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“You smell cleaner than Kenny Prince’s cat.”
“My love for you burns like the A.G.R.A. flash drive.”
“I would punch the chief superintendent just because he called you a weirdo.”
“I think you’re cooler than the head in our fridge.”
“Are you frequenting cafes? Because you are smoking.”
“Are you Mr. Summerson? Because I’d like to fondle your testicles.”
“I always hear ‘suck my face’ when you’re speaking, but it’s usually subtext.” Submitted by Courtney (no username).
“Which hurt more: When you fell from Bart’s or when you fell from Heaven?”
“I cannot eliminate being with you, therefore it must not be impossible.”
“I know your friends don’t all hate you. I only wrote that essay so I could have you all to myself.”
“I’m not just a soldier, doctor, and blogger… I’m also a lover.”
“I want to be your boyfriend more than Sherlock wanted to be a pirate.”
“I want to be the first one you call for after waking up from being drugged by a dominatrix.”
“Are you Mary Morstan? Because those pants look so good on you, you’re putting the ass in assassin… twice.”
“I would name my daughter after you even if Sherlock wasn’t a girl’s name.”
“I don’t know about Sherlock, but I know exactly where to look.” Submitted by amylemoymoy.
“Judging by the turn-ups on your jeans, you’d be a pretty good father to my children.”Submitted by amylemoymoy.
“So, you say you’re on fire… Sounds like you need my hose.”Suggested by someone I know in real life, who doesn’t have a Tumblr and is too embarrassed to take credit for the idea anyway.
“I love a shaved pussy… and I’m not talking about Sekhmet.”Suggested by someone I know in real life, who doesn’t have a Tumblr and is too embarrassed to take credit for the idea anyway.
“I’d rip your clothes off in a darkened swimming pool even if people would talk.”Submitted by amylemoymoy.
“I ship us like Mrs. Hudson ships Johnlock.”Based on a suggestion by amylemoymoy.
“I can’t keep my eyes off of you… so I’m upgrading your surveillance status to grade three active.”
“You’re the missing piece to my puzzle… and I’m not talking about the puzzle Moriarty sent me.”Suggested by someone I know in real life, who doesn’t have a Tumblr and is too embarrassed to take credit for the idea
“Mary’s bullet isn’t the only thing that should have penetrated me.”Based on a suggestion by jc-cumberbatch.
“I would let you play me like Sherlock plays the violin.”
“Wanna get laid? And I don’t mean onto the pavement in front of Bart’s.â€
“Magnussen saw that my weakness is you.â€Submitted by anonymous.
“I love you more than Alex Woodbridge loved astronomy.â€
“I’m sorry I let it all slide… How about banging something other than my tea on the table?â€
“I’m hung better than the dummy in our living room.â€
“Your eyes are more colorful than John’s Christmas jumper.â€
“One more miracle, for me, please… Don’t have a boyfriend or girlfriend.â€Submitted by amylemoymoy.
“You should pop ‘round to Baker Street. Who knows? Something might jump out of my pants.â€Submitted by amylemoymoy.
“May I be the umbrella to your Mycroft? I want you to take me with you everywhere you go.â€
“I may make you take a separate cab, but I’ll never make you take a separate bed.â€
The top pick-up lines from every major character who’s appeared in more than one season, (based on number of notes).Thank you guys so much for 50,000 followers!!!!! <3
“I’m gonna climb you like Zhi Zhu climbs buildings.â€
“I bet you could warm my heart even if Sherlock was keeping it in the fridge.â€
“I would name my daughter after you even if your first name was William.â€
“I don’t take sugar in my coffee, but I’d love to get some sugar from you.â€
“I would help fix the afferent neurons in your peripheral nervous system.â€
“Your teeth are whiter than Molly’s lab coat.â€
“Mrs. Hudson offered me a cup of tea, but I’d much rather have a drink of you.â€
“My shirt buttons may strain to get away from me, but I bet you won’t.â€
“You’re more fun than a woman lying dead.â€
“I know you’re for real… Nobody could fake having such an amazing dick all the time.â€
“You don’t need to manipulate security cameras to convince me to get into your car.â€
“When you said you were on tinder, I realize you meant buried in Magnussen’s bonfire, but I’d still like to swipe right.â€
“Just call me a Baskerville Hound, because I can’t keep my paws off of you.â€
“Your wit is sharper than Irene Adler’s heels.â€
“John says I’m a machine… Want to see if you can turn me on?â€
“Mycroft says that you have the brain of a scientist or a philosopher, but I think you have the brain of my future husband.â€
“If you think the illustrator’s out of control, you should see me in the bedroom.â€
“When I said ‘the dog one,’ I wasn’t talking about your story. I was trying to think of the sex position.â€
“Broadly speaking, I’d like to have a ‘function’ in your ‘narrative.’“
“I’m not a plot device… The only function I want in your narrative is love interest.â€
“If you can always tell a good Chinese by examining the bottom third of the door handle, then what can we tell by examining your knob?â€Submitted by nzeuropean.
“It’s fine. It’s all fine when you’re around.â€Submitted by nzeuropean.
“I don’t have friends, just potential love interests.â€Submitted by nzeuropean.
“Unlike my work for the British government, I occupy a major position in the bedroom.â€Submitted by nzeuropean.