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“Be the Mrs. Hudson to my skull. By which I mean I want you to take me.” Submitted by deeppuddles.

“Be the Mrs. Hudson to my skull. By which I mean I want you to take me.” Submitted by deeppuddles.

“My hip isn’t the only thing about me that’s bad. Let me show you how naughty I can be.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“My hip isn’t the only thing about me that’s bad. Let me show you how naughty I can be.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“Who cares about decent? I am turned on!”

“Who cares about decent? I am turned on!”

“Want to see what else I keep hidden in my bra?”

“Want to see what else I keep hidden in my bra?”

“England would fall if you left me.”

“England would fall if you left me.”

“Mrs. Hudson, are you trying to seduce me?”

“Mrs. Hudson, are you trying to seduce me?”

“I’ve been lonely ever since you ensured my husband’s execution.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“I’ve been lonely ever since you ensured my husband’s execution.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“Mrs. Turner has married ones. How about you and I be Mrs. Hudson’s married ones?”

“Mrs. Turner has married ones. How about you and I be Mrs. Hudson’s married ones?”

“The fridge? Please, I know a better place for you to put your fingers.”

“The fridge? Please, I know a better place for you to put your fingers.”

“It would be the end of the world to me if your landlady were to cockblock us.”

“It would be the end of the world to me if your landlady were to cockblock us.”

xxx tumblr

xxx tumblr

“If you think cerise drains you, you should see how exhausted I could make you.”

“If you think cerise drains you, you should see how exhausted I could make you.”

“Don’t worry if I shout ‘Damn my leg!’ My third leg is still perfectly functional.”

“Don’t worry if I shout ‘Damn my leg!’ My third leg is still perfectly functional.”

“Cerise isn’t the only thing that will drain you. You should see my purple shirt.” Submitted by Emily (no username).

“Cerise isn’t the only thing that will drain you. You should see my purple shirt.” Submitted by Emily (no username).

“Mrs. Hudson may have stolen my skull, but you have stolen my heart.”

“Mrs. Hudson may have stolen my skull, but you have stolen my heart.”

“I would ensure your husband’s death in Florida just to be with you.”

“I would ensure your husband’s death in Florida just to be with you.”

“You’re my popular choice at the moment, dear.”

“You’re my popular choice at the moment, dear.”

“The things we’d like to do to you… I have a list. Mycroft has a file.”

“The things we’d like to do to you… I have a list. Mycroft has a file.”

“You don’t need to YouTube to see my exotic dancing.”

“You don’t need to YouTube to see my exotic dancing.”

“I’ll be your housekeeper… Maybe I’ll exotic dance for you too.” Submitted by anonymous.

“I’ll be your housekeeper… Maybe I’ll exotic dance for you too.” Submitted by anonymous.

Wedding versus stag night. (These aren’t based on number of notes or anything– this is just your admin having fun.)

Wedding versus stag night. (These aren’t based on number of notes or anything– this is just your admin having fun.)

“I’m not your housekeeper. The only thing of yours I want to keep is your love.”

“I’m not your housekeeper. The only thing of yours I want to keep is your love.”

“Without you, my heart is as broken as Mrs. Hudson’s hip.”

“Without you, my heart is as broken as Mrs. Hudson’s hip.”

“I would love you even if you made post-mortem jokes about my hip.”

“I would love you even if you made post-mortem jokes about my hip.”

“I would share my ‘herbal soothers’ with you.”

“I would share my ‘herbal soothers’ with you.”

“You don’t need Connie Prince. You’re already the most beautiful thing in the world.”

“You don’t need Connie Prince. You’re already the most beautiful thing in the world.”

“It’s a bit rude that noise, isn’t it? Not that that’ll stop me from coaxing it out of you.”

“It’s a bit rude that noise, isn’t it? Not that that’ll stop me from coaxing it out of you.”

“I wish I was Irene’s phone just so I could get into your cleavage.”

“I wish I was Irene’s phone just so I could get into your cleavage.”

Happy new year, Tumblr! Hope it’s not meretricious ;) I made this late at night so it might not be funny now, but I dunno– I think the world might actually be a better place with Mrs. Hudson ruling it.

Happy new year, Tumblr! Hope it’s not meretricious ;) I made this late at night so it might not be funny now, but I dunno– I think the world might actually be a better place with Mrs. Hudson ruling it.

“Let’s get on your laptop and look at something other than John’s blog.”

“Let’s get on your laptop and look at something other than John’s blog.”

“I ship us like Mrs. Hudson ships Johnlock.”Based on a suggestion by amylemoymoy.

“I ship us like Mrs. Hudson ships Johnlock.”Based on a suggestion by amylemoymoy.

“The skull on the mantle isn’t the only bone I’d like to take.”

“The skull on the mantle isn’t the only bone I’d like to take.”

“You are more eloquent than dust.”

“You are more eloquent than dust.”

“Me wearing antlers is best left to the imagination, but me wearing nothing at all is a must-see.”

“Me wearing antlers is best left to the imagination, but me wearing nothing at all is a must-see.”

“Your mustache ages you… Good thing I like older men.”

“Your mustache ages you… Good thing I like older men.”

“I’m sorry I let it all slide… How about banging something other than my tea on the table?”

“I’m sorry I let it all slide… How about banging something other than my tea on the table?”

“A nice murder normally cheers me up, but it seems like you’ve brightened my day already.”Submitted by amylemoymoy.

“A nice murder normally cheers me up, but it seems like you’ve brightened my day already.”Submitted by amylemoymoy.

The top pick-up lines from every major character who’s appeared in more than one season, (based on number of notes).Thank you guys so much for 50,000 followers!!!!! <3

The top pick-up lines from every major character who’s appeared in more than one season, (based on number of notes).Thank you guys so much for 50,000 followers!!!!! <3

“Mrs. Hudson offered me a cup of tea, but I’d much rather have a drink of you.”

“Mrs. Hudson offered me a cup of tea, but I’d much rather have a drink of you.”

“If you think the illustrator’s out of control, you should see me in the bedroom.”

“If you think the illustrator’s out of control, you should see me in the bedroom.”

“Broadly speaking, I’d like to have a ‘function’ in your ‘narrative.’“

“Broadly speaking, I’d like to have a ‘function’ in your ‘narrative.’“

“I’m not a plot device… The only function I want in your narrative is love interest.”

“I’m not a plot device… The only function I want in your narrative is love interest.”

“You’re more hip than the body part Mrs. Hudson needs herbal soothers for.”

“You’re more hip than the body part Mrs. Hudson needs herbal soothers for.”

“I’m not your housekeeper, but I’ll gladly be your housewife.”

“I’m not your housekeeper, but I’ll gladly be your housewife.”

“I would half kill a man because he laid a finger on you.”

“I would half kill a man because he laid a finger on you.”

“Are you Mrs. Hudson’s cooking? Because I want you inside of me.”

“Are you Mrs. Hudson’s cooking? Because I want you inside of me.”

“If I was Speedy’s Cafe, I would let you eat me out any time on the house.”Based on a suggestion by @sarahsarahsarahsarahsarah.

“If I was Speedy’s Cafe, I would let you eat me out any time on the house.”Based on a suggestion by @sarahsarahsarahsarahsarah.

“Ignore the illustrator. You’re so unforgettable, I would recognize you with or without a mustache.”

“Ignore the illustrator. You’re so unforgettable, I would recognize you with or without a mustache.”

“Forget literary criticism by means of satire. I won’t be talking because my mouth will be preoccupied.”

“Forget literary criticism by means of satire. I won’t be talking because my mouth will be preoccupied.”

“Are you Mrs. Hudson? Because I need to give you more lines… More pick-up lines, that is.”(This one got a bit meta, haha.)

“Are you Mrs. Hudson? Because I need to give you more lines… More pick-up lines, that is.”(This one got a bit meta, haha.)

“If you were 221b, I would never let the illustrator make you drab and dingy.”

“If you were 221b, I would never let the illustrator make you drab and dingy.”

“If you were one of the reporters outside, I would do so much more than just make tea for you.”

“If you were one of the reporters outside, I would do so much more than just make tea for you.”

“I would let you in my house even if you were a reptile.”

“I would let you in my house even if you were a reptile.”

“Are you Mrs. Hudson’s car? Because I wanna take you for a ride.”

“Are you Mrs. Hudson’s car? Because I wanna take you for a ride.”

“You can borrow my handcuffs in the salad drawer anytime… But only if you use them with me.”

“You can borrow my handcuffs in the salad drawer anytime… But only if you use them with me.”

“Yes, I am having an earthquake. You shake up my world.”

“Yes, I am having an earthquake. You shake up my world.”

“I fell for you faster than Mrs. Hudson can drive.”

“I fell for you faster than Mrs. Hudson can drive.”

The best of The Lying Detective pick-up lines, based on number of notes.

The best of The Lying Detective pick-up lines, based on number of notes.

The best of Mrs. Hudson pick-up lines, based on number of notes.

The best of Mrs. Hudson pick-up lines, based on number of notes.

ibelieveinmycroft: Anonymous asked you: So, in Scandal, we see Mycroft telling Mrs. Hudson to shut up, and after Sherlock yells at him and he gets looks from Mrs. Hudson, John, and Sherlock, she (Mrs. Hudson) says something along the lines of, ‘after

ibelieveinmycroft: Anonymous asked you: So, in Scandal, we see Mycroft telling Mrs. Hudson to shut up, and after Sherlock yells at him and he gets looks from Mrs. Hudson, John, and Sherlock, she (Mrs. Hudson) says something along the lines of, ‘after

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