my fucking parents
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My sister and I have always been very competitive and we bet on everything, including who would loose their virginity first and who would be the first to seduce one of our parents. Since she now regularly fucks Dad and I regularly fuck Mom, our latest
My brother and I share a bathroom on the other side of the house from my parents and we meet there every morning to fuck either before or during our showers.
my parents fucking lied talking to strangers on the internet was the best decision of my life
My parents are so pissed that I might be teaching in an urban area Jesus fucking Christ I forgot how our right racist my parents are.
my-parents-can-never-know: grab my hips and fuck me as hard as you want
ryanvallejo: my-pj-pants: thatfunnyblog: WAIT A SECOND HE IS EVERYTHING GOOD IN THE WORLD HE IS MIGHTY VERSATILE patchy could have met spongebob… if he looked within himself fuck
guns-n-broses:missveryvery:same guy who said thishe’s my fucking heroas a kid he was made fun of for being adopted, and just replied that his parents chose him, while theirs were stuck with them
My parents are on the same exact fucked up sleep schedule I’m on. I no longer have any real time to do anything while they’re asleep. It seems whenever I do anyt u in that makes noise my dad is interrupts me in a demanding manner asking me
my parents fucking lied talking to strangers on the internet was like the best decision of my life
levis-bum: melissamceagle: do you think anime parents have a baby and when they see she has pink hair and blue eyes they just think “oh no she’s a main character.” this post changed my fucking llife
wealwaysbreathe: sexrumors: trying to bang with ur boo while ur parent in the other room OH MY FUCKINg GOD
i lied to my parents and said i felt too shitty to go to school but in reality i just didn’t want to read the chapter i had a test on today wow i’m an actual piece of shit.
mysoulisinorbit: jemmasimmns: please don’t make people with depression feel guilty for their lack of interest in things or their inability to motivate themselves please and thank you goodbye on that note, please don’t make people with anxiety
meloetta: do you ever see a girl so pretty you just want to like… reconsider your lifestyle… take up a healthy steady diet… become a more financially successful person… call your parents and thank them for bringing you into this world during
fuck-benedict: fuck-benedict: OH MY GOD MY PARENTS JUST TOLD ME THE STORY OF HOW THEY STARTED DATING ok so they worked together in a town called abbotsford and my father had a crush on my mother and one day he asked her “nice bum where ya from”
melissamceagle: sassybatterie: levis-bum: melissamceagle: do you think anime parents have a baby and when they see she has pink hair and blue eyes they just think “oh no she’s a main character.” this post changed my fucking llife oh
daddyworship: filthybrutalkink: Trained on Dad’s cock since he was yea-big. Knows how to service a man. Good fucken boy. And good fucking parenting. I’ve never seen this, one of my FAVORITE PICS… in black n white!!!! The stud in the hat looks
cunttacular: cali01: cunttacular: Why the fuck don’t I have a fairly odd parent? Maybe you did but you didn’t need them anymore, so they erased your memory like they normally would. Mindfuck
bestpresidentna: bill-11b: Oh. My. Fuck. This is one of those things you do as a parent bc ur an asshole and know that your kid doesn’t know any better and you know that like fine wine this is only going to get funnier with age, like a great big
If I realllllllly think about it…. I have nothing to complain about. I live a very comfortable fortunate life. I don’t contribute anything. I clean and cook. Big fucking deal. I don’t get why all my shit seems to be flying all over
robot: all i asked you to do was close my fucking door parents
Fuck why does so much of what we discuss keep coming back to this same damn issue. I hate it. I know why. I just hate it. And yes, it’s because I am afraid to talk to my parents. Namely my stepdad who says its hormones/ because I stopped going to church/
Never fucking settle. I can’t stress this enough. In my 21 years of life, I want this to be the one thing that I have learned better than all other lessons. If a boy asks if you are okay, knowing that you are not, and leaves it alone when you say “yes”
Fucking hate this loud as thunderstorm while my parents are trying to help me prep for my moving tomorrow. The walls are literally vibrating with some of the thunder. I just want stillness. I want my parents to be still and not going through my stuff
bohemianrhapsodomy: isitmadness: nearlydrowning: youvebeen-loki-d: Requested by anon: All my “Bad Parenting Odin” memes CRYING BOTH OF YOU WERE BORN TO BE KINGS EXCEPT YOU LOKI I AM DYING FUCK YOU SANTA
sassybatterie: levis-bum: melissamceagle: do you think anime parents have a baby and when they see she has pink hair and blue eyes they just think “oh no she’s a main character.” this post changed my fucking llife
meechonmars: meechonmars: when adults apologize for cussing in front of you captioned-vinesParent: WHAT THE FUCK!Parent: Oh excuse my language babyMeech: *looks*…. oh bitch its alright i be cussing all the muthafucking time
angelbabyspice: bestpresidentna: bill-11b: Oh. My. Fuck. This is one of those things you do as a parent bc ur an asshole and know that your kid doesn’t know any better and you know that like fine wine this is only going to get funnier with age,
Fuck fuckity fuck fuck rawr i hate having to deal with other people namely my parents like fuck just let me do what i want i dont care about myself and its a tricky situation so just let her come over when she wants
My parents have been asking if I’m gonna celebrate my birthday and im like with who I have no fucking friends
s-shutup-its-not-like-i-actually: grandtheft-autotune: sting-rae11: Okay no. This shit is so fucking satisfying. I can not tell you the joy it brings me when an underage kid tries to buy GTA and when I tell them they need a parent, they go get said
cherryseltzer: to all my fat friends who are going to have to endure weird body comments from their family tomorrow: i love you and you’re perfect and i’m your parents/aunts/uncles/siblings/cousins now.
dirtylittledamsel: when my parents introduce me to new people
ruinedchildhood: When my parents have guests over and I need to get to the kitchen
httpgogh: honestly birthdays were so easy when i was younger like i just wanted toys and stuff like that but now? my parents r like “wht do u want” and im just like??? some self esteem?? emotional stability?? a hobby??
serein-brain: hellyeahthomassanders: I Shall Be a Strict Dad 👨🏻 by Thomas Sanders This has literally been my entire plan for if I become a parent.
theneckstroke: theneckstroke: reblog with the tv show ur parents wouldn’t let u watch when u were younger in the tags i’ll start mine was married…with children @ literally everyone reblogging this post what the FUCK was happening on ed, edd, &
thecringeandwincefactory: nentuaby: original: https://twitter.com/Manda_like_wine/status/977299937963765761 My god this is applicable to so many situations: this is in no way a WE situation.
myresin: guns-n-broses:missveryvery:same guy who said thishe’s my fucking hero as a kid he was made fun of for being adopted, and just replied that his parents chose him, while theirs were stuck with them Boss
king-owl: tentaclerapper: methylbenzene: when i was little and my parents were driving id pretend there was a man/being/thing running alongside the car who had to follow certain rules like “he can only travel by jumping from streetlight to streetlight”
wealwaysbreathe:sexrumors:trying to bang with ur boo while ur parent in the other roomOH MY FUCKINg GOD
My parents are just casually drinking a bottle of wine and looking through their wills like estimating when they’re going to die what the actual fuck stop getting drunk and talking about death you fucking weirdos
Oh another note, the new Chloe episode of we bare bears was cute as fuck and heartbreaking at the same time anD I LOVED IT
My parents fucked up…. the car they bought me…. The title to the car is in MY name so therefore neither of them can legally take my car (like they threatened to do). Hahaha this makes me so happy. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA suckers 😂
