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“You’re the king of my mind palace.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“I’m married to my work, so we’ll have to be discreet.” Requested by one of my real-life friends, who doesn’t have a Tumblr.
“You make my saliva coagulate.” Submitted by soiguessimhangingherenow.
“I wouldn’t put on pants for you.” Submitted by britishrandominsanity.
“I’d put my riding crop in your mortuary, if you catch my drift.” Submitted by andyouwere-barelyholdingon.
“Even if there weren’t snipers aiming at you, I’d still fall for you.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“Even if I was allergic to kittens, I would still cuddle you.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“When I said I was hoping you’d go deeper, I wasn’t talking about your analysis.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“When I say ‘Vatican Cameos!’ I want you to go down… on me.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“I would rather have you than the skull.” Submitted by anonymous.
“Do I have any ideas of what I’d like to do to you? Eight, so far.” Submitted by absolutelyhetero.
“Let me unwrap you like this mercury-laced candy.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“I like the turn-ups on your jeans. Wanna be my boy’s father?”
“Why do I need to know about the solar system? It’s wrong anyway; my world revolves around you.” Submitted by turtleplz.
“I love you more than John Watson loves jumpers.” Submitted by rightinthefangirl.
“When people call me a freak, they mean in bed.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“Are you holding my heart at gunpoint? Because I think I’m falling for you.” Submitted by anonymous.
“Forget the lipstick-matching present– let’s unwrap you.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“Don’t you want me on the floor too? And on the bed, and on the couch, and on the table, and against the wall…” Submitted by anonymous.
“Since you blew your nose on the lady from the train’s number, would you like mine instead?” Submitted by anonymous.
“Mrs. Turner has married ones. How about you and I be Mrs. Hudson’s married ones?”
“Well, I do believe that my pupils have dilated!” Submitted by crows-flight.
“Forget my sociopathy; you should do your research on my high-functioning penis.”
“I’d love to have a look around your top-secret areas.” Submitted (with photo) by cumberbitchsandwich.
“You’ve never been the most luminous of people, but you brighten up my world.” Submitted by anonymous.
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“Excuse me, but I couldn’t help but notice the state of your knees…” Submitted by absolutelyhetero.
“I love you more than John loves jam.” Submitted by xhowisharveywallbangeronewordx.
“Cerise isn’t the only thing that will drain you. You should see my purple shirt.” Submitted by Emily (no username).
“Science of Deduction? Wouldn’t you rather hear about the Science of Seduction?” Submitted by thesaphiragirl.
“Forget tobacco ash. I’d rather blog two hundred and forty-three reasons why I love you.”
“The Sign of 3? I prefer the Sign of <3”
“I’d let you ride my tube with your harpoon.” Submitted (with photo) by Carrie (no username). (Admin’s note: Yes, I realize this screencap has been used before, but it was a photo submission, so I just rolled with it.)
“Forget faking my genius… Want to see a different sort of magic trick?” Based on a suggestion by anonymous.
“I would murder a blackmailing newspaper proprietor for you.” Based on a suggestion by madspades.
“I would kick my parents out if you came over.”
“My love for you isn’t like Lord Moran’s bomb– it doesn’t have an off switch.”
“I cannot eliminate being with you, therefore it must not be impossible.”
The best of “Shezza,” from bbcsherlockpickuplines.
“You’re the only cabbie whose head is not the only thing I want to see.” Submitted by unicorn-enthusiast.
“Do you like solving crimes? Because I’ve got a vacancy.” Submitted by amylemoymoy.
“Sentiment is a chemical defect found in the losing side. I guess I’m a loser now.” Submitted by amylemoymoy.
“Judging by the turn-ups on your jeans, you’d be a pretty good father to my children.”Submitted by amylemoymoy.
“So, you say you’re on fire… Sounds like you need my hose.”Suggested by someone I know in real life, who doesn’t have a Tumblr and is too embarrassed to take credit for the idea anyway.
“I’d rip your clothes off in a darkened swimming pool even if people would talk.”Submitted by amylemoymoy.
“Mary’s bullet isn’t the only thing that should have penetrated me.”Based on a suggestion by jc-cumberbatch.
“A nice murder normally cheers me up, but it seems like you’ve brightened my day already.â€Submitted by amylemoymoy.
“You should pop ‘round to Baker Street. Who knows? Something might jump out of my pants.â€Submitted by amylemoymoy.
“It’s okay– you don’t have to wear makeup or a dress to compensate for the size of your mouth and breasts.â€Submitted by amylemoymoy.
“Don’t worry, I’m not like the cafe next door… I won’t be speedy.â€Suggested by someone I know in real life, who doesn’t have a Tumblr and is too embarrassed to take credit for the idea anyway.
“I don’t do anonymous clients, but for you I’ll make an exception.â€Submitted by mercyhouse.
“Unlike my coat, I just need one of you.â€Submitted by anonymous.
“When I said ‘the dog one,’ I wasn’t talking about your story. I was trying to think of the sex position.â€
“It was hard choosing between the two pills… But you’ve always been my first choice.â€Submitted by thats-what-people-brew.
“I put the D in Adler.â€Submitted by estrangedgearbox.
“Anderson, face the other way. You’re making me blush.â€Submitted by nzeuropean.
“Oscillation on the pavement means I love you.â€Submitted by nzeuropean.
“I don’t have friends, just potential love interests.â€Submitted by nzeuropean.
“You make me feel more alive than Moriarty’s ringtone.â€
“My love for you is even more enormous than 1880s Mycroft.â€
