firstborn
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cassandamn: friend: makes a typo me: makes fun of the typo, repeats the typo for the next ten minutes straight, makes puns based on the typo, names my firstborn after the typo
Millennials are treating pets like 'their firstborn child,' and it's reportedly causing problems for some of the best-known pet food brands
fierzz: firstborn-of-akatosh: brujahinaskirt: modding skyrim be like
catphistopheles: writing-prompt-s: Years ago, you promised your firstborn to a witch. Since then, despite your best efforts, you can’t seem to get laid. The witch is starting to get pretty pissed. Y’all get together to discuss your options and
snailfeet: snailfeet: funny boy moments 1 I owe my blood, soul, and firstborn child to this post
azor-the-lawbringer: firstborn-of-akatosh: brujahinaskirt: modding skyrim be like
only-1-a: catphistopheles: writing-prompt-s: Years ago, you promised your firstborn to a witch. Since then, despite your best efforts, you can’t seem to get laid. The witch is starting to get pretty pissed. Y’all get together to discuss your options
camalilium: is anyone else gonna acknowledge the fact that the Firstborn Millhorse was straight up murdered cuz I’m high key upset hgidsoghsd
cassandamn:friend: makes a typome: makes fun of the typo, repeats the typo for the next ten minutes straight, makes puns based on the typo, names my firstborn after the typo
rlyhigh: saevuswinds: vardaesque: you don’t understand i would sell my firstborn to know how this story started Well it all started when Mrs. Hayfer wanted me to babysit her dumb house. When I got the keys, I sat them on top of this pie that I found
cassandamn: friend: makes a typome: makes fun of the typo, repeats the typo for the next ten minutes straight, makes puns based on the typo, names my firstborn after the typo
twelvefootmountaintroll: i’m gonna name my firstborn “arial” and people will be like “oh like the mermaid” and i’ll say “no like the font”
vardaesque: saevuswinds: vardaesque: you don’t understand i would sell my firstborn to know how this story started Well it all started when Mrs. Hayfer wanted me to babysit her dumb house. When I got the keys, I sat them on top of this pie that
la-meilleure-amie: everyone says they want a fairytale wedding but when i show up and curse their firstborn suddenly i’m the jerk
dreaminpng:jcatgrl:copperbadge:persinetteinthetower:moriartythetease: So what happens if two people who have promised their firstborn to separate witches have a child together? Do they both just pop up in the nursery and have a custody battle? I need
jcatgrl:copperbadge:persinetteinthetower:moriartythetease: So what happens if two people who have promised their firstborn to separate witches have a child together? Do they both just pop up in the nursery and have a custody battle? I need a book about
acosmodot: moonkidash: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses: well maybe if adoption was more accessible to single parents and lesbian couples, witches wouldn’t have to go haggling for people’s firstborns This wasn’t how I thought this post was going to
dumbvahkiin: selfie-legolas: i know what i’m naming my firstborn thanks behindthename.com IF YOU WERE GOING FOR ‘HELLA’ THEN LET ME TELL YOU ‘HELLA’ MEANS A STOVE IN FINNISH THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A AND Ä IS CRUCIAL
jcatgrl:copperbadge:persinetteinthetower:moriartythetease:So what happens if two people who have promised their firstborn to separate witches have a child together? Do they both just pop up in the nursery and have a custody battle?I need a book about
la-meilleure-amie: Everyone SAYS they want a fairytale wedding but when I show up and curse their firstborn suddenly I’m a jerk.
gisellemadnessscene: la-meilleure-amie: everyone says they want a fairytale wedding but when i show up and curse their firstborn suddenly i’m the jerk I’M DYING
virginsplayground: zvxvywixcfvd-deactivated2013102: Jareth | Labyrinth (1986) Probably gonna name my firstborn Jareth tbh
jcatgrl: copperbadge: persinetteinthetower: moriartythetease: So what happens if two people who have promised their firstborn to separate witches have a child together? Do they both just pop up in the nursery and have a custody battle? I need a book
caressmelouis: is veronica safe? is she happy? is she warm does she need a blanket or some water or my firstborn
oxford-contra: Guys lets take a moment to remember that time my dad found a Tupac dollar. I’ll give you my firstborn for it
thatshowyoufeel: vardaesque: saevuswinds: vardaesque: you don’t understand i would sell my firstborn to know how this story started Well it all started when Mrs. Hayfer wanted me to babysit her dumb house. When I got the keys, I sat them on top
gwydionmisha: only-1-a: catphistopheles: writing-prompt-s: Years ago, you promised your firstborn to a witch. Since then, despite your best efforts, you can’t seem to get laid. The witch is starting to get pretty pissed. Y’all get together to
teaspellsandsecrets: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses: well maybe if adoption was more accessible to single parents and lesbian couples, witches wouldn’t have to go haggling for people’s firstborns This is one of my favorite posts on this website
guys dont ever drink ever because you will get a hangover and it fucking sucks
breakinq: my blog will make you smile ♡ im going to eat your firstborn child and the regurgitate it and feed it to a llama FUCKING STOP SELF PROMITING
cocobeef: LOOKIN CUTE IN THE MIRROR LIKE THEN IN THE PHOTO I’M ALL LIKE HACHACHACHA GIMME YOUR FIRSTBORN
