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I asked my friend hsar what he’s getting me for Christmas i said “whatever nice thing you see in PINK” and he said “okay” then I asked him “am I work 40-60 bucks?” He said “yeh you’re worth millions. But first I have to buy my gf something”
sarahsizzites: snowpetrel: i was babysitting a little boy and girl once and the boy asked me if i had a boyfriend and i said “no!! but i have a girlfriend!” and he said “like a friend thats a girl?” and i said “no like a boyfriend but they’re
cremebuns: A man just walked past me and said “excuse me, but you look very nice tonight darlin” I said thank you and he said you’re welcome and walked off. And that is how you compliment a woman without harassing them
kinkylulu: believe-in-can-city: ddavestriderr: darlingstrider: eeuonym: if a guy said this to me i’d cry if a girl said this to me i’d cry if anyone said this to me i’d cry I cry because nobody says this to me i cry because i send this
tsundere-dragon: thehomelessone said: Having opinions?! Atrocious! What next, voting for what you believe in? piebeatscake said: you bully xhitorichi said: How dare you have an opinion. You all are great
purrprinthom: sketchinetch: cremebuns: emeralddragoness: cremebuns: A man just walked past me and said “excuse me, but you look very nice tonight darlin” I said thank you and he said you’re welcome and walked off. And that is how you compliment
sketchinetch: cremebuns: emeralddragoness: cremebuns: A man just walked past me and said “excuse me, but you look very nice tonight darlin” I said thank you and he said you’re welcome and walked off. And that is how you compliment a woman without
hazlegrace: “I’m in love with you,” he said quietly. “Augustus,” I said. “I am,” he said. He was staring at me, and I could see the corners of his eyes crinkling. “I’m in love with you, and I’m not in the business of
runnervegan: runningvegan: flatabsandthighgaps: “Be hydrated”, they said “It will give you good hair, and clear skin,” they said “It’s good for you,” they said “I CANNOT EVEN SLEEP BECAUSE I HAVE TO GO URINATE EVERY HALF HOUR”, I
sixpenceee:Here are some more of the creepiest things kids have said. I have a few more posts like this on my blog. Here they are.Creepy Things Said by Kids Part 1Creepy Things Said by Kids Part 2Kid’s Imaginary Friends
babesargent: remember the white dress i wore all through that film? george came up to me the first day of filming, took one look at the dress and said: “you can’t wear a bra under that dress.” “ok, i’ll bite,” i said. “why?” and he said:
bonerfart:i just did the BOFA thing to my mum and she goes “that’s very rude” and I said “i’m sorry, i meant it as a parody” and she said “of what?” then i said “a parod-eez nuts” and i heard my dad laugh from the other room
meso-mijali: rosalui: youngstero: I’m at a wealthy middle-aged christmas party with my best friend a woman came up to me and said “you have to try the gouda” and I said “is it firm?” and she said “yes I wouldn’t have anything less”
neneparcero: iram432navarrete: iram432navarrete: Straight Homeboy Said: I Ain’t Gay But Head Is Head Iramcito! I Said: Imma Swallow The Cum Out That Dick Dude! No Hands!! He Said: Yeah We’ll See That ,, That’s Not Possible & This Better
captioned-vines: xeno-cairbre: this prolly his best one bruh. 😂 “ I woke bae up this morning, and I told bae, “ I think this pussy done stopped breathing!” She said, “ Uh-uh!” I said, “ Uh-huh!” She said, “ Why you say that?”
lesliebensgone-blog: The three of them spoke at the same time; Hermione said, “the Cloak,” Ron said, “the wand,” and Harry said, “the stone.”
