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Aw, thanks :) I suppose it’s fine if anyone ever shows it to Benedict or Martin– if they’re okay with the fanfiction, they should definitely be okay with this blog! (Actually, I think someone did send some of these to Martin on Valentine

“I’ll eat you out even though digestion slows me down.”

“Forget the lipstick-matching present– let’s unwrap you.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.

“I don’t have to die if I’ve got you– and believe me, I will have you.”

“I would buy you a deerstalker even if the rest of Scotland Yard didn’t pitch in.”

“You know what they say about big feet? Well, just call me Carl Powers.”

“I bet I can keep you wetter than Soo Lin Yao’s teapots.”

“I hope Mycroft never gets off your sheet.” Inspired by this (submitted by sherlockian4life13).

“I would never chase some killer while trying to get off with you.”

“Are you my blogger? Because I’d be lost without you.”

The best of The Blind Banker references, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.

“I may not be The Golem, but I bet I can squeeze the life out of you, if you get what I mean.”

The best of Sherlock Holmes’s facial expressions, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.

“I would show off at your trial just to get locked in a cell with you.”

“Face the other way. You’re getting me off.”

“You make me so stiff, Molly mistook me for one of her cadavers.”

“I like my partners the way I like my wall decorations: Music-loving and horny.”

“Wanna see what’s Under my Shaw?” Seriously though, save Undershaw!

“Don’t you want me on the floor too? And on the bed, and on the couch, and on the table, and against the wall…” Submitted by anonymous.

“Dear Jim, I’m in love with you. Won’t you fix it for me?” Submitted by anonymous.

“Since you blew your nose on the lady from the train’s number, would you like mine instead?” Submitted by anonymous.

“I don’t need a good coat and a short friend to look ‘tall,’ if you get what I mean.”

“I would pretend to be drunk just to go for a ride with you.”

“Mrs. Turner has married ones. How about you and I be Mrs. Hudson’s married ones?”

“You can ride me if you want. I even come with a riding crop!”

“Will you 221-be mine?”

“I just met you, and this is crazy, but I know everything about you, so come live with me maybe?” Submitted by anonymous.

“Whenever I’m apart from you, I’m bluer than my scarf.”

“You make me so giddy, I’m giggling even at crime scenes.”

“Well, I do believe that my pupils have dilated!” Submitted by crows-flight.

The best of series one references, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.

“Forget my sociopathy; you should do your research on my high-functioning penis.”

“If you were my drug, a seven percent solution wouldn’t be enough.”

The best of series two references, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.

“If I had a silly-looking jumper for every time I thought of you, I’d be John Watson.”

“I’d love to have a look around your top-secret areas.” Submitted (with photo) by cumberbitchsandwich.

The best of submissions, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.

“Forget dead pigs– want to see what I can penetrate with my other harpoon?”

“I would come to your flat even if I was on the other side of town and it could be dangerous.”

“When I’m retired and studying bees, will you be my honey?”

“You’ve never been the most luminous of people, but you brighten up my world.” Submitted by anonymous.

“If you give me your heart, I promise I won’t put it in the fridge.”

“I’d love to get under your sheets. Especially if you were still wearing them.”

“Our babies would be sexy in both senses of the word.” Submitted by gloveonafoot.

“I’m more desperate for you than Mycroft is for tea on a train.” Inspired by a tweet from Mark Gatiss.

“Excuse me, but I couldn’t help but notice the state of your knees…” Submitted by absolutelyhetero.

“I enjoy my jumper collection, but I’d much rather have you on my body instead.”

“I knew it was dangerous getting you into crap telly. I should get you into my bed instead.”

“I couldn’t keep my eyes off of you, so I had to put them in the microwave.”

“If your flatmate punched you in the face, I would kiss it better.”

“I named our dog Gladstone because you make me happy and hard.”

“Boys, please, not here. Let’s take it to my bedroom.” Submitted (with photo) by somenerdygirl.

“I love you more than John loves jam.” Submitted by xhowisharveywallbangeronewordx.

“Are we doing it? Have we done it?”

“I noticed you’re wearing a deerstalker. May I be your dear?”

“Cerise isn’t the only thing that will drain you. You should see my purple shirt.” Submitted by Emily (no username).

“Will you be the Sher-key to my Sher-lock?”

“Do you like Mexican food? Because I’ll gladly offer you a taste of my fiesta dick.”

“I would disguise myself as a wounded vicar just to get invited into your home.”

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