i ha d to
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i ha d to clips
Your Reason To Be
shutupaubrey: hi can you direct me to the nearest hospital
It’s so nice that this horse is willing to share its earbuds with this little girl
mcisaacs: recent studies reveal that 100% of abortions are performed on women who do not wish to be pregnant and 0% of abortions are performed on conservative republican men
rickydillon: deletlng: kirschtein-be-bitchin: lots-of-pun: That is the question bee bee rock knot bee bee 2 bee ore not 2 bee how tf are you supposed to know that that lame rock is called ORE
eggito: coming out to your parents like
paradisaic: jocknotized: maxhockeyjock: “Hey, bro, you better get goin or you’re gonna be late to class.” “Class?” “Yeah bro. English class.” “I speak English bro. Don’t need no class on it.” “Dude
cooldadgang: “where are you planning on going to college?”
wigglytuffer: dropping hints to bae that ur ready
butttom: giggleshrug: so if the dates are all supposed to get fucked up zayn: forgets his walletharry: is aggressively bad at ice skatingliam: gets in a fight prob (one of the actors on set is a boxer SO…)louis: gets arrestedniall: ?????????? niall
schmoyoho: In which a children’s choir, grown-up choir, orchestra, dancing paper-mache-head Shia LaBeoufs, and aerialists perform a song about Shia LaBeouf’s gruesome cannibalistic nature TO SHIA LABEOUF. Thank goodness for the internet & thank
sir-hathaway: The Moon and the Sun could eclipse a thousand times over and there still wouldn’t be enough shade to encompass how deep this went.
themadship: sharkchunks: forevermealwayslovingyou: beardsbluntsbroncos: And the award for best use of that deer GIF ever goes to… Reblogging for the sake of that gif.
therobotmonster: kuroba101: prismatic-bell: HERE’S THE THING THOUGH I used to work for a call center and I was doing a political survey and I called this number that was randomly generated for me and the way our system worked was voice-activated
unsuccessfulmetalbenders: EVERY SINGLE EASTER MY MOTHER HIDES A THREE POUND EASTER EGG IN THE HOUSE AND SETS MY BROTHERS AND I OFF TO GO FIND IT AND GUESS WHO GOT IT FOR THE FOURTH CONSECUTIVE YEAR IN A ROW NOT THOSE LIL BITCHES
paradisaic: paradisaic: “Let’s go around the table and say one thing we’re thankful for” aka “whole family tries to 1 up whoever spoke last” “I’m thankful for our new puppy” “That’s nice Karen. Well,
precumming: welcome to hell motherfucker
bunsen: when even google can’t help u find the answer to ur homework
veggieblt: veggieblt: veggieblt: OH MY GOD I FUCKED UP SO BAD. I SAW THE CARDS AGAINST HUMANITY “BULLSHIT” SALE YESTERDAY AND BOUGHT IT THINKING IT WAS AN EXPANSION PACK. IT’S LITERALLY BULL SHIT. THEY ARE SENDING COW POOP TO MY HOUSE AND I HAVE
retiredjesus: how to sext
unsounded: How to open a beer with a banana
xerneas: claykaczmarek-y: i sent this photo to one of my friends with the caption ‘motherfuckin bubbles. you best envy me’ and all he did was reply with ‘ARE YOU NAKED????’ i was like, ‘what??????????no???’ ‘who the fuck takes
wearywithoutsleep: swarnpert: white lips, pale face, im gay, outer space #don’t know if I should sing this to A Team or Fairly Oddparents or Royals
aerical: adorableirwinning: Michael makes an unplanned appearance in an Annie/MasterCard commercial why the fuck is this so funny to me
littaly: bip-bop-bam: littaly: skellyscoo: paulsrockinpagoda: thatdarnwaffleopolis: Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Why are you saying “oh no” there’s a reason the condom was there. Would you rather whoever took it to go have unsafe sex? the pin
There is no point to this blog
urulokid: pittwo: dennys: he scream at own egg :V he whisper at own egg :v he scream at own racial bias lawsuits :V he scream at an article from 1994 in order to stir up shit and look edgy online when in reality denny’s incorporated sensitivity
strider-inquire: strider-inquire: ok but why is there such a stigma amongst straight guys on taking a girl wearing a suit to homecoming or prom? like have you seen a cute girl in a nice suit? if you think a guy dating a girl is gay then boy do i have
zealotarchaeologist: i stepped on the scale today and it said “bat” it took me a few seconds to realize it meant the battery was out, but before i realized that i just said “i am not a bat” out loud
casualhibiscus: My friend posted this the other day and I had to share it. Her cat looks so damn pleased with himself, it’s great.
pro-psychotic: My new years resolution is to not get the plague
sniffing: when u trying to take pic w dog and it bite U:/
juilan: Because a piece of gum told me to
pinkcookiedimples: How To Deal With Thirsty Mofos 101
avengersonna: stonerscully: laughhard: Just spent 10 minutes looking for my asshole cat… is there a cat in this picture i honest to god dont see it Holy
ghostrightsactivist: brainfreeze is my favorite pain response because it’s literally your body telling you to stop eating fucking snow, you jackass, what is wrong with you
hoespice-deactivated20180619: my dance style ranges from white dad at a barbecue to stripper whose rent is due tomorrow
blackriderstrikeshere: Listen I didn’t spend two orange sharpies to color all the yellow skittles for 15 notes
seite: and then they proceeded to be the worst at their jobs for the next 20 years
rednosedrobin: the year is 2023 17-year-old albus severus potter marches into the ministry of magic and legally changes his name to something that isnt so fucking stupid
coffeeandcockatiels: its-raditz: My favorite haiku that doesn’t really qualify as a haiku but I still like to call it a haiku 5,7,5 — Yes it does.
not-a-comedian: 12exe: Horton hears somebody he used to know do you ever regret drawing something
childservices: i try not to judge because thats gods job but sometimes he behind schedule
spookyphoque: stop for just one second. think about all the people you’ve secretly had a crush on. all the people you’ve found attractive, but never said anything to. every stranger you’ve temporarily fallen in love with on public transportation.
theonemillionthdragonborn: umyehs: fedorahatmatt: umyehs: breaking news: white cis boy drinks a can of monster energy drink, more at 11 breaking news: tumblr feminists continue to make jokes about cis white guys which in turn make them look exactly
thecakelessachiever:deliverusfromsburb:Imagine your OTP proposing repeatedly at different restaurants to get free food.#AND WHEN THE REAL PROPOSAL COMES AND THEY GET FREE ICE CREAM OR SOMETHING#PERSON A IS LIKE ‘omg that was a good one the whole speech
efftrinket: princeowl: listening to mumford and sons always makes me wish I was a horse #this is so abstract but somehow i understand
ghostrightsactivist: brainfreeze is my favorite pain response because it’s literally your body telling you to stop eating fucking snow, you stupid jackass, what is wrong with you
2012-2014 #BOYFRIENDS TO HUSBANDS
snapchatting: shaxaphone: snapchatting: be extra nice to people who don’t know what fisting is wait whats fisting you look beautiful today
ivysaaur:priceofliberty:hellabiafra: vegasmo: Human: “HAHAHA Animals are so dumb!” *goes to war with its own species, uses up all of its resources, destroys its own environment, pollutes its own air and water* Animal: *licks its own asshole* human:
joshgrofan: “I have to go. My ride’s here.”
alittlebitgayandmore: Shang’s journey to self discovery as told by me
harrysbroadshoulders: *slips into the lava* *tries to keep from going under* You: *turns temperature hotter* *burns up* *burns up* *for you baby*
daisy-ca:if someone refuses to use your preferred pronouns, give them a new namefor example, my mom calls me she so I’ve started calling her Carl
thingswedontneed:anus:off to a good startintimidation is key
risingoflights:I needed to laugh at this again.
sinaloan:pixistixrox:sinaloan:hey cis people stop reading this is for my trans folk only. you know that feel when you are being trans in a trans way because you are trans and ok the cis people have stopped reading by now. come to the fallen oak tree at
