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feed-me-fitness: amburgurandfries: enterthedreamatorium: If you’re a boy who walked up to younger/nerdier girls in the hallway during high school and said “hey my friend thinks you’re cute” and then burst into giggles along with said friend
lokiloo: So today this family came into the restaurant and I while I was serving them, their son saw my Iron Man and Captain America charms and said ‘Avengers! I love the Avengers!’ I smiled and asked who his favorite was, and he said “Iron Man!’
imessaged: In my 10 year old brother’s class they were asked for “a modern invention you can’t live without” and my brother told me everyone said tv except for him who said “water filtration”
kystick94: Dean, Remember What you said about Edge?! Don’t forget about what he said about Orton. “Randy Orton.. I dunno my father, what makes you think I give a shit who yours is? Third Generation. Suck my dick.” – In Your Head Radio Feb
peetasfakeleg: so i was having a driving lesson today and my instructor told me to be gentle with the gear stick and treat it like a lady and i said “im sorry i cant do that” and he said “oh youre a girl who likes it rough then” and i swear i
muchtoocynical: communismkills: Hey remember when Bernie Sanders said women fantasize about rape?Hey remember when Hillary Clinton defended a rapist?Hey.What’s that “rape culture” you guys said you were against? for anyone who sees this, some
enterthedreamatorium: If you’re a boy who walked up to younger/nerdier girls in the hallway during high school and said “hey my friend thinks you’re cute” and then burst into giggles along with said friend then I really hope you’re doing badly
sarahthegoblinqueen: some guy came into our class and the teacher didn’t see him until she was doing attendance she saw him and asked “who let you in?” and he said “Ashley Katchadourian” then someone in the back said “Ashley Katchadourian
lovelyandbrown: earlier today at target this sweet older white lady who rang me up was staring at me, then finally said your skin is so rich and deep, like really good coffee. you must love your complexion. i honestly answered her and said it took me
lokineinndottir: // WHAT? Someone just said Eva Green is very pretty, but nothing special… … What? Who said that? I must kill them now.
micdotcom: Here are the women who’ve gone public about Bill Cosby: 1. Kristina Ruehli said Cosby raped her at 22 in 1965, when she was a secretary at a talent agency.2. Carla Ferrigno said Cosby tried to rape her in 1967 and she had to fight him off.3.
Mr. Crude carried a glass of water to Sabrina who was soaking in a tub full of bubbles.“You look comfortable,” he said.“To be perfectly honest, I’m a little bit sore. You were a little rough on me last night,” she said.“I’m sorry! I thought
While out shopping, Mr. Crude was greeted by a pair of twins.“Excuse us! Aren’t you Mr. Crude from the university?”“Yes, I am. And who are you two?”“I’m Jennifer,” said the one holding the umbrella. “I’m Jessica,” said the other, “and
Carolina thanked Mr. Crude for coming to her birthday party.“I see several hats on the table, but it looks like I’m the only one who showed up!” he said.Carolina grinned as she lifted the hem of her skirt and said, “You’re the only person I
Sabrina stared into Mr. Crude’s eyes and said, “You’ll never guess who isn’t wearing a bra under her sweater!” She then started laughing and said, “Well, I’m sure you can guess. Come slip your hands inside and feel for yourself, old man.”“You
“Nope, sorry,” said Mr. Crude. “I can’t decide who should get it first. You two will have to make the decision.”Yeni looked at Neiva’s ass, gave it a little pat and then said, “If you’ll promise not to cum deep inside her ass, maybe even
When Mr. Crude saw that Melissa had pulled down her shorts he told her, “I hope you’re not planning on running the bases like that!”She looked at him, laughed and said, “Who said anything about playing ball? This is what I use
Get a cat they said, so much less responsibility than a dog they said…anyone who has a Bengal cat will know 😂 @lumibengal #JustLikeADog by lydiaemillen
mysextrets: “"So I saw this picture on Instagram the other day and it said “what would you do if you woke up to this?” And the first guy who commented really pissed me off. He said that he would be pissed as hell and that he would make her
dragons-and-gays: the most life-changing customer i’ve ever had at work was a guy who came up to me and my coworker when we were at cash and said ‘hey kids…. wanna see something?’ and I said sure because why the fuck not, i’m here for a good
youngdelrey-blog: You said to “be cool”, but I’m already coolest. I said to “get real”, don’t you know who you’re dealing with?