purrprinthom:sketchinetch:cremebuns:emeralddragoness:cremebuns:A man just walked past me and said “excuse me, but you look very nice tonight darlin” I said thank you and he said you’re welcome and walked off. And that is how you compliment a woman
fliptheworld: ‘Cause Jo said to me, when she came and saw Equus she said “I’m gonna write you naked in the seventh film now,” and I said, “Oh, Jo, HA HA HA,” like - AND THEN SHE DID. - Daniel Radcliffe
Kate Winslet has been made a CBE for services to drama by The Queen at Buckingham Palace. Kate said the Queen congratulated her and asked how much she enjoyed acting.’I said yes I liked it but not as much as being a mother,’ she said. ‘It is the
amospoe: “The Tantrics said the forces of creation and destruction lay in the binding and unbinding of a woman’s hair. The Syrians said a woman who combed her hair on the Eve of Holy Sunday consorted with werewolves. The Slavs said the vili,
mrgolightly: I said, “Honey, I don’t feel so good, don’t feel justifiedCome on, put a little love here in my void”He said, “It’s all in your head” and I said, “So’s everything”, but he didn’t get itI thought he was a man, but he
jayjsupremacy: Nobody said #AllLivesMatter until we said #BlackLivesMatterNobody said #HeterosexualPrideDay until we had #GayPrideNobody wants #WhiteHistoryMonth until its #BlackHistoryMonthNobody
charlottelabouffs: today i corrected someone who said accidentally said the monster’s name was frankenstein and i said “frankenstein was the scientist not the monster” then my professor went “but was frankenstein not the monster?” and i had
gallifreyantimelady: gallifreyantimelady: my dad said that this knife he was looking at was too thin and i said ‘all the better to slit throats with’ and he didn’t even react he said that he’s used to hearing my satanic homicidal remarks
noselfpreservation: When I was little, I ran up to my dad and told him excitedly, “Mom said I was a lesbian!” He looked startled. “I don’t think she told you that,” he said slowly. “Yes she did! She said I was a lesbian!” “No,
noselfpreservation:When I was little, I ran up to my dad and told him excitedly, “Mom said I was a lesbian!”He looked startled. “I don’t think she told you that,” he said slowly.“Yes she did! She said I was a lesbian!”“No,
buttalecki:when i was in primary school the head teacher stood up in assembly and said ”who can tell me the hardest word to say” so i put my hand up and said “antidisestablishmentarianism” and the principal said ”no the correct answer is the
roughtradenyc: me listening to the radio: Wow this song is so annoyion’t you dare look back just keep your eyes on me i said you’re holding back she said shut up and dance with me this woman is my destiny she said UUUUWWUUU SHUT UP AND DANCE
windandwater: “Your grandmother,” she said, “did she wear a hat?”“What? Oh … not usually,” said Tiffany, still thinking about the big show. “She used to wear an old sack as a kind of bonnet when the weather was really bad. She said hats
toxxsick69: dirtychild4: Daddy said he would gently put it in my little poop hole…. I have to stop trusting him No princess. That’s not what daddy said. I only said that I’d start off gentle. Besides, you should know better than to make daddy
lonesomemother1:My son said, “Mom, I have figured out the difference between you and the other girls I have had sex with.” When I asked him what that difference was he said, “You love me for who I am mom.” I smiled up at my sweet son and said,
incestuous-creampie: When my sister looked up at me and said, “I love you,” I was kind of taken aback. But I immediately said “I love you,” back, knowing that this was going to be more than the “just sex” we had originally said this incestcapade
lonesomemother1: My son invited me on vacation with him to Aruba. He said he even bought me a swim suit. I asked him if his father was coming along and he said, “No, daddy said he could not get the time off but I could still go with him since I
lumostheway: “Harry Potter isn’t real” they said “Magic is fake” they said “What’s that green light coming out of that stick” they said
snowpetrel: i was babysitting a little boy and girl once and the boy asked me if i had a boyfriend and i said “no!! but i have a girlfriend!” and he said “like a friend thats a girl?” and i said “no like a boyfriend but they’re a girl instead
countless-chances: today my teacher said “turn to the person next to you and tell them the best thing that happened to you today.” So this girl turned around and said “my pregnancy test came back negative” and I just said two packs of skittles
deanprincesster: one time this guy was hitting on me and he said “I’m loving the whole blonde hair, blue eyes thing” and I said “so did hitler” I literally said that to a person
ughstory: if a black person tells you something you said or did is offensive to their cultural identity, listen. if a woman tells you something you said or did makes them uncomfortable, listen. if a trans person tells you something you said or did is
