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Dad doesn’t get too detailed when he wants to send an erotic love note to his wifey, and his son should be thanking his stars. But since you mentioned it, yes a sex swing will be involved just like every other anniversary.
When my wife was alive, we moved into her mom’s upstairs bedroom. Long ago, when I mentioned all my girlfriends were brunettes (like her), she bought me a blonde blow-up doll and joked that I could finally do a blonde. After her dad’s
Neff’s dad has been working with a model, Carole, taking reference photos for sculptures of his. When in Seattle this week, I mentioned I’d like to do a model shoot and he arranged the whole thing.Talking on the phone briefly, she and I easily
Thanks to everyone that took me up on my Discount Flash Sale. The response was very humbling. I mentioned earlier it was intended to get my dad out of some financial straits. So I took a tiny bit of footage of him receiving it by the tree. (Voices were
frizas:giorno finally understanding the true extent of his powers
babybluelantern: “Dad I told you about Amanda right? The friend that I was playing with between classes, I must have mentioned it at some point maybe while you were eating me out. Anyway I got a little carried away now she wants to play with you too.
foodforsub: When Dad first started training me to clean his cock after using it in my ass, I didn’t like it all. It didn’t taste any good not to mention the humiliation of being forced to do such a thing. I begged Dad to not make me to do it, but
When he’s had a bad day, he’ll tell me to ask him how his day was. When I (invariably) do, he interrupts me, shouting “DON’T ASK!!”When I mention that someone’s deaf or heard of hearing, he says “Pardon?”When someone drops a few small
His been excited about his circumcision ever since his dad mentioned it.
When my dad found my stash, more than 30 years ago now, he said, “I found your grass. We should talk about it.” He never mentioned it again. Now he’s dead. He never stopped, but I was smoked out soon after.
My friend just casually mentioned how attractive she finds my dad…please don’t.
i-need-the-pie-bitch: i-need-the-pie-bitch: my brother once accidentally locked himself in a dog cage and starting snapchatting photos for help till my mum and dad had to drive over and free him did I fail to mention my brother is a 25 year old man
imflare: serenamidori: bug-dad: drakdrawings: WOW WHAT A PIECE OF SHIT “look kid” HAHAHA no, shut up, don’t steal art. They didn’t even mention stealing at all lol even tho I guess it is they’re pointing fingers at themselves
nitrosplicer: goddessofgamma: Any time I mention anything to do with superheroes to my dad, he sagely says “Ahh. We will deep fry your kebab.” because the only scene of any superhero film he’s ever seen is that bit of Infinity War that’s
gubrul: so i was talking to my dad about guardians of the galaxy and when i mentioned chris pratt my dad sighs and says “I dont know how parents could be mean enough to name their child after a fried rodent” and i sat there looking really confused
blacklongfellow: After beating my Dad in basketball for the first time, he started complaining about having sore muscles. “Son, I can’t ball like I use to, without getting a massage afterwards”, Dad mentioned one day in passing. Next I knew,
reefs231: You knew your uncle was nasty, but you didn’t expect that he would call you into his bedroom while he was jacking off. He told me not to mention it to my dad
thesickshop: what is my gender? my gender is [large truck passes by] but everybody calls me “dad”
cop-puncher-666: cyphella: s/o to the kids who got uglier when puberty hit I feel yall 100% s/o to me I’m ripped as hell and my dick is huge and i fuck sex women all day in my nice car and my dad can’t make me eat dirt fuck you dad fuck you dad
ianjq: Old Chameleon Jr. stuff!As mentioned by Toby Jones in this post, “My Dad Can Beat Up Your Dad” is one of the oldest OK KO! stories, dating all the way back to 2012! I wrote it right after I finished the pilot and it survived, mostly unscathed,
audreyii-fic: gubrul: so i was talking to my dad about guardians of the galaxy and when i mentioned chris pratt my dad sighs and says “I dont know how parents could be mean enough to name their child after a fried rodent” and i sat there looking
shantelmacphail1: dothistomygf: My GF and I mentioned to my buddy our fantasy, then this happend I don’t know why my boyfriend wanted to watch my dad fuck me, but either my dad or boyfriend are buying me a new dress-tammy
stolenwhales: dance-hall-dyke: satan-is-salmon: psychara: onlylolgifs: X THIS IS THE BEST COMMERCIAL EVER I’ve reblogged this so many times because I truly think every parent should involve themselves with what their child enjoys. Not to mention
darkeecofreak: So my dad pointed out a fairly important feature of Boros: his single eye. And dad was like, since Boros only has one eye, his depth perception must be shit. Of course I mentioned the one on his chest but that’s covered up most of the
healingx: The thing about invisible illness is that you feel so guilty for mentioning it bc everyone views it as complaining. There’s a difference between asserting your needs and complaining but a lot of people don’t see it that way. This has caused
kaible: This is one of my favorite posts because that cat’s fucking name is fucking meatloaf Let us just appreciate that this person’s dad didn’t know when they would be home and so he couldn’t plan for them to be able to join the family for
daytimeblogger: elysedc: The ultimate dad joke compilation what a country
charlesoberonn: Vidalia Appreciation Post Sour Cream might have one shitty dad but he’s got the coolest mom.
emengel: I can’t get enough the fan made family dynamics of Overwatch. Dad 76 and Mercy Mom. Bonus: grandpa reinhardt and nANA. (work has been busy and this is the best i could put out after weeks of nothing? forgive me, friends.)
readmor: my dad just said “the breakfast at this hotel is open until 10” in his sleep i can’t breathe
Oh yay it’s Monday, the day that it’s nearly guaranteed I’ll be verbally abused by my sister and my dad refuses to do anything about it What. Fun.
galaexe: MY DAD JUST SENT THIS TO ME
distractful: Her dad passed out candy to everyone on the flight so his 3 year old could trick or treat
saaav: yournewfriendshouse: katastrophic-kitten: im-an-octopus: im-an-octopus: im-an-octopus: im-an-octopus: im-an-octopus: im-an-octopus: im-an-octopus: im-an-octopus: So i’m moving out on my own soon and my dad wants to make sure i know
vendettafrank: existentialrobotangst: vendettafrank: even my homophobic dad made a good point about homophobic people. he said that when you mention a gay couple to homophobes they always get disgusted and the first image that pops in their head is
princess-jpeg: jennnalouisecoleman: allmymetaphors: when van gogh was out painting in a field some kids shot him by mistake while they were playing with their dad’s shotgun but he told everyone he shot himself so they wouldn’t get in trouble and
nekobill: bob-belcher: I NEED HIM AS MY DAD A A A A A A A A A A A
Oh my god no my dad called oh god no he asked me if I even love at the house anymore and said he hasn’t seen me in a week and he couldn’t wait to see me again fuck this is messing with me so bad oh no someone help
juliawiinchester:I’ve decided I’m only going to answer my dads texts with pictures of Ben Wyatt
coloradoqueen: kingofrunes: yourshipsaregross: disgustinganimals: pizzacatsandboobs: kaible: This is one of my favorite posts because that cat’s fucking name is fucking meatloaf Let us just appreciate that this person’s dad didn’t know when
glumshoe: When my dad was a teenager, he accidentally started working for a restaurant that was a front for the local mafia. He flipped burgers for a semester and then, when he wanted to leave, one of the members pulled a gun on him and said he couldn’t.
the44thpilot: coelasquid: therorasaurus: so my dad’s friend was bartending and saw a guy put something in a girl’s drink so while the guy turned around he switched their drinks and watched the guy roofie himself. Chaotic good
friestrology: ahzodiac: ntbx: Dead at the “lol you wild. Wyd though” Mom: Virgo, Capricorn, Libra, Cancer Dad: Pisces, Taurus, Scorpio, Aquarius Tyler: Sagittarius, Gemini, Aries, Leo tyler must be the most chill person on earth he’s so precious
bezoarcureforpoison: strawberryinstantoatmeal: my dad owns a small business and today he found out that one of his male employees was sexually harassing a female coworker and sending her dick pics and shit and so my dad fired him and then immediately
screamingcrawfish: screamingcrawfish: my dad is drunk watching bob ross & nodding every few seconds going “interesting” and “that’s a good way of thinking about it bob” update: my dad just sat up a little straighter and said “all RIGHT,
kidlazer: florida dad ur doing great sweetie k;sdl;ksdlsdk fuck it up!!!
simonalkenmayer: fuck-customers: Funny story from the other night: A dad came into my cafe with his 3 year old daughter. He bought her a cookie and himself a coffee. They sit down, and I go back to my pre-closing cleaning. Three minutes later
staganddragon: Soft things my dad has done One time when he was 18, he was fishing and found a baby salamander someone had tried and failed to use as bait. It had a huge gash in its side and didn’t look like it would make it. He put it in the bucket
marvelobsessions: this is the funniest text I have ever received from my dad
im going to talk about my sister because im mushy but for her wedding she asked people not to mention things like HEY HAHA YOU CANT RIDE A BIKE or anything embarrassing because shes just this super proud person but my dad is a typical dad and still went
There was this one time when I was about 11-12 years old and I was in a bookstore looking at some Pokemon magazines, and dad was talking to this guy and they were talking about his kids. The guy got to a part where he mentioned to my dad about how its
Well that was a stream, got drunk, fucked own brother first chance Igot, had another dude joinin for voicework. I mean it was pretty rgeat haha. now I can finally focus on drawing, did I mention I was drunjk, shouldnt have played this drinking game.
adventuretimeconspiracies: oryxofeliaWhen Marceline started hunting vampires because a human reminded her of Simon, she mentioned how little she had to eat.Fries are not red, she wasn’t a vampire when her dad took them. Her dad stole her fries when
ianjq: Old Chameleon Jr. stuff! As mentioned by Toby Jones in this post, “My Dad Can Beat Up Your Dad” is one of the oldest OK KO! stories, dating all the way back to 2012! I wrote it right after I finished the pilot and it survived, mostly unscathed,
daddyswhore: When Dad told me about working as his secretary he mentioned that it would be long hours and I’d spend most of it bent over a desk working hard. What he failed to mention was how anal he was about everything.
![thesickshop: what is my gender? my gender is [large truck passes by] but everybody calls me “dad”](https://64.media.tumblr.com/avatar_2d912795cf01_128.png){kind=avatar}