yobootyassgirl: capricious-muse: baawri: clarknokent: quitethefreak: yourdaddyneedshisprincess: quitethefreak: im2prada4you: Probably the most stupid thing I’ve read all day. Said the white woman. Said the woman who’s entirely entitled to
medievalswords:when lizzo said “self love is survival” and when hannah gadsby said “do you understand what self-deprecation means when it comes from somebody who already exists in the margins? it’s not humility. it’s humiliation”
catsforlivvy: i-dont-care-what-u-say: adirectiongirl: sensitizes: we all have that friend who has to ask her mother to breathe i asked my mom if it was ok to reblog this and she said yes My mom said no, but I do it anyway *gasps of horror*
astrodidact: Federal authorities have arrested 170 immigrants who came forward seeking to sponsor migrant children in government custody, Immigration and Customs Enforcement officials said. ICE said Tuesday that the arrests were of immigrants suspected
andreashettle:mizkit:My son, who is 4, and I were walking along the street today and saw a man with his left leg amputated beneath the knee. My son spun around and looked at him, then said to me, “That man lost his leg! What happened?”I said I didn’t
virgoassbitch:A while ago, there was this guy who was trying to get at me on tinder but I looked at his Instagram and he had a long term girlfriend… so I messaged her saying her man was on tinder and she said I was mistaken… then I said noooo he’s
toboldlylesbian: toboldlylesbian: toboldlylesbian: yesterday at the store, i said “babe” to get my girlfriends attention and like four women who aren’t my girlfriend looked at me and the lesbian power fjrjfndmsmzksp i said it again at the bar
a-sweetheart-being-40: Similar…. I talked to a dear friend yesterday who was celebrating his wedding anniversary. He said the key to a good marriage is marijuana. He said that’s the only way he’s survived all these years. He would get pissed at
highescapes: lightningstrik3s: My dad was like who’s deadmau5?I left the room in shame not as bad as what my mom said, she said.. “oh look! Mickey Mouse, why is he there?”
jerkidiot: jerkidiot: there was a girl on my bus who was on tumblr and i looked at her and said “tumblr is the worst thing that has ever happened to me” and she looked at me and said “i know i follow you” she walked up to me in the hallway
cosmonautcat: earlier today on the internet i saw somebody who had said something stupid and now they were getting all defensive and they said the following: “I was JFK” i assume they meant “i was just fucking kidding” but i was all
singletman: randy9bis: Beautiful physique, and fabulous tattooed sleeve ! :-) “The guy who did my left arm tattoos , said he’d be right back to start work on my right arm “. “ He said he had something he had to take care off, thats what
darkdomsc1982: attanemusic: Married Niggress obeys Whote patron Who told her to suck his sick. for not giving him a refund without a receipt. She said ok pull it out. He said hed be back later and she didnt believe him. When he returned she kept her
worstcats: Hi everyone. I kind of forgot about this blog until someone reminded me about it. I felt like maybe I’d said enough about these cats, because there are other problems in the world. But I met some people who said they thought it was really
superwholock2097: Doctor Who, It’s fun they said. Nothing that will scar you for life they said.
maggieblueberry: In Palo Alto, California, members of the Raging Grannies Action League said that men who want drugs such as Viagra to treat impotence should be required to have strict testing before receiving said drugs. The Grannies applauded Ohio
heysammy: whiskyandoldspice: friendly reminder that, for all we know, Sam still thinks that it was Dean who said this to him: “Listen to me, you bloodsucking freak. Dad always said I’d either have to save you or kill you. Well, I’m giving you
This student who has issies with me came in asked me if I was teaching and when I said yes she said she wasn’t going to take class. Likeeee u got issue if you wake up at 5am to come and tell someone you don’t like to take their classes lol.
sniffing: jerkidiot: jerkidiot: there was a girl on my bus who was on tumblr and i looked at her and said “tumblr is the worst thing that has ever happened to me” and she looked at me and said “i know i follow you” she walked up to me in
eroscott: suchaslesbians: “Enough of that,” Carla said as she pushed her sister onto her back. “Let’s get to the really fun part now.” As Carla went down on her sister, she looked up at her mother, who was recording all this, and said.”Remember,
