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sealedbeastnue:“what time is it” you ask, i pull out my 2.7 metric ton granite sundial and immediately crush both of your feet, I loudly announce “it is cloudy”

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original: https://berandomness.tumblr.com/post/178230010378

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lmaonade:wow i sure hope *starts smacking my neck* THERES NO VAMPIRES AROUND. *slaps my neck really really hard* i HOPE there’s NO vampires who might want to BITE ME and suck my blood right here from my *i am smacking so godforsakenly hard* NECK 

lmaonade:wow i sure hope *starts smacking my neck* THERES NO VAMPIRES AROUND. *slaps my neck really really hard* i HOPE there’s NO vampires who might want to BITE ME and suck my blood right here from my *i am smacking so godforsakenly hard* NECK 

lameblr: lameblr: millennials have no brand loyalty because they’re poor not bc they’re disloyal survey: what brand of toilet paper do you buy and why?me: whatever’s on sale my ass ain’t picky

lameblr: lameblr: millennials have no brand loyalty because they’re poor not bc they’re disloyal survey: what brand of toilet paper do you buy and why?me: whatever’s on sale my ass ain’t picky

nuderefsarebest:

nuderefsarebest:

Serpent Bones

Serpent Bones

avvocarlo: if your eyes start hurting what you’ve got to do is lay down and close them for a while…. now that’s a sexy little manoeuvre that we in the medical field like to call “sleep”

avvocarlo: if your eyes start hurting what you’ve got to do is lay down and close them for a while…. now that’s a sexy little manoeuvre that we in the medical field like to call “sleep”

beedablogs:naughty goats get the noodle horns

beedablogs:naughty goats get the noodle horns

intranet: orionis-delta: intranet: codeine-3: intranet: Y'all really see [REDACTED] and hit that reblog button, huh? what does this say i just saw [REDACTED] and hit reblog [REDACTED] [REDACTED]? Okay let me spell it out for you…

intranet: orionis-delta: intranet: codeine-3: intranet: Y'all really see [REDACTED] and hit that reblog button, huh? what does this say i just saw [REDACTED] and hit reblog [REDACTED] [REDACTED]? Okay let me spell it out for you…

i'm a bit of a slut that way

i'm a bit of a slut that way

nessa007: THIS IS SO ADORABLE OMG

nessa007: THIS IS SO ADORABLE OMG

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