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fuckmymomhard: onehornywoman: My older son, Jason The Bull, just shoved me to the bed and told me “face down, ass up.” I knew what was expected. Will someone fuck my mom like that?
the-incestuous: incestsecret: I know someday I’m probably going to get caught, she’s probably going to tell someone… but I can’t help myself. Nothing makes me cum as hard as seeing my little girl suck on mommy’s clit. mom son / daddy daughter
sonfermum-redux: The only thing Dad would be upset about is that he wasn’t able to get you first. As for mom, Let’s just say that everything I do to you I had to learn from someone didn’t I?
tales-of-sex-and-incest: Incest Confession: I really did have to work hard to get Daddy to buy me a car. Like, not in a shitty store or anything. No, I made a deal with him. I knew he’d been craving someone much younger than my mom, and he was sniffing
peregr1ne: my mom is trying to pick a colour for her new wheelchair and me and my dad are telling her to get black and she’s just like “but how will I know if someone is stealing it” and my dad is just like “because you’ll be sitting on the
milkofstrawberry: raggedyarchangel: though-hell-should-bar-the-way: Yeah. His dad #SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT ‘CAUSE I SMELL A SICK BURN They said his dad not his mom
nethaca: maverikloki: deejohnes: maverikloki: I hear my mom shrieking downstairs, shouting up to me about “THE CATS! THE CATS!” I run downstairs, thinking someone has died or something and see THIS: I FEEL LIKE I NEED TO PUNCH SOMETHING TO
dutchster: i wish i had a counter which kept track of the number of times i appear in someone’s thoughts. how many of those are people i don’t know? and it should keep track of who’s thinking about me too. is it an old friend, my mom or the cute
daisy-ca:if someone refuses to use your preferred pronouns, give them a new name for example, my mom calls me she so I’ve started calling her Carl
flowaah: the-arena-ballerina: hackamore: thecityhorse: catbug: drunknuncle: HI OKAY my friend Jessica has been missing since 3:06pm Oct. 7. The last her mom heard from her she said she was frightened by someone on her way home. Her phone was last
cerebralgemini: kee-yaw-nah: chilewithcarnage: 3rdeyechakra: Bitch someone said jimmy neutron’s mom look like Faith Evans I can’t fckin breatthhhee delete this now 😂😂😂
unthrifty–loveliness: httplizard: someone: i love my mom ! i can tell her everything, we’re like best friends. she’s always there for me !!me and literally everyone else who was traumatized horribly by their mothers in some way: My least
angels-and-geniuses: OH MY GOSH SO MY MOM LOOKED OVER MY SHOULDER WHILE I WAS ON THE COMPUTER AND SHE SAW JARED PADALECKI AND SHE SAID, “Is that Fabio?” Fabio. Fabio. how has someone not called Sam that yet in Supernatural?
giradiscosestragados: Deep down, I love her, but it’s not the love of a son. It’s strange… if someone hurt her, I’d kill him. And yet, I can think of a hundred people I love more than my mom. It’s a paradox having a mother that you’re incapable
airrogance: aint nobody scared of your scrawny ass alls someone gotta do is grab your wrist like moms do to children in the grocery store
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kelly-mom-wife: Someone’s page today has me looking like this
chirotus: geekgirlsmash: spookyaddiction: motherfuckingurl: powerviolent: A CLOUD FELL? Snow? that is bubble soap. someone has made a tragic mistake Let me tell you a story. My mom had a hot tub, she traded a refrigerator for it. One day the
littleivor: I suffered from really bad chronic nosebleeds when I was a kid and one time i had one so bad it covered my face and chest and shirt. i mean it was everywhere i looked like i’d just eaten someone. so i go to my mom and tap her awake and
equalistmako: kanthia: equalistmako: someone: I love how welcoming and nice and non-toxic this fandom is~ me, sipping hard liquor from a “World’s Best Grandma” coffee mug: lmao give it time me, sipping coffee from a “world’s okayest mom”
brokuto-koutarous-mom: picaso: picaso: i am sitting on the couch, i hear tapping on the door behind me, i turn around and see this what do i do he is here…. i still lose it every time i see this post because someone let a fucking goose into their
sua-sponte-deactivated20200331:oatmealbrain:fullmetalfisting:Still can’t get over that 4chan post that’s like “my mom came into my room and I pretended to be asleep and she stroked my cheek??? Is she gonna kill me???” And someone replied, “she
mochmint:i’m screaming omg someone sAVE STITCHES’ MOM
aethersea:#wait they don’t diecodystheme:Scott pilgrim is so funny because apparently when scott kills someone they just respawn back in their hometown. Imagine waking up on your moms couch and having to explain to your sweet mother that some canadian
librarychair:fandomsandfeminism:kineticpenguin:thyrell:“ooh you hate cops but who are you gonna call when you get robbed?” uhhhhh your moms house? a great tragedy has befallen me and i need to have sex immediatelyEvery time someone’s like “who
You dont know true terror until you send a sexual text meant for someone else to your mom
earthdad: someone ask me what my mom has in common with a squid
snirts: ultarviolet: *me coming out as aplatonic* mom…dad… I have no friends someone make the flag
tinyslutttt: sweetyoctopus: tinyslutttt: Next time someone breaks my heart I’m fucking their dad and making him support me Fuck their mom too. YUH
barbaras-caucasity: sounddesignerjeans: we have a real motherfucker here, a true idiot child, someone please come collect your bastard Walmart trying to contact my mom over the loudspeaker
mice-teeth: I took this picture at my old house at least 8 years ago when we were about to leave to the store and someone had backed up a couple times and made these perfect two hearts and my mom stopped the car before driving over them so I could take
moonlitdremr:exciting:fights I would pay to see: sigmund “everyone is attracted to someone” freud vs John “sexual desire is evil and cereal can and will fix it” KelloggAsked my mom who both has a MA in psychology and currently works for Kellogg’s
calellon:bitterrosebrokenspear:scaryorganmusic:dude they banned milf. what if i want to fuck someone’s mom, tumblr? what should i do then? kill myself?They banned suicide you can’t even do that.
portraitoftheoddity:Thinking about how my mom tried to “seduce” my dad when they were in college together by sneaking oranges into his backpack, because she grew up food insecure and feeding someone/sharing food was a big deal with her upbringing
dwagom:moonlitdremr:exciting:fights I would pay to see: sigmund “everyone is attracted to someone” freud vs John “sexual desire is evil and cereal can and will fix it” KelloggAsked my mom who both has a MA in psychology and currently works for
dilfplanet:mom said it’s my turn to be ached for, to have someone feel a stab of hunger for me, to feel nourishment at the sight of me. give it now
berandomness:campyvillain:every machine girl song*footwork edm sample* *sample from an obscure porno about chainsaws turning into big boobed horny lesbian women* I STRUGGLE WITH SEVERE . IDENTITYY ISSUES *sound of a house collapsing* *sound of demolition
pillowgirls: Someone has a super hot mom. Submit to Pillowgirls… I might make you famous. definitely hot
tough-teddy: narootos: jacmirie: eemtheelk: narootos: breaking news: loving adoptive moms garnet, amethyst and pearl take steven skirt shopping + think he is Extremely Adorable ok but here is my question why is it that whenever someone does a human
skvvalker: littleivor: I suffered from really bad chronic nosebleeds when I was a kid and one time i had one so bad it covered my face and chest and shirt. i mean it was everywhere i looked like i’d just eaten someone. so i go to my mom and tap her
wuin-its-kingdom:Who knew tears could run upwards ? | Someone be sure to wipe water moms tears away.
thatsmybxtch: unclefather: mikalhvi: blackberryshawty: unfollowfriday: unclefather: This is literally just penne pasta and chicken nuggets… Mom… honestly thank god im not white This is tragic why the fuck do you have to assume someone
napoleanbonafarte: markv5: Когда смотришь кино с мамой, и тут на экране кто-то начал раздеваться… “When you’re watching a movie with your mom and someone on-screen starts to undress…”
gianttabby: Someone on Twitter thanked Sakurai for uniting Joker with his mom.
hersw33t3std0wnfall: twerking-mom: modern romance I’m pretty sure if someone told me this I would swoon :D
lovelorn-xo: castielsteenwolf: so my family plays this game where if someone is holding something and you yell “drop the bass” they have to drop what they’re holding so my mom was holding a carton of eggs so i yelled it and she looked me dead
why are you all following me is someone paying you is it my mom
rhimagination: callmeoutis: bigeisamazing: if you calling someone out for being a bigot on the internet but won’t call your parents out for the same thing you fake the last time i called my mom a homophobe she slapped me in the face and i’m still
inkbloods:my mom put a sign on our doorbell that said “doorbell broken, please yell ding dong very loudly” and soMEONE JUST DID IT
cheers-mrhiddleston: [x]
chirotus: geekgirlsmash: spookyaddiction: motherfuckingurl: powerviolent: A CLOUD FELL? Snow? that is bubble soap. someone has made a tragic mistake Let me tell you a story. My mom had a hot tub, she traded a refrigerator for it. One day the water
friendlyneighbourhoodpizzaman: babiigurl2413: friendlyneighbourhoodpizzaman: my mom phoned me today and told me that someone in my hometown had robbed the pharmacy at gunpoint but the pharmacist started having an anxiety attack and the robbers were
catbug: drunknuncle: HI OKAY my friend Jessica has been missing since 3:06pm Oct. 7. The last her mom heard from her she said she was frightened by someone on her way home. Her phone was last traced to Ennis, TX, about an hour from where she lives.