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“I heard you want the D… and I’m not talking about deductions.”

“I heard you want the D… and I’m not talking about deductions.”

“Forget the crime scene… The only body I want to be checking out is yours.”

“Forget the crime scene… The only body I want to be checking out is yours.”

“You could make me feel alive even if I were one of Molly’s cadavers.” Based on a suggestion by madspades.

“You could make me feel alive even if I were one of Molly’s cadavers.” Based on a suggestion by madspades.

“I’d let a strange woman abduct me as long as she was taking me to you.”

“I’d let a strange woman abduct me as long as she was taking me to you.”

“Wanna see my secret tattoo?”

“Wanna see my secret tattoo?”

“Lestrade? More like Lust-rade.”

“Lestrade? More like Lust-rade.”

Merry Christmas (or whatever you celebrate), Tumblr! Here is the source for the “missile toe” image.

Merry Christmas (or whatever you celebrate), Tumblr! Here is the source for the “missile toe” image.

Pick-up lines involving lyrics, song titles, or bands – from bbcsherlockpickuplines.

Pick-up lines involving lyrics, song titles, or bands – from bbcsherlockpickuplines.

Happy new year, Tumblr! Hope it’s not meretricious ;) I made this late at night so it might not be funny now, but I dunno– I think the world might actually be a better place with Mrs. Hudson ruling it.

Happy new year, Tumblr! Hope it’s not meretricious ;) I made this late at night so it might not be funny now, but I dunno– I think the world might actually be a better place with Mrs. Hudson ruling it.

The top 10 pick-up lines of 2014. Happy new year from bbcsherlockpickuplines!

The top 10 pick-up lines of 2014. Happy new year from bbcsherlockpickuplines!

“I’m not just a soldier, doctor, and blogger… I’m also a lover.”

“I’m not just a soldier, doctor, and blogger… I’m also a lover.”

“Are you Mary Morstan? Because those pants look so good on you, you’re putting the ass in assassin… twice.”

“Are you Mary Morstan? Because those pants look so good on you, you’re putting the ass in assassin… twice.”

“My mind palace can’t even contain how much I think about you.”

“My mind palace can’t even contain how much I think about you.”

“I ship us like Mrs. Hudson ships Johnlock.”Based on a suggestion by amylemoymoy.

“I ship us like Mrs. Hudson ships Johnlock.”Based on a suggestion by amylemoymoy.

“I’d love your mind even if it wasn’t a palace.”

“I’d love your mind even if it wasn’t a palace.”

Happy Valentine’s Day, followers! My love for you all is… immortal ;)

Happy Valentine’s Day, followers! My love for you all is… immortal ;)

“I would let you play me like Sherlock plays the violin.”

“I would let you play me like Sherlock plays the violin.”

“I’m so glad I’m not Mycroft… I would never go on a diet if I had to give up something as sweet as you.”

“I’m so glad I’m not Mycroft… I would never go on a diet if I had to give up something as sweet as you.”

“May I be the umbrella to your Mycroft? I want you to take me with you everywhere you go.”

“May I be the umbrella to your Mycroft? I want you to take me with you everywhere you go.”

“I may be from the Fifth Northumberland Fusiliers, but that doesn’t mean I won’t wander south when I touch you.”

“I may be from the Fifth Northumberland Fusiliers, but that doesn’t mean I won’t wander south when I touch you.”

“Don’t worry, I’m not like the cafe next door… I won’t be speedy.”Suggested by someone I know in real life, who doesn’t have a Tumblr and is too embarrassed to take credit for the idea anyway.

“Don’t worry, I’m not like the cafe next door… I won’t be speedy.”Suggested by someone I know in real life, who doesn’t have a Tumblr and is too embarrassed to take credit for the idea anyway.

“Are you a Holmes brother? Because you are smoking.”

“Are you a Holmes brother? Because you are smoking.”

“I heard you said you wanted to ‘do Molly’… I hope you didn’t mean the drug.”

“I heard you said you wanted to ‘do Molly’… I hope you didn’t mean the drug.”

“Your face is more perfectly sculpted than Moriarty’s eyebrows.”

“Your face is more perfectly sculpted than Moriarty’s eyebrows.”

“I love you more than Mycroft loves his umbrella.”

“I love you more than Mycroft loves his umbrella.”

xxx tumblr

xxx tumblr

“Your teeth are whiter than Molly’s lab coat.”

“Your teeth are whiter than Molly’s lab coat.”

“Are you Anderson? Because I want to ‘Phillip’ your hole with my cock.”

“Are you Anderson? Because I want to ‘Phillip’ your hole with my cock.”

“Mrs. Hudson offered me a cup of tea, but I’d much rather have a drink of you.”

