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“The lack of a ring when you slapped me isn’t the only reason I’m glad your engagement’s over.”

“The door knocker isn’t the only thing I won’t let my brother turn straight.”

“I’d like to corrupt your ‘magnetic strip.’”

“Forget solving crimes– I could use you as an alternative to getting high.”

“Don’t worry, I’m no London ambulance. I take longer than eight minutes to come.”

“Are you Cupid? Because you just shot me in the heart.” Submitted by scripturientjester.

“The shooting last week isn’t the only reason you may have to restart my heart.”

“I’d keep your chair even if it was blocking my view to the kitchen.”

“Undercover about my feelings for you? WELL I’M NOT NOW!”

“Are you the East Wind? Because I’d let you take me in the end… in the rear end, that is.”

Hey, followers! I hope you’re all having a wonderful Easter because I am having the worst Easter of my life and it is a goddamn miracle I was even able to put this comic together.

“I’ve got some pictures for you as a treat… And I’m not talking about the ones I showed Archie.”

“Let’s do a procedure where the participants tend to know each other and it’s over when one of them’s dead… No, I’m not talking about murder.”

“Even if you told me that the Western world is run from a single house, I’d still want to talk about dinner.”

“The game is never over. I want to play with you forever.”

“Those things’ll kill you… I know what you should put in your mouth instead.”

“I would never tell you to get out of my head when I’m busy.” Submitted by anonymous.

“Forget faking my geniusâ€¦ Want to see a different sort of magic trick?” Based on a suggestion by anonymous.

“Becoming a figment of my mind palace isn’t the only way to get inside of me.”

“Us meeting couldn’t be coincidence. The universe is rarely so lazy.”

“I would never put the doorbell in the fridge if you were the one ringing it.”

“Without you, I get so bored that I start shooting walls.”

“My mouth is big enough for fourteen cigarettes. Wanna see what else can fit in it?”

“Wanna see my Sher-cock?”

“I would jump out of a cake for you even if I wasn’t revealing that I faked my death.”

“I love you more than Sherlock loves dancing.”

“I still love you even though your mustache doesn’t rub off.”

“Let’s throw a dummy off a roof, fake our deaths, and make out.”

“The Headless Nun was only headless because she hadn’t met me… I’m excellent at giving head.”

“I would let you call me Sherl.”

“The game is something, but you are everything.”

“My love for you is #NotDead.” (Credit to shockingblankets for the hashtag, which LATER BECAME CANON.)

“I’m not very good at expressing my feelings, so please understand what I mean when I say that my name is actually a girl’s name.”

“You give me life, and not just because Lazarus is go.”

“I would propose to you even if I didn’t need to break into your boss’s office.”

“I would love you even if you messed up my sock index.”

“I would disguise myself as a French waiter to stop you from proposing to someone else.”

“Is there a ball under my armpit, or did you just make my heart stop?”

“When I asked if you came for me, I didn’t just mean to the drug den.”

“Let’s have a relationship that’s in a good place and very affirming.”

“Solving crimes isn’t the only thing I have a vacancy for.”

“I think you’re 221-beautiful.”

“Your smile shines brighter than an inexplicable matchbox.”

The best of The Sign of Three, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.

“You make me more speechless than John asking me to be his best man.”

“theimprobableone will use capital letters before I stop loving you.”

“The game is on… Will you play with me?”

“If you left me, I’d do anything to get you Reichen-back.”

“If you’re Henry Knight, can I be your Henry Steed?”

“You make me more out of breath than Mycroft on a treadmill.”

“You should come home with me instead. Your wife is AGRA-vating.”

“When you called me ‘nurse,’ were you really just making do, or were you trying to roleplay?”

“Are you one of John’s jumpers? Because you look so cozy and unique.”

“I’ve fallen for you more times than that American has fallen out of your window.”

“Will you be the Robin to my Hat-Man?”

“I calculate that there are thirteen possibilities once I invite you into my bedroom.”

“Dieting is for Mycroft. Come on, you know you want a taste of me.”

“Are you a train car in Sumatra? Because you are the bomb.”

“If I had only a minute and twenty-nine seconds left to live, I’d want to spend that time with you.”

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