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mallowygoodness: I’m losing my shit I thought this was a parody account but its not
birkinbitch: itsstuckyinmyhead: Craig Mazin was Ted Cruz’s college roommate and he really really really hates him I’m dying because he got verified
TED CRUZ FOR HUMAN PRESIDENT
‘Run! Run And Never Look Back!’ Whispers Heidi Cruz While Hugging Carly Fiorina On Rally Stage
adulthoodisokay: awkward
Dun dun duuun!!!
wheezytumblr: edwardspoonhands: oatmeal: I wrote a letter to Ted Cruz explaining how Net Neutrality ACTUALLY works. Read the full thing here. GOD BLESS THE OATMEAL! I really like The Oatmeal and that he’s calling out Ted Cruz, however, his argument
wolfpratt:
selfie-scape: polysixx: rebel-in-tartan: oh my GOD It took me a while but I’m fucking SHRIEKING Zodiac killer on a caterpillar Thank you, I thought I was going to go insane and turn into a screaming Nicolas Cage trying to figure this out.
kafkamilktea: theinfinitebox: On February 26th, NPR posted this screenshot of the google search “ted cruz is”: “Is ted cruz the zodiac killer” is the second suggestion. Here is a screenshot from today (3/21): Nothing about the zodiac killer.
onlyblackgirl: alternativetrump: Remember that time Ted Cruz straight up said he’d murder Trump I just agree. never thought I’d say it but I miss Ted Cruz because he was that kinda diet right wing that isn’t completely fucking horrific
crowmemes: oak23: pattiluphone: seriousjones: ted cruz about to pull out a fucking gun actually, this is ted cruz emulating napoleon, foreshadowing that if elected, he will become a vicious war hungry imperialist dictator napoleon also is pulling
tedcruzthemarshmallowman: My name is Ted Cruzumaki and my dream is to become Hokage of the United States.
the-real-ted-cruz: kimksdiaperbooty: the-real-ted-cruz: TAKE 👏 MALE 👏 VICTIMS 👏 SERIOUSLY MALE 👏 VICTIMS 👏 ARE 👏 DISREGARDED 👏 BECAUSE 👏 OF 👏 PATRIARCHAL 👏 VALUES 👏 NOT 👏 FEMINISM WHERE👏DID👏I👏BRING👏UP👏FEMINISM👏MY👏GUY👏
the-real-ted-cruz: devotee-loyalty: the-real-ted-cruz: do you love the color of the sky? This goes against the Geneva Conventions and I will have your head for it are you referring to this?
radgoblin: the-real-ted-cruz: tactileintrovertedace: the-real-ted-cruz: sassytigercat: starsapphire: i raise you comic artists who can’t draw kids and offer you comic artists who absolutely cannot draw babies two words: medieval art This is
Ted Cruz is the Hash Slinging Slasher
memeufacturing: interviewer: thanks you for speaking with us, Ted ted cruz: No problem!interviewer *really fast*: SerialKillerSaysWhatted cruz: what?campaign manager: *screams*
miss-malaphor: bossypants: ‘ on so many levels
new blog @ roach-works
halfbloodhiccup: when-extremes-meet: Ted Cruz dropped out. Ted Cruz. Dropped out. Slow down and think about what this means. Donald Trump is your Republican nominee for the office of the President of the United States. Dear the rest of the world,
Ted Cruz explains the danger of Obama's scheme to regulate the internet
chocolatecakesandthickmilkshakes: The is Ted Cruz and he just threw his hat into the ring for a presidental bid in 2016. Ted Cruz was born in Canada do you think he’ll get all the shit Presdient Obama got? He better. It’s like they forget
chocolatecakesandthickmilkshakes: gregwuzhere: chocolatecakesandthickmilkshakes: The is Ted Cruz and he just threw his hat into the ring for a presidental bid in 2016. Ted Cruz was born in Canada do you think he’ll get all the shit Presdient Obama
gettindowntothisickbeat: grrrlproblems: kristenstewartsgirlfriend: pithy-partyy: babygirlaesthetic: deez–ovaries: splittingmyskin: scientificphilosopher: Republican presidential candidate Ted Cruz made this disgusting ‘joke’ at a recent
Ted Cruz is even worse than Trump: The Texas senator’s nihilism dwarfs the Donald’s
redrubied: birkinbitch: itsstuckyinmyhead: Craig Mazin was Ted Cruz’s college roommate and he really really really hates him I’m dying because he got verified There are more like him too. If from some miracle Ted Cruz wins the nomination, they
assijohnson: thebeautysupplystore: thebeautysupplystore: yall heard what ted cruz did at the RNC?! so ted cruz let the RNC believe that he was going to endorse trump then when he got on stage he said “vote with your conscience, look at the whole
e-v-roslyn: shipbot: astrodidact: What a piece of shit Ted Cruz is… did ted cruz just fucking use ‘Me, an Intellectual’ in a tweet Me, an informed observer: “Ted Cruz is a worthless jar of expired mayonnaise”
daisenseiben: the-real-ted-cruz: richard-hollabackgirl-nixon: the-real-ted-cruz: i love how unproblematic firefighters are. they just wanna put out the fires. I used to think that. that’s so ominous wtf did the firefighters do to you Firefighters
the-real-ted-cruz: loaffemscandal: the-real-ted-cruz: i met a real life canadian Tim Horton? no they were a person not an elephant, silly
natwidow: somebody needs to tell donald trump the internet thinks ted cruz is the zodiac killer bc trump would 100% take it to the next level he’d probably have ted cruz arrested and I for one think that would be hilarious to witness
🧸🔮🧸
ted cruz is the zodiac killer
thexfiles: stellasgibson: slaughterhousefive: Ted Cruz accidentally hitting his wife in the face not once but twice while dropping out of the Presidential race I can’t stop watching. i’m her ted cruz’s elbow is life
ted-cruz-is-the-zodiac-killer: It’s back!
just-shower-thoughts: The police probably conspired the ‘Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer’ meme so that the real killer would come forward to distance themselves from Ted Cruz.
Just voted today in the FL primary for Ted Cruz! No matter the party you are affiliated with let your voice be heard. Don’t let them decide for you. 🇺🇸🐘
Ted Cruz seems like the guy who would be president in a scary 1970s dystopian science fiction film.
bon-the-com: crowmemes: oak23: pattiluphone: seriousjones: ted cruz about to pull out a fucking gun actually, this is ted cruz emulating napoleon, foreshadowing that if elected, he will become a vicious war hungry imperialist dictator napoleon
beckettes: i see yr “ted cruz is the zodiac killer” theory and raise u a “ted cruz is literally every serial killer” theory.
scumbag-vanguard: mrswaylandworld: damnian-wayne: micdotcom: Yes, Ted Cruz actually said this on national TV — and then he brought up serial killers (!). I’m 330% here for the Zodiac Killer taking down Trump Do your thing Ted Ted Cruz redemption
