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“Wanna U.M.Q.R.A.?”

“Wanna U.M.Q.R.A.?”

“Just give me a chance and I’ll be Reichen your bed Bach and forth all night.” Submitted by turtleplz.

“Just give me a chance and I’ll be Reichen your bed Bach and forth all night.” Submitted by turtleplz.

“Let’s REALLY make people talk.” Submitted by anonymous.

“Let’s REALLY make people talk.” Submitted by anonymous.

“I always hear ‘kiss me on the mouth’ when you’re speaking, but it’s usually subtext.” Submitted by imadeyousomeshoes.

“I always hear ‘kiss me on the mouth’ when you’re speaking, but it’s usually subtext.” Submitted by imadeyousomeshoes.

“I always hear ‘sit on my face’ when you’re speaking, but it’s usually subtext.” Submitted by verity-burns.

“I always hear ‘sit on my face’ when you’re speaking, but it’s usually subtext.” Submitted by verity-burns.

“I’ve never been jealous of a shirt before.” Submitted by insertpoeticdevice.

“I’ve never been jealous of a shirt before.” Submitted by insertpoeticdevice.

“I love you so much, I promise to avoid your nose and teeth whenever I punch your face.”

“I love you so much, I promise to avoid your nose and teeth whenever I punch your face.”

“I’ll help you excrete the drug out of your system.” Submitted by maskedcity.

“I’ll help you excrete the drug out of your system.” Submitted by maskedcity.

“I know a man… And I am what he likes.” Submitted by Raj (no username).

“I know a man… And I am what he likes.” Submitted by Raj (no username).

“Rank isn’t the only thing I enjoy pulling.” Submitted by custardcreems.

“Rank isn’t the only thing I enjoy pulling.” Submitted by custardcreems.

“Lestrade’s out of town today, but I’m willing to be your detective inspector.” Submitted (with photo) by epicnessisfoundwithin.

“Lestrade’s out of town today, but I’m willing to be your detective inspector.” Submitted (with photo) by epicnessisfoundwithin.

“Would you like to be wearing this jumper tomorrow morning?” Submitted by herbailiwick.

“Would you like to be wearing this jumper tomorrow morning?” Submitted by herbailiwick.

“You had me at ‘Afghanistan or Iraq?’” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“You had me at ‘Afghanistan or Iraq?’” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“I’d wait for you even if you faked your death and didn’t return for three years.”

“I’d wait for you even if you faked your death and didn’t return for three years.”

“I hope Mycroft never gets off your sheet.” Inspired by this (submitted by sherlockian4life13).

“I hope Mycroft never gets off your sheet.” Inspired by this (submitted by sherlockian4life13).

“Even if I knew nothing about you, I would flat share with you.” Submitted by anonymous.

“Even if I knew nothing about you, I would flat share with you.” Submitted by anonymous.

“How about you treat me the way Irene Adler treats royalty?” Submitted by absolutelyhetero.

“How about you treat me the way Irene Adler treats royalty?” Submitted by absolutelyhetero.

“I knew it was dangerous getting you into crap telly. I should get you into my bed instead.”

“I knew it was dangerous getting you into crap telly. I should get you into my bed instead.”

“Boys, please, not here. Let’s take it to my bedroom.” Submitted (with photo) by somenerdygirl.

“Boys, please, not here. Let’s take it to my bedroom.” Submitted (with photo) by somenerdygirl.

“You let my flatmate into your crime scenes… How about letting me into something else of yours?”

“You let my flatmate into your crime scenes… How about letting me into something else of yours?”

“I would sprain a junkie’s arm for you.”

“I would sprain a junkie’s arm for you.”

Threesomes solve everything.

Threesomes solve everything.

“My mustache isn’t the only thing I’d shave for you.” Submitted by Courtney (no username).

“My mustache isn’t the only thing I’d shave for you.” Submitted by Courtney (no username).

“I always hear ‘suck my face’ when you’re speaking, but it’s usually subtext.” Submitted by Courtney (no username).

“I always hear ‘suck my face’ when you’re speaking, but it’s usually subtext.” Submitted by Courtney (no username).

“I would name my daughter after you even if Sherlock wasn’t a girl’s name.”

“I would name my daughter after you even if Sherlock wasn’t a girl’s name.”

“I don’t know about Sherlock, but I know exactly where to look.” Submitted by amylemoymoy.

“I don’t know about Sherlock, but I know exactly where to look.” Submitted by amylemoymoy.

“I love a shaved pussy… and I’m not talking about Sekhmet.”Suggested by someone I know in real life, who doesn’t have a Tumblr and is too embarrassed to take credit for the idea anyway.

“I love a shaved pussy… and I’m not talking about Sekhmet.”Suggested by someone I know in real life, who doesn’t have a Tumblr and is too embarrassed to take credit for the idea anyway.

“If I can convince a sniper to reconsider shooting John, I’m sure I can convince you to reconsider not dating me.”

“If I can convince a sniper to reconsider shooting John, I’m sure I can convince you to reconsider not dating me.”

“One more miracle, for me, please… Don’t have a boyfriend or girlfriend.”Submitted by amylemoymoy.

“One more miracle, for me, please… Don’t have a boyfriend or girlfriend.”Submitted by amylemoymoy.

“Is your last name Morstan? Because I wanna Mary you.”

“Is your last name Morstan? Because I wanna Mary you.”

“If I tried to deny my love for you, it’d be less convincing than Hooper in a mustache.”

“If I tried to deny my love for you, it’d be less convincing than Hooper in a mustache.”

“I need you more than Lestrade needs a drink when he’s afraid.”

“I need you more than Lestrade needs a drink when he’s afraid.”

“I could break every bone in your body while naming them, but right now there’s only one bone of yours I’m interested in.”

“I could break every bone in your body while naming them, but right now there’s only one bone of yours I’m interested in.”

“I may not be a corpse, but I would let you whip me even if there wasn’t a medical point to it.”

“I may not be a corpse, but I would let you whip me even if there wasn’t a medical point to it.”

“Do you have a secret twin? Because if so, I’d love to get acquainted with both of you.”

“Do you have a secret twin? Because if so, I’d love to get acquainted with both of you.”

“Are you the other me in the other place? Because I think you’re pretty damn smart.”

“Are you the other me in the other place? Because I think you’re pretty damn smart.”

“You not loving me would mean more misfortune and disaster than the Second Afghan War.”

“You not loving me would mean more misfortune and disaster than the Second Afghan War.”

“Holmes says that the fair sex is my department. Shall I prove it?”

“Holmes says that the fair sex is my department. Shall I prove it?”

“I bet you’re more popular than The Blue Carbuncle.”

“I bet you’re more popular than The Blue Carbuncle.”

“I want you more than The Strand readers want proper murders.”

“I want you more than The Strand readers want proper murders.”

“I would kick Moriarty over a waterfall for you.”

“I would kick Moriarty over a waterfall for you.”

“If Moriarty suggested that you and I elope, I would not find it impertinent or offensive.”

“If Moriarty suggested that you and I elope, I would not find it impertinent or offensive.”

“I am glad you liked my potato, but I bet that’s not the only thing about me you would like.”

“I am glad you liked my potato, but I bet that’s not the only thing about me you would like.”

“I’m a storyteller. I know when I’m in one. And meeting you was clearly my happily ever after.”

“I’m a storyteller. I know when I’m in one. And meeting you was clearly my happily ever after.”

“If you thought The Abominable Bride pushed you to mental and physical extremes, you should see what I can do in the bedroom.”

“If you thought The Abominable Bride pushed you to mental and physical extremes, you should see what I can do in the bedroom.”

“I know what a nurse is capable of, but I still say that you’re excessively skilled for one.”

“I know what a nurse is capable of, but I still say that you’re excessively skilled for one.”

“If you were Sherlock’s veins, I would be cocaine just so I could get inside of you.”

“If you were Sherlock’s veins, I would be cocaine just so I could get inside of you.”

“Did Holmes learn about jets from you? Because you’re pretty fly.”

“Did Holmes learn about jets from you? Because you’re pretty fly.”

“If someone accused me of loving you, I’d be guiltier than a brother with a green ladder.”

“If someone accused me of loving you, I’d be guiltier than a brother with a green ladder.”

“Are you Sherlock Holmes? Because I wanna see you shake your mind pal-ass.”

“Are you Sherlock Holmes? Because I wanna see you shake your mind pal-ass.”

“Are you from a future world? Because I want to get your telephone contraption number.”

“Are you from a future world? Because I want to get your telephone contraption number.”

“I want to say ‘I love you’ to you more often than Holmes says ‘features of interest.’“

“I want to say ‘I love you’ to you more often than Holmes says ‘features of interest.’“

“I don’t care whether your birthday video is cut or uncut, but I am curious about something else of yours.”

“I don’t care whether your birthday video is cut or uncut, but I am curious about something else of yours.”

“Are you Mrs. Hudson’s car? Because I wanna take you for a ride.”

“Are you Mrs. Hudson’s car? Because I wanna take you for a ride.”

“Are you the well that Victor Trevor died in? Because I’m about to go deep inside you and feel how wet you are.”

“Are you the well that Victor Trevor died in? Because I’m about to go deep inside you and feel how wet you are.”

“Are you John’s therapist’s flower vase? Because when I look at you, I see a tall glass of water.”

“Are you John’s therapist’s flower vase? Because when I look at you, I see a tall glass of water.”

“Are you the R in A.G.R.A.? Because you’re the rose of my world.”

“Are you the R in A.G.R.A.? Because you’re the rose of my world.”

“Forget Victor Trevor. Next time you chain me up, a very different kind of bone is going to emerge.”

“Forget Victor Trevor. Next time you chain me up, a very different kind of bone is going to emerge.”

“I can’t keep my knackered, weary, old eyes off of you.”

“I can’t keep my knackered, weary, old eyes off of you.”

“Are you Victor Trevor? Because whenever I’m with you, all around me is well.”

“Are you Victor Trevor? Because whenever I’m with you, all around me is well.”

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