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“I would marry you even if your proposal got interrupted by your best friend who faked his death.â€
“Sherlock can survive without food easier than I can survive without you.â€
“Your wit is sharper than Irene Adler’s heels.â€
“Mycroft says that you have the brain of a scientist or a philosopher, but I think you have the brain of my future husband.â€
“Broadly speaking, I’d like to have a ‘function’ in your ‘narrative.’“
“If you can always tell a good Chinese by examining the bottom third of the door handle, then what can we tell by examining your knob?â€Submitted by nzeuropean.
“It’s fine. It’s all fine when you’re around.â€Submitted by nzeuropean.
“I don’t have friends, just potential love interests.â€Submitted by nzeuropean.
“Unlike my work for the British government, I occupy a major position in the bedroom.â€Submitted by nzeuropean.
“Your style is more iconic than Sherlock in a deerstalker.â€
“My coat collar isn’t the only thing that’s up.â€
“I must be 221b’s wallpaper, because you’re making me smile.â€
“Crap telly and chill?â€
“We can’t eat in the kitchen because Sherlock keeps experiments in it. Shall I take you out to dinner instead?â€
“Wanna try some roleplaying? You’re Sherlock Holmes. Wear the damn hat.â€
“I would go back in time during our fourth season just to be able to say that I’ve loved you for centuries.â€
“Sherlock must not know anything about you, because you are a star.â€
“Finding someone as beautiful as you is more difficult than getting Sherlock to follow the rules of Cluedo.â€
“I love you more than Jennifer Wilson loved the color pink.â€
“I’m the perfect boyfriend: I’m very loyal, very quickly, and I’m not interested in anything your brother offers me.â€
“I would make you my bride even if you were abominable.â€
“You say alone protects you, but I know of another kind of protection that we can use together.â€(Edit: This graphic was originally uploaded with Sherlock’s font instead of John’s, even though John’s supposed to be the one saying the pick-up
Happy Halloween, followers! Sorry again I had to upload this so late. (And yes, that’s a Goomba on Sherlock’s face. I was gonna do a Luigi hat, but that would have been too predictable.)
“My love for you is deeper than Sherlock’s voice.â€
“When you’re away, I miss you more than John misses the battlefield.â€
“I bet I can make you wetter than the fandom’s post-Reichenbach tears.â€
“Sherlock knows more about the solar system than you do about me… Want to fix that?â€
“I trust you more than Sherlock trusted his brother, Molly Hooper, and twenty-five at most tramps.â€
“Will you be the Sherlock to my Buckingham Palace? I want you inside of me with no clothes on.â€
“Don’t leave me hanging. I’m not the mannequin in 221b.â€
“Are you Mrs. Hudson’s cooking? Because I want you inside of me.â€
“I would say sweet things to you even if I knew that bombs have off switches.â€
“I like blondes… even speckled blondes.â€
“If you were naked in front of me, I would never tell you to put on a napkin.â€
“When I said you were very ugly, I meant it in John Watson Sign Language.â€
“You make me feel higher than Sherlock overdosing on a jet.â€
“My love for you is even more enormous than 1880s Mycroft.â€
“If I tried to deny my love for you, it’d be less convincing than Hooper in a mustache.â€
“I need you more than Lestrade needs a drink when he’s afraid.â€
“I could break every bone in your body while naming them, but right now there’s only one bone of yours I’m interested in.â€
“I may not be a corpse, but I would let you whip me even if there wasn’t a medical point to it.â€
“May I be your unsavory companion of dubious morals?â€
“Do you have a secret twin? Because if so, I’d love to get acquainted with both of you.â€
“Are you the other me in the other place? Because I think you’re pretty damn smart.â€
“You not loving me would mean more misfortune and disaster than the Second Afghan War.â€
“Holmes says that the fair sex is my department. Shall I prove it?â€
“I bet you’re more popular than The Blue Carbuncle.â€
“Ignore the illustrator. You’re so unforgettable, I would recognize you with or without a mustache.â€
“I would give you dancing lessons even if it meant your Sign Language needed work.â€
“I want you more than The Strand readers want proper murders.â€
“My feelings for you are so blindingly obvious, even Lestrade could work them out.â€
“I am glad you liked my potato, but I bet that’s not the only thing about me you would like.â€
“I’m a storyteller. I know when I’m in one. And meeting you was clearly my happily ever after.â€
“If you thought The Abominable Bride pushed you to mental and physical extremes, you should see what I can do in the bedroom.â€
“Are you Mrs. Hudson? Because I need to give you more lines… More pick-up lines, that is.â€(This one got a bit meta, haha.)
“I know what a nurse is capable of, but I still say that you’re excessively skilled for one.â€
“If you were Sherlock’s veins, I would be cocaine just so I could get inside of you.â€
“Did Holmes learn about jets from you? Because you’re pretty fly.â€
“If someone accused me of loving you, I’d be guiltier than a brother with a green ladder.â€
“Are you Sherlock Holmes? Because I wanna see you shake your mind pal-ass.â€