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tastefullyoffensive: Mind-Boggling Shower Thoughts, Part 5 (Part 4) (images via imgur)

There was this scene in a classic movie that stuck out to me as a kid—a character, preparing to give a toast, addresses four female characters and two male characters by saying “Now, does everyone have his cup?” I thought it

just-shower-thoughts: When you “bite down” on something, you’re actually “biting up” because you can’t move your top jaw. It’s okay to try to “bite down” now

just-shower-thoughts: Growing up, minesweeper taught me that no matter how good you are, some things just come down to luck.

just-shower-thoughts: Pizza isn’t cut into triangles. It’s cut into radians.

just-shower-thoughts: Im more picky about who i jerk off to, then who i would Bang.

just-shower-thoughts: If someone else caused you as much trouble as you cause yourself by procrastinating, that person would be your sworn enemy.

just-shower-thoughts: People always tell me not to use stereotypes against immigrants. They then go on to say that they are working hard and helping our country. They fail to realize that they are using a stereotype. Wow these are some shitty shower

just-shower-thoughts: I don’t know why I’m still surprised that Apple gets credit for features that have been out for years and then charges a ridiculous price that people will still pay

best-shower-thoughts:Some people are not an early bird or a night owl … they’re a permanently exhausted pigeon (source)

totallyjazzed: just-shower-thoughts: Even though they have no correlation whatsoever 7x7=49 and Thursday feel the exact same.

just-shower-thoughts: Children swear all the time. Adults swear all the time. However, mix these two groups, and suddenly everyone pretends swearing is awful and they would never ever do such thing.

just-shower-thoughts:I hate those really vivid dreams that you’re still emotionally attached to after you wake up. You’re stuck, feeling for something that technically doesn’t exist. i hate em too

just-shower-thoughts:I bet pilots silently judge each other’s landings whenever they fly as a passenger.

just-shower-thoughts:Saying that banning guns would cause people to use knives and trucks is like saying we shouldn’t cure cancer because some of the survivors would die from heart disease or car accidents.

just-shower-thoughts:Introverts don’t make friends, they get adopted by an extrovert

just-shower-thoughts:The best way to keep a population divided on an issue is to keep that issue controversial to talk about. If you can’t even talk about it there’s no way your going to be able to solve the problem.

just-shower-thoughts: I only have left two minutes to live, but that clock resets every time I take a breath.

just-shower-thoughts: The heavier a thing is, the harder it is to throw it far away. The lighter a thing is, the harder it is to throw it far away. Not exactly, light objects with poor aerodynamics are hard to throw because they don’t have to

just-shower-thoughts: At some point, we WILL possibly be able to download a car, due to the rise of 3D printers. Yeah, you’ll be able to download the car, but will you be able to put it together? If everyone prints their own car there’ll

just-shower-thoughts: Terry Crews would’ve been a way better Genie.

just-shower-thoughts: Ooo ahh hot hot

just-shower-thoughts: If you lose your left arm your right will be left and you’ll be all right.

just-shower-thoughts: Luke Skywalker defeated the Empire single handedly.

just-shower-thoughts: That Google Chrome “what tab is being noisy?” speaker icon should function as a mute button.

just-shower-thoughts: Security guards working at Samsung stores should be called Guardians of the Galaxy.

just-shower-thoughts: I’ve been using AdBlock for more than five years; I have no idea what the internet actually looks like.

just-shower-thoughts: Since our voices always sound cooler to ourselves than when on a recording, I can only imagine what Morgan Freeman sounds like to himself when he’s talking.

just-shower-thoughts: There should be a Sesame Street for adults, where complex/difficult concepts, like trigonometry or arbitration vs. going to court/trial, are broken down and explained by puppets.

just-shower-thoughts: Art is how we decorate space; music is how we decorate time.

just-shower-thoughts: If you don’t have enough money for a tip, you don’t have enough money to order delivery.

just-shower-thoughts: I wonder if in 50-60 years there will be TV-Shows like Boardwalk Empire,which take place during the “marijuana-prohibition”.

just-shower-thoughts: In Pacific Rim, the humans defeated the Kaiju with a Jäeger bomb.

just-shower-thoughts: Many of us will be the last people in the course of human history to have experienced life without computers and Internet.

just-shower-thoughts: If everyone is always thinking outside the box, wouldn’t thinking inside the box really be thinking outside the box?

just-shower-thoughts: You know you’re an adult when you finally understand why it would be so exciting to win a brand new bedroom set on Price is Right.

just-shower-thoughts: Cyber Monday is the perfect day to unsubscribe from all unwanted marketing emails because you’ll be emailed by every single one of them.

just-shower-thoughts: Blunt can mean straight to the point, however there are no points on blunt objects.

just-shower-thoughts: If you make a killing you make a lot of money. If you make a living you make enough to get by.

just-shower-thoughts: Learning to code has totally fucked my google search history. For example, “Do you fork a child before or after you kill the parent?”

just-shower-thoughts: I wonder how many item features I don’t know about because I have never read a instruction manual for anything.

just-shower-thoughts: I check Facebook like I check my fridge: returning every few minutes only to be disappointed, and leaving.

ohheyitsshanaj: anarchyinblack: just-shower-thoughts: All churches should be homeless shelters at night Good thing the government is here to keep us safe from giving people shelter

just-shower-thoughts: Someone way uglier than you has gotten laid way more than you

just-shower-thoughts: What if genies were real until somebody wished them out of existence? geniecide

just-shower-thoughts:When you say “crisp”, it starts from the back of your mouth and moves to the front.

just-shower-thoughts: I wish we had the ability to dream together with other people. Like multi-player dreaming.

just-shower-thoughts:What if deja vu was actually the feeling you get when a bunch of different timelines of your being are doing the same thing?

just-shower-thoughts:A different version of you exists in the minds of everyone who know who you are.

just-shower-thoughts:People with anxiety are basically way too aware of being alive

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