“Mrs. Hudson offered me a cup of tea, but I’d much rather have a drink of you.”

“My shirt buttons may strain to get away from me, but I bet you won’t.”

“My shirt buttons may strain to get away from me, but I bet you won’t.”

“My dick is harder than one of Sherlock’s unsolved cases.”

“My dick is harder than one of Sherlock’s unsolved cases.”

“The handle of my umbrella isn’t the only thing I have that’s ribbed.”

“The handle of my umbrella isn’t the only thing I have that’s ribbed.”

“Wanna come to my Mori-party?”

“Wanna come to my Mori-party?”

“I bet I can find your G spot quicker than Sherlock finds clues.”

“I bet I can find your G spot quicker than Sherlock finds clues.”

“Sherlock can survive without food easier than I can survive without you.”

“Sherlock can survive without food easier than I can survive without you.”

“I know you like to hold your umbrella all the time, but I wish you would hold my hand instead.”

“I know you like to hold your umbrella all the time, but I wish you would hold my hand instead.”

“Why have Lestrade when you can have More-trade?”

“Why have Lestrade when you can have More-trade?”

“I put the D in Adler.”Submitted by estrangedgearbox.

“I put the D in Adler.”Submitted by estrangedgearbox.

“Will you be the cigarette to my Sherlock? I want to put my lips around you.”

“Will you be the cigarette to my Sherlock? I want to put my lips around you.”

“Graham, Gavin, Geoff… I can be whoever you want me to be.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“Graham, Gavin, Geoff… I can be whoever you want me to be.”Submitted by nzeuropean.

“Your style is more iconic than Sherlock in a deerstalker.”

“Your style is more iconic than Sherlock in a deerstalker.”

“The game is on. Will you be my player 2?”

“The game is on. Will you be my player 2?”

“My coat collar isn’t the only thing that’s up.”

“My coat collar isn’t the only thing that’s up.”

“I must be 221b’s wallpaper, because you’re making me smile.”

“I must be 221b’s wallpaper, because you’re making me smile.”

“I don’t just want the D… I want the D.I.”

“I don’t just want the D… I want the D.I.”

“We can’t eat in the kitchen because Sherlock keeps experiments in it. Shall I take you out to dinner instead?”

“We can’t eat in the kitchen because Sherlock keeps experiments in it. Shall I take you out to dinner instead?”

“I’m not your housekeeper, but I’ll gladly be your housewife.”

“I’m not your housekeeper, but I’ll gladly be your housewife.”

“Is your name Lestrade? Because your hair may be silver, but your heart is pure gold.”

“Is your name Lestrade? Because your hair may be silver, but your heart is pure gold.”

“If I had an unsolved murder for every time I thought of you, I’d be Scotland Yard without Sherlock.”

“If I had an unsolved murder for every time I thought of you, I’d be Scotland Yard without Sherlock.”

“I could deduce everything about you, but I’d much rather you tell me about yourself.”

“I could deduce everything about you, but I’d much rather you tell me about yourself.”

“My bed is cozier than John’s jumpers. Don’t believe me? Come see for yourself.”

“My bed is cozier than John’s jumpers. Don’t believe me? Come see for yourself.”

“My love for you is deeper than Sherlock’s voice.”

“My love for you is deeper than Sherlock’s voice.”

“Is your name Mycroft Holmes? Because I need a little ginger to spice up my life.”

“Is your name Mycroft Holmes? Because I need a little ginger to spice up my life.”

“Will you be the experiment to my Sherlock? I want to do you in the kitchen.”

“Will you be the experiment to my Sherlock? I want to do you in the kitchen.”

“Are you Mrs. Hudson’s cooking? Because I want you inside of me.”

“Are you Mrs. Hudson’s cooking? Because I want you inside of me.”

“If I was Speedy’s Cafe, I would let you eat me out any time on the house.”Based on a suggestion by @sarahsarahsarahsarahsarah.

“If I was Speedy’s Cafe, I would let you eat me out any time on the house.”Based on a suggestion by @sarahsarahsarahsarahsarah.

“If you were Sherlock’s veins, I would be cocaine just so I could get inside of you.”

“If you were Sherlock’s veins, I would be cocaine just so I could get inside of you.”

“Are you Sherlock Holmes? Because I wanna see you shake your mind pal-ass.”

“Are you Sherlock Holmes? Because I wanna see you shake your mind pal-ass.”

“Are you my fridge? Because I want to stick my body parts in you.”

“Are you my fridge? Because I want to stick my body parts in you.”

“I usually make clients sit in The Chair, but you can sit on my face if you’d prefer.”

“I usually make clients sit in The Chair, but you can sit on my face if you’d prefer.”

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