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blackwolverine415215: mantush: ruckusdog: You got to Get Up to Get Down Pound that bottom and make him moan, husband… - [x] - Follow Me! 😜 / Check out Fort Troff for some fabulous sex toys! That position right there 🍆💦💦💦💦 Everytime
warpedtoursmoshpit: today in 6th period, it was pouring rain and I arrived late to class due to appreciating the rainfall. so when I finally walked in, I was dripping wet and the teacher gave me a dirty look and said that she was going to mark me tardy
br0lan: my coworker just told me about a kid he knew in second grade that was really allergic to peanuts but one day during lunch he said that he couldn’t take it anymore and wanted to know what reeses taste like so he pulled out his epipen, ate the
laynethomasstaley: Layne called me one day after he’d given me Facelift and said, “So what do you think about the tape?” (I replied) “I think there’s a sleeper on that album.” - a song that was going to creep up on people. “It’s called
skoloton: son-neko: skoloton: if you were expecting me to be disappointed when googling “snakes in hats” then you couldn’t be more wrong Is that a venomous snake? What idiot would do that?! clearly someone willing to make a few sacrifices
seashellhouse: I don’t know if my friends understand that they could literally invite me over to sit on their floor and watch a dumb movie. Like I’m really not hard to please, you don’t even have to feed me. Very low maintenance friend right here…I
supermoclel: jgarv: supermoclel: a brony called me unattractive that’s right he called me ugly because i have hair on my legs You know what I find unattractive? Narcissism, fishing for compliments, refusing to believe that someone finds
jesse-pinkman:What’s the most embarrassing thing to happen to you guys on stage?Andy: These guys have all fallen at various times. That’s embarrassing for them — and me.Patrick: It’s embarrassing for me to be associated with them!Andy: I’m a
triceracroptops: actual thing that happened: starbucks dude: can I have your name? me: claire. starbucks dude: that’s a pretty name. do you have a number to go with it? me, as I visibly text: no, I don’t own a phone.
christianborle:it’s gotten to a point where i actively try to click on rick rolls. i can sense when the rick roll is there and i click on it just to make sure i know that rick is never gonna give me up or let me down
elrondbaggins: tardis-mind-palace:ruthyless: when i was younger i had a really bad fear of danny devito when i was going to sleep so my older brother gave me a watch that he set to like 8 hours ahead so that it was always daytime on the watch when i
elrondbaggins: tardis-mind-palace:ruthyless: when i was younger i had a really bad fear of sasuke uchiha when i was going to sleep so my older brother gave me a watch that he set to like 8 hours ahead so that it was always daytime on the watch when
jonesskillian: My problem isn’t that my favorite characters aren’t real; it’s that I’m not fictional. I don’t want them to be real. What I desperately wish is that I could be fictional with them. It’s not that I want them here with me
I met my new doctor today to take charge of my reproductive health and she was so incredibly nice and kind and listened to me. She also said that despite everything wrong with my body, I have absolutely perfect blood pressure. So I got that going for
I got my tooth pulled today and it was the easiest dental experience I’ve ever had. It’s done, it’s finally behind me, and only cost me out of pocket. I was expecting it to be hundreds for some reason. I’m so relieved that
cavtrooper74: fuckugood: hisdirtyangel62: 😃I’ve got to say…it gets me hot as fuck running across my pic collage on a random blog and seeing all the dirty fuckers that want to fuck me 😈😈😈~~~Thanks ~H 😉💋 Mmmm i would love to Pound
babeimgonnaleaveu: “I’m the one that’s got to die when it’s time for me to die, so let me live my life the way I want to.” - Jimi Hendrix
abigcryingmess: finally got inspiration to work on a hamgelica gatsby au that @kazimir29 inspired me FOREVER ago to do…. still figuring out who everyone would be but so far i equated that daisy is ang, gatsby is alex, eliza is jordan, john church (as
incexxx: ”- I told you not to, and you came inside me… I’m done, this can’t go on like that! I thought it would be fun but… this whole thing is over!- No, mom, don’t get upset, don’t talk like that, I don’t know what got into me! I’ll
oedipuswreckz: I had to stay in the pool, because Mom sunbathing in her bikini had given me an erection that would not go down… Then, with a smile on her face, she got into the water next to me, to “cool off” and accidentally brushed her ass against
unclefather: Snowflakes are a weird concept to me. What makes them that shape? Why do they just fall out of the sky shaped like that? Who is making them that shape? Why did my ex gf Fav my tweet where I announced that I got laid off. Why did you do
woodstockcpl: littlecucky: queenjennyxoxo: Would you marry a girl like me?XoXo Jennyhttps://queenjennyxoxo.wordpress.com/ Yessss!!!! I’m so glad that before we married you got to fuck every guy that you wanted to fuck before you married, and
oedipussywrecks: jigglywhitegirls:whobeme607:oedipuswreckz:I had to stay in the pool, because Mom sunbathing in her bikini had given me an erection that would not go down Then, with a smile on her face, she got into the water next to me, to cool off
castiel-counts-deans-freckles: tajellybeeenz: OH MY GOD I WAS LISTENING TO CARRY ON MY WAYWARD SON AND MY MOM CAME IN AND STARTED SINGING ALONG AND I GOT REALLY UPSET AT HER AND SHE TOLD ME THAT SHE USED TO SING IT TO ME WHEN I WAS A BABY IT’S LIKE
evelynglucas: Unknown artist (let me know if you do!)“If you want to kill yourself, kill what you don’t like. I had an old self that I killed. You can kill yourself too, but that doesn’t mean you got to stop living.” —Archie’s Final
aniseandspearmint: arandomthot: Got to make up for lost time after not being angry enough earlier *me, remembering something that annoyed me 10 years ago* that FUCKHEAD
“I had trouble sleeping the whole time I was doing 12 Years a Slave, but that night, I got even less sleep. But it occurred to me while I was weeping in the night that my discomfort was temporary and Patsy’s wasn’t and it still makes me cry.
tricias-captions: Cucking my husband began before my wedding dress even came off. Anyone who wanted to got to fuck me that night. Except Bob of course. Now that we were married, Bob wasn’t getting anywhere near my pussy with his little dick.
You know that saying… “you don’t know what you got till it’s gone” Yeah that’s been happening to me alot, I try not to take things and people for granted, I didn’t think I did… Apparently I’m wrong.
noahjashinski: “I’m the one that’s got to die when it’s time for me to die, so let me live my life the way I want to.”
I'll never understand the guys that say on hang out #1 "if I ever got a girl pregnant I'd like move or tell her to abort it" like any smart girl will throw you in the friends zone and not spread to that- probably just me though hahahaha
the-ocean-in-one-drop: 1stunnna:“I’m the one that’s got to die when it’s time for me to die, so let me live my life the way I want to.” - Jimi Hendrix
lovetopornyoursex: @empoweredinnocence when you presented yourself to me in that hotel room last week, I was just going to spank you but I could not keep out of you and that cute ass. As soon as I entered you I knew I was going until I got from you
codependentbrothers: Supernatural Meme: One hunter Sam Winchester: Listen to me, you’ve got this dark pit inside you. I know. Believe me, I know. But that doesn’t mean you have to fall into it. You don’t have to be a monster…It doesn’t matter
ilovetoodeeply:i never knew what it felt like when someone got over their pride and reached out to show me that they wanted me back. i was always the one person to think of great gestures and long letters to fight for someone. i can only ever imagine
growley: growley: remember that one time i told mark sheppard i’d get whatever he replied to me with tattooed on my body i got that tattoo tonight i met mark this weekend and the first thing he did was take a picture of me
nuntendo: nuntendo: There’s a guy in a town VERY near mine that’s walking around at midnight dressed as a clown breaking into people’s houses DOES THAT SOUND LIKE A HORROR MOVIE TO YOU BECAUSE IT DOES TO ME SOMEONE GOT A PICTURE OF HIM AND I’M
unclefather: Snowflakes are a weird concept to me. What makes them that shape? Why do they just fall out of the sky shaped like that? Who is making them that shape? Why did my ex gf fave my tweet where I announced that I got laid off. Why did you do
I always see questions on here of “do you spit or swallow” and Jaime and I were talking about this the other day so it got me more curious. Do people really spit cum out? I cannot even imagine doing that to someone. I would feel as if that
I’m reposting this for the jerk that decided to report it and got it taken down! 💁🏻 To all the people that support me on the daily I love you guys!💕 by hopeisabelhoward
his-n4ughtynurs3: southernconfort671: darkadaberry: xgifs-xvids18plus: Caylin At THAT moment when the pussy started to cream….she was on her way to the holy ghost seizure shake!! That got me all excited near the end, wow! 😋💦 The orgasm
LOTD Swim - Jm (i got the wave pic from here) i know that lyrics from this song are so… popular? but this song means a lot to me this week. when i first heard this song, to be honest i didn’t love it THAT much but now i really do it’s
sophalopeart: So I decided to mess around with the idea of making a poster-like thing featuring Jack’s Mannequin lyrics. I decided to use lyrics from “Dark Blue” because that was the song that got me hooked on Jack’s Mannequin. Here it is.
enterracial: He told me to show off my new Jordans! This is the photo that got put up online and led to my boyfriend of two years to break up with me. Love my pony and may Air Jordan’s!
9/11/01Sixteen years ago my dad was driving me to school when we heard the news on the radio , we just kind of drove in silence as it sank in and when I got to school it was announced that school was optional that day but because we were already there
enterracial: He (Tyrone) told me to show off my new Jordans! This is the photo that got put up online and led to my boyfriend of two years (loser Dylan) to break up with me. I swear all little white boys are scared of the power of the big black man.
susiethemoderator: patron-saint-of-smart-asses: taylor-tut: taylor-tut: y’all know that john mulaney quote “the things crazy people say mean nothing to them but everything to me?” every time i hear that quote, i think about how i got this light-up
His dick wasn’t even all that big but he was the only guy I knew that could give me orgasms. Too bad I met him after I got married. Now I have let my husband watch and fuck me after James is done just to get laid properly!
lolsofunny: it’s sad to see it get old and rusty :( that is so fucking creative…i never really realized they did that :( My childhood :( Those movies just got darker and darker. the one thing i love about this post is how no one even had to say what
polareyez: When people ask me what my “tattoo goals” are, I tell them I have a very short list of artists that I’d love work from. Not necessarily a coverage goal, just some dudes that I admire the hell out of. When I moved to Austin, I got to
kingmakings: favorite characters: ron weasley (harry potter) “That’s chess! You’ve got to make some sacrifices! I take one step forward, and she’ll take me. That leaves you to checkmate the king, Harry.”
sexual-feelings: Last night I got my heart broken, so I decided to take some pics to remind myself that I love ME and that’s all I really need. 21 years old
How could you do that… You know I’ve been wanting to so bad and you just go with someone else.. You’ve got to be kidding me. How can you just do stuff with this mystery person at will and have me sitting here waiting while asking to
so darfin got me super worked up and was being really mean and teasing until I was squirming and then he fucked me super hard and I thought we were done but he told me to touch myself and then choked me a lil while telling me I was such a dirty girl and