sherlock x john
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“What are you doing? Get back into the cage I made for you!” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“I.O.U. a threesome.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“If convenient, meet me in my bedroom. If inconvenient, come anyway.”
“I’m married to my work, so we’ll have to be discreet.” Requested by one of my real-life friends, who doