darkfiretaimatsu
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darkfiretaimatsu: I guess not all earth ponies are full of physical power and endurance. That’s what I get for putting all of my points into dexterity~ I should’ve tried the kleenex-and-jerk technique, now that I think of it~ xD!
darkfiretaimatsu: And don’t even get me started on the feasibility of you doing so in a corrugated box. >w<
darkfiretaimatsu: I’m not guard material, either physically or motivationally. Following orders doesn’t suit a chaotic spirit, you know~? I’ll still help ponies out and protect them if I can, but not in any official capacity~ x3!
darkfiretaimatsu: Or, to put it another way, I’m exactly as strong or fast as I need to be for a particular joke to be funny~ My blog runs on comedy, not physics! Cece, you should take up a business in bush growing! Your ability to make them appear
darkfiretaimatsu: I promise you, it’s actually a pretty tasty sandwich. One of my favourites~! Besides, weird is good~ I can vouch for this, actually. You wouldn’t think it, but peanut butter and pickle sandwiches are surprisingly good. owo
darkfiretaimatsu: Every8ody has their favourites, I guess~ Sorry for, shall we say, trolling you, 8ut it just wasn’t a question day today~ Breaking my usual rule against Homesuck-related posts, but that Pinkie Tai is just too adorbs X3
darkfiretaimatsu: When the component parts are just as delicious as the full product, who can resist nipping into it early~? Frankly, you should see how many igloo blocks she can fit in her mouth~ x3!
darkfiretaimatsu: Lavalavalavalava! Now you’re speaking my language~ Don’t worry, the lava disappears when the lamp is stood upright. It also adds an awesome mood to any music player you set it near~ x3
darkfiretaimatsu: When this baby hits 88 miles per hour, you’re gonna see some serious suds~ All in all, it’s some good clean fun~ >w<!
darkfiretaimatsu: You guys have, like, indoor plumbing, right~? Awesome~ Yes, it’s canon~ No, it’s not a storyline. Think of it more as an excuse to appear in each other’s stories more~ XD! OMG I love it X3
darkfiretaimatsu: In fact, Toola, take it all. I really won’t miss it, and perhaps it’ll miss me for a change~ Bedlam’s in one of her “enchant the dishes” moods, you see… xD!
darkfiretaimatsu: Suffice it to say, I no longer have any money, much like Sugarcube Corner no longer has a roof! These incidents may or may not be related~ At least we got some soda out of the whole thing~ >w<!
darkfiretaimatsu: Anything you can do, I can fail at better~ I guess that’s lights out for this performance~ Love the socks, though~ >w<!
darkfiretaimatsu: Magic sure is mysterious. I don’t know how unicorns deal with it all the time~ Sometimes inexplicable things happen, Ms. Mist, please don’t be mad~ >w< Oh, Tai…
darkfiretaimatsu: “Anthro” is another word for “really tall”, right~? And if you need help researching, just ask. But I won’t solve it for you! Other folks’ stories should resolve of their own accord, not because somepony
darkfiretaimatsu: This much cuteness is probably lethal. I’d avoid it if I were you~ Somewhere, Bedlam is running around bare-legged! How scandalous~ X3!
darkfiretaimatsu: Ponyville’s kind of a land-locked city, you know? Not too many opportunities for sailing~ Come along, first mate Wuta! We be sailing for Sugarcube Corner’s plunder today~ >w<
darkfiretaimatsu: If I don’t get free stuff, it can’t be much of a holiday~ Wake me when it’s Nightmare Night again~ Oh Tai~ >w<
darkfiretaimatsu: Yet another gripping installment of the Terry Fleas saga~ I’m immune from the effects of the static myself, due to rubber socks~ X3
darkfiretaimatsu: Even if I don’t get it, I guess it’s not the worst holiday ever. Right, Arbor Day? I mean, why only celebrate hearts and hooves for a day? Why don’t other body parts get a day? Like brains. I know a very nice brain who totally
darkfiretaimatsu: Let your dreams soar. Sometimes you run into the most interesting folks~ She gave me foreknowledge about vertical ascention, but it continues to occur~ (Animation, as always, by the ineffable Trixingno~) X3!
darkfiretaimatsu: I dunno how I get myself into these sticky situations~ My socks are generally stuck on me forever anyway, so that’s not really a big concern to me. Latex is surprisingly durable~ xD
darkfiretaimatsu: Also, none of us can play instruments or have any musical talent whatsoever. Who knew you needed that to be a band~? I like your custom guitar there, though. What is that, a Flying B~? >w<!
darkfiretaimatsu: Yours is the Trixie hat that will pierce the heavens~! C’mon, the sooner you play along, the sooner you get your cape back~ X3!
darkfiretaimatsu: Do you want to play again, Ms. Turn Order? I think I have some Energy Cards I can add to my deck! …Ms. Turn Order? I don’t really play games. I just picked these up for the pretty pictures~ (PInkie Tai’s deck: B. Skull Dragon
darkfiretaimatsu: With praise like that, I’m gonna be glowing for at least a week~ ((And despite what Chrysalis implies, I assure you this was a very real message sent to me, because I have very kind and wonderful followers! I couldn’t do this without
darkfiretaimatsu: After all, what’s more zoologically dubious than a sharp-toothed pony~? If you want to summon me, try leaving a sandwich and soda unattended~ X3
darkfiretaimatsu: Let’s Just Ask Pinkie Tai~ turned 2 today! Wow, it’s been two whole years, guys. Two whole years of sharp teeth, soda guzzling, monster admiration, and latex socks. I’ve loved every minute of it~ When I first started, I didn’t
darkfiretaimatsu: Don’t worry, it turns out the fluff absorbed pretty much all of the impact, so she just rolled over and went back to sleep~ Darn movement-based vision! Like sharp teeth, it makes sense on predators, but not on me~ Meeps! xD
darkfiretaimatsu: They don’t usually have prizes inside this good anymore~ Part of this balanced breakfast, and maybe—if asked real nice—she could be part of this balanced cast of characters too~ x3! D'aww, lookit dat Trixie~! <3
darkfiretaimatsu: And for anypony not blessed with a tweedly piece in your hairstyle, I recommend using your tongue~ It’s almost as if some of the devices we used weren’t intended to be operated by creatures with hooves at all~ x3
darkfiretaimatsu: Seriously, is that the buzz going around? Beecause that’s just silly~ Think of it more like waterproof cotton candy! Or a soft-serve ice cream cone! That comes to a point, and the only thing you have to fear from it is a headache~
darkfiretaimatsu: If it’s not working, I’m probably going to look pretty silly~ But that’s okay, because everything is awesome. Even looking silly~! x3
darkfiretaimatsu: Don’t you see, Ms. Lola? Life itself is fun and silly, and thus so is everything else by extention~ Do I have to do a musical number about it~? Also, skyhooks. You never know when you’re gonna need a skyhook~ X3
darkfiretaimatsu: In fact, her ignorance is what makes her such a delicacy. Without a specific target, the love just flows out constantly. A renewable resource like that is very valuable. “Special somepony”? I dunno what that means, but I
darkfiretaimatsu: I’m not a show pony. I guess being judged for my looks negatively for so long makes me really uncomfortable even when it’s positive~ I’m much more comfortable doing the natural thing. You can paint over a monster mask, but it’s
darkfiretaimatsu: Everypony has a page in the Monster Manual somewhere, as they say~ A monster is only as monstrous as its actions, not its appearance~ Well that’s a good attitude to have :3
darkfiretaimatsu: And being technically correct is the best kind of correct, right, Twilight~? She really is the smartest pony I know, guys. I can only imagine what that’s like~ I’d trust her word on anything! For example, if I was smarter, maybe
darkfiretaimatsu: I wouldn’t say clothing is ponykind’s original sin, but I do find it very confining and uncomfortable! Besides, as I’ve said before, sharp-toothed ponies who live in the woods don’t get invited to galas~ The second panel has
darkfiretaimatsu: Also, boiling water is not something you want raining down on you. Just for reference~ Mind if I just lie down here for a while~? x3 Poor Tai~
darkfiretaimatsu: …Did you know there’s a graveyard just over the hill behind the castle? It’s… not related to the topic at hand, I thought you just might like to know about it~ Look, when I was a kid, nopony told me that raising the dead was
darkfiretaimatsu: Bestiaries and monster manuals and fiend folios are my favourite sort of thing! I can’t wait to see what kind of entries are in this new one~ My food budget’s gone, but who cares, I have a new book~ x3!
darkfiretaimatsu: Who is Bedlam? She’s my bestest friend, truest companion, and the pony who inspired me to be who I am today~ Who is Bedlam? She’s a unicorn made of living rubber and powered by chaos magic, who loves sweets and explosions~ Who is
darkfiretaimatsu: Oh, magical popcorn machine, what would I do without you~? If your appliances aren’t as big as you, maybe you’re doing something wrong~ x3 Oh Tai, so silly and adorable at the same time~ <3
darkfiretaimatsu: Sometimes it’s easier for me to understand monsters than it is my fellow ponies. I guess that’s what happens when you spend a lot of time alone while growing up~ I feel like this amusement park visit has gone completely off the
darkfiretaimatsu: No matter their size or physiology, never underestimate the baking power of princesses~ I guess this is technically what you would call a fishcake, eh~? x3!
darkfiretaimatsu: You don’t have to be thin to be delicious, mints! You should be whatever you feel comfortable being~ But in all honesty, I was always more of a fan of the peanut butter patties~ Yay mints~! <3
darkfiretaimatsu: Good thing the princess has such a sense of humour, or else accusations of being undead might not go so well~ But yes, there’s exceptions to every rule, and the longevity of sky princesses is well noted! And it’s not because she’s
darkfiretaimatsu: I assume that’s how it works, anyway. It makes the most sense if you think about it~ Of course, sometimes it doesn’t work perfectly. There might be a disease in the blood or a glitch in the machine, or maybe the loaf is just half-baked,
darkfiretaimatsu: asktrixingno: Dad: Are you a friend of the kids or am I being burgled right now? Hello! I found the box of cute robot ears~ x3!
darkfiretaimatsu: I know how to take care of books, Twi. But sometimes, you’re up late reading, you accidentally leave a slice of cake between the pages… I like books about monsters! Books that are monsters are much harder to read! X3
darkfiretaimatsu: I think it’d be a stretch to say I don’t want to be as close to folks as I can—emotionally and physically~ I mean, I shouldn’t have to bend over backwards to let you know you’re my friend, right~? …XD Damn, Tai. You
darkfiretaimatsu: That gravity’s gonna go far in this business, let me tell ya~ But really, when one of your roommate’s is a natural conduit for chaos magic, you get used to this sort of thing pretty quickly~ x3 Tai, you silly~
darkfiretaimatsu: Isn’t “love and tolerate” our manifesto, or town motto, or something? Why can’t we get along with the nice lactoses? If I see a chance to get along with a lactose, I will milk the opportunity for all it’s worth. I won’t
darkfiretaimatsu: Picking one thing over another is really hard! Especially several at a time, and then they just kind of blur together~ Are coffee squids superior to tea squids? Does the number of tentacles affect Force alignment? Do Sith take their
darkfiretaimatsu: I’m really glad you became a monochromatic Cool Spot recently. We wouldn’t have been able to do this when you were a silhouette man~ Win or lose, we did it together instead of competing! That’s my favourite way to play~ xD!
darkfiretaimatsu: Seriously, I thought it was part of her physiology! It sure looks like a weird changeling growth that queens have or something. A big dangly skull-plant! C’mon, I’m not alone on this, right, folks~? Also, it turns out climbing on
darkfiretaimatsu: Basically, my madness stems from isolation. As long as I have somepony to interact with, I’m fine and healthy~ Don’t think this screen’s gonna stop me if I need to interact with you, either~ Eep! XD D'aww, no worries, Tai. I
darkfiretaimatsu: Beep! I am an amazing robot and can answer many questions about robots and being a robot! Please put robot asks in our robot inbox, and I will gradually answer them as a robot! Robots! (1/10) x3
darkfiretaimatsu: Beep! I am a variant on the ethanol-powered robot! Rather than alcohol, I run on the chemical reaction of carbonation~ In addition to ethanol, some robots run on steam or magic! If you can power anything else with it, you can probably
