the carpets and a couple of shoes) which means clean house (it got rid of SO MUCH CAT HAIR) delicious food (yey) sebby playing with his bowtie toy like nothing else in
I dare you to blast this in your car and try NOT to have a better day.
Ok Just a small housekeeping announcement.
First weekend home from school and actually having a lot of fun. Not a bad night for a bonfire out in the woods. :)
It should not be legal for littles to work in a daycare.
sometimes I just need a little quiet time in my brain. Space to sort out all the details of daily life without the details of the present.
My teacher that I always blog about just came out to us, bragged that he was excommunicated from the mormon church, and played us a song about how he came to terms with not believing in God and packing up and moving on.
Power Update I have been trying to handle my whole not having power situation as best as I can, but I can’t anymore. I found out that PSE&G just has to unlock my box. Then we have to get an electrician to come in and wire everything. So
hatterandahare: theblatheringpeacock: waerloghosts: every song is about ur otp if u try hard enough donnie crying in my car the entire ride home for thanksgiving as each song started on the light fm station KILLED ME. WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO
