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“I enjoy my jumper collection, but I’d much rather have you on my body instead.”
“I knew it was dangerous getting you into crap telly. I should get you into my bed instead.”
“If your flatmate punched you in the face, I would kiss it better.”
“I named our dog Gladstone because you make me happy and hard.”
“Are we doing it? Have we done it?”
“I noticed you’re wearing a deerstalker. May I be your dear?”
“I’d let Angelo put a candle on our table.”
“I like your purple shirt. How’d you like to see my red pants?” (Thank you so much to andrisbiedrins for sending the screencap. I couldn’t find any images of Martin Freeman wearing red bottoms except as Arthur Dent, and apparently
“I’d let you hold my hand even if you kidnapped me and asked me to spy on my flatmate.”
“You make me so happy, I spray painted a smiley face on our wall.”
“Would you still love me even if I turned into an Asian woman?”
“You steeple your fingers a lot. I could give you something better to do with them.”
“On my face. Come at once, if convenient. If inconvenient, come anyway.”
“I don’t know what you might deduce about my brother’s heart, but I’ll gladly tell you about mine.”
“Forget tobacco ash. I’d rather blog two hundred and forty-three reasons why I love you.”
The cheesiest of the cheesy, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.
“I don’t smoke, don’t frequent cafes, don’t fuck men… You know, I make many exceptions when I’m around you.” Submitted by Viljatuuli (no username).
“You are the grape of my eye. Apples are boring.” Submitted by bandofbaskets.
“Without you, my heart feels as empty as my hearse.”
“How about we both skip your birthday dinner so I can show you my ‘thing’?”
“Only lies have detail, so I won’t elaborate on how much I love you.”
“I don’t need an essay about all my friends hating me to know that you love me the most.”
“You’re such a hot Guy, I would steal a motorcycle to get to you.”
“I have an international reputation for loving you.” Submitted by cricketshuman.
“Can our sign be the sign of threesome?”
“The ‘elephant in the room’ is my penis.”
“I don’t care how you fell in love with me… I want to know why.”
“Call me Shezza, because I’m going undercover… Under your covers, that is.”
“I want to do you on the table… On the Periodic Table hanging in your bedroom, that is.”
“I was so scared of you leaving me that I started doing napkin origami.”
“My love for you exceeds the amount of laptops Sherlock has.”
“Waltz lessons aren’t the only things that happen in Baker Street behind closed curtains.”
“Let’s be Oklahomos together.” (If you haven’t seen it yet…)
“Forget the limits– let’s all three dance.”
“If you married someone else, I would leave your wedding early.”
“I’d like to corrupt your ‘magnetic strip.’”
“Forget solving crimes– I could use you as an alternative to getting high.”
“The shooting last week isn’t the only reason you may have to restart my heart.”
“Undercover about my feelings for you? WELL I’M NOT NOW!”
Hey, followers! I hope you’re all having a wonderful Easter because I am having the worst Easter of my life and it is a goddamn miracle I was even able to put this comic together.
“Even if you told me that the Western world is run from a single house, I’d still want to talk about dinner.”
“The game is never over. I want to play with you forever.”
“Forget faking my genius… Want to see a different sort of magic trick?” Based on a suggestion by anonymous.
“I would jump out of a cake for you even if I wasn’t revealing that I faked my death.”
“I still love you even though your mustache doesn’t rub off.”
“The game is something, but you are everything.”
“My friendship isn’t the only thing that can give you warmth and constancy.”
“My love for you is #NotDead.” (Credit to shockingblankets for the hashtag, which LATER BECAME CANON.)
“I would love you even if you messed up my sock index.”
“I would disguise myself as a French waiter to stop you from proposing to someone else.”
“When I asked if you came for me, I didn’t just mean to the drug den.”
“We think you’re smoking, and that’s not just because we pulled you out of a bonfire.”
The best of The Empty Hearse, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.
The best of The Sign of Three, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.
“theimprobableone will use capital letters before I stop loving you.”
“If you left me, I’d do anything to get you Reichen-back.”
“You should come home with me instead. Your wife is AGRA-vating.”
“When you called me ‘nurse,’ were you really just making do, or were you trying to roleplay?”
“Will you be the Robin to my Hat-Man?”
“If I had only a minute and twenty-nine seconds left to live, I’d want to spend that time with you.”