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666lewdandlaciviousforsatan: satanownsme1: #satan is my #daddy Give Daddy what’s his. He wants your sin and you’re delicious cum. Thank him for the demons who enter you and make you scream as you call out his name: Hail Satan! SATAN approves!
The fact that my mom’s boyfriend calls me his daughter is weird. because deep down I still hate him for what he did in the past.
ghost-anus: culler-of-booty: Omfg today at school I was talking to my gay friend and some random kid walked by and called me a fag hag and I didn’t know what to do so I just went up to the kid and hugged him and I was like “it’s okay, once you
nicolehoran-maybe: veni-vidi-igothammered: I love him because he’s the only one in their lives to call their bullshit basically saying what we’re all thinking
It’s only…. my hand that he’s touching… it’s only… my name that he’s calling… My whole body is burning, even thought I want to run away, I want him to touch me more. Is this… what love really is?
satansslittledevil: Best advice my 19 year old roommate gave me “Just give him three days. Wait three days, no texts, no calls, no nothing. Then see if he comes back” “What if I can’t wait three days tho??” “You see the thing is, you keep
bi-tami: Mrs C the last time you called the hotel to say you were in traffic & were talking to Mr E this is what I was doing as I sat across from him watching his cock grow in his slacks..…Yes when he hung up he DID go down on me…..He loves
i-once-had-a-guy-tell-me: I once had a guy say “What happened to letting boys be boys?” after we called the cops because we found him filming us in our home bathroom. (submitted by anonymous)
socialjusticekoolaid: No Justice, No Peace (11/14/14): It’s been an explosive day in “Darren Wilson” news. Most info we’ve gotten about him so far, to be honest. Here’s what you need to be caught up: Report: New Mike Brown shooting radio calls
redrosewitch: sissyfaggotroberta: sissyfaggotroberta: skinslavepig: dramaschoolboy: kayoshin: Faggot Roberta wants to be famous give him a call and let her know what do you think of his looks, 07792203597 fat slutty and fuck ugly queer yes i am
ultrafacts:From Billy Crystal’s memoir:When he called me to see if i wanted to run with him on a local country club:“I would love to,” i said. But that club is restricted. “What does that mean”? he asked. “It means they
naavscolors: Huh… that’s round. Really round.Killer Frost takes the prize, it doesn’t matter what people say, she is #1 period, also can somebody call Shane Glines and thank him for this?
celticpyro: forever-emo33: this man interrupts your wedding with an entire circus following him around and calls your bride a hoe, what do you do? Close the goddam door.
physicsofgridlock: browndog12: moss-nymph: Why do Bigfoot hunters try to lure him with a mating call? Do they have a game plan for if a squatch comes barreling toward them out of the woods full tilt with a raging boner? what the fuck do you think
ratchetlarry: harry begins his explanation and louis is just like then harry finishes and louis embarrasses him by clapping and one direction plays the well known game called follow the leader and does what louis does
jjsinterlude: satansslittledevil: Best advice my 19 year old roommate gave me “Just give him three days. Wait three days, no texts, no calls, no nothing. Then see if he comes back” “What if I can’t wait three days tho??” “You see the thing
brosresolution: furiousperversions13: rrraaazzz: All the guys at school have been telling him what a little slut his little sister is, so he breaks into the bathroom when she’s having a shower and treats her like the slut his friends have been calling
mynightwing: I was tanning out in the backyard. I went into what I thought was an empty house to get a drink, when I heard my brother call my name. I went into the living room, and saw him stroking his huge, naked cock with his head thrown back and his
anincestfamily: “Hey mom, what do you need? I heard you calling my na… Oh.”My son’s eyes glanced over my body as he fell speechless.“I need you,” I said, and lead him into my bed.
arsludicra: I don’t even know what sport this is, but his muscles make me want to lick him. It’s called “football”. Or rather, “American Football”. And agreed. xD
the-doctor-to-my-tardis: ghost-anus: culler-of-booty: Omfg today at school I was talking to my gay friend and some random kid walked by and called me a fag hag and I didn’t know what to do so I just went up to the kid and hugged him and I was like
jjongie-poo: askleetaemin-ah: Shut up it’s the closest I’m going to get to one in a long time because LOOK AT HOW CUTE IT ISSSSSSSSSSSSS If you don’t stop calling me a princess now I’m bringing him back What princess? Do you know a princess?
that-potter-guy: notquiteluke: wearesorryfortheinconvenience: today i said to my friend “i haven’t had a go-gurt in a really long time” AND HE LOOKED REALLY LOST?? AND I EXPLAINED TO HIM WHAT A GO-GURT WAS AND HE SAID “OH IN CANADA WE CALL
futurefantastic: flockofmorgpies: hehe it just now occurred to me that his name is spelled Louie in the show called Louie. like. that’s what makes him fictionalized I guess
theannieplanet:theannieplanet:before i started dating my boyfriend i had a dream that he asked me out and he said “what should i call you instead of boyfriend/girlfriend because youre agender” and i looked him straight in the eye and said “the vista
dean-the-piesexual: OK STORY TIME I WAS BABYSITTING THIS 6 YEAR OLD BOY AND WE ATE POPSICLES, THIS WAS THE JOKE ON MINE AND I TOLD IT TO HIM, BECAUSE THATS WHAT YOU DO WITH JOKES AND SO LIKE A DAY LATER I GET THIS CALL FROM HIS MOM AND SHE SAYS “My
wearesorryfortheinconvenience: today i said to my friend “i haven’t had a go-gurt in a really long time” AND HE LOOKED REALLY LOST?? AND I EXPLAINED TO HIM WHAT A GO-GURT WAS AND HE SAID “OH IN CANADA WE CALL THOSE TUBES” TUBE S BUT ITS
speremint: speremint: I forgot I told my villagers to call me “thot” and I had a stroke… so many regrets telling him what to say…
physicsofgridlock: browndog12: moss-nymph: Why do Bigfoot hunters try to lure him with a mating call? Do they have a game plan for if a squatch comes barreling toward them out of the woods full tilt with a raging boner? what the fuck do you think the
april:one time a cold caller tried to open with “we are calling about your recent car accident” and i asked him what a car was and he hung up
:Okay, not to be that person, but yall know how the press are just Done with Trump, and are openly poking fun at him and calling his lies for what they are?They could have been doing that the entire time if they weren’t cowards.
hezuart: Sora: “You can call me “daddy” from now on!“ Ventus: "What? Why do you get to be "daddy”? You’re the one who gave birth to him, so you should be “mommy”!“ Roxas: "Vanitas, could you kill these two for me?
danieljlayton: so-super-fucking-skinny: twinque: ordering pizza this is what i do everytime and then last time i did it i got a call from an old chinese man saying “i’m the only one working is it ok if i come” he got a ฤ tip Bless him.
torpidgilliver: dean-the-piesexual: OK STORY TIME I WAS BABYSITTING THIS 6 YEAR OLD BOY AND WE ATE POPSICLES, THIS WAS THE JOKE ON MINE AND I TOLD IT TO HIM, BECAUSE THATS WHAT YOU DO WITH JOKES AND SO LIKE A DAY LATER I GET THIS CALL FROM HIS MOM AND
theblackship: ghost-anus: culler-of-booty: Omfg today at school I was talking to my gay friend and some random kid walked by and called me a fag hag and I didn’t know what to do so I just went up to the kid and hugged him and I was like “it’s
i-will-call-you-sir: hecallsmemissy: go away….I’m busy here…. When I asked him what he would do if we were ever caught in flagrante delicto, he simply smiled and said, “finish.”
perksofbeingabrianna: jjsinterlude: satansslittledevil: Best advice my 19 year old roommate gave me “Just give him three days. Wait three days, no texts, no calls, no nothing. Then see if he comes back” “What if I can’t wait three days tho??”
ultrafacts: From Billy Crystal’s memoir:When he called me to see if i wanted to run with him on a local country club:“I would love to,” i said. But that club is restricted. “What does that mean”? he asked. “It means they
kindue replied to your chat: wrong number. What if Evelyn is his lost love and he’s looking for her? I hope he finds her too. if he calls me back, I’m going to make him happy and be his evelyn for a little while.
meaghanelaine: This morning my boyfriend called me and told me his best friend had died. Expressing my condolences, utterly confused, I went on to ask him what had happened. He then informed me that his goldfish, Jamal, had been found floating lifeless
dante1255: easyslutt: Part 2 - Finally i am able to upload it 😔 If you guys were me, what would you have said to my bf when i looked up at him? You can see he was kinda messing up my vibe when he kept talking to me calling me puta (slut/whore) lol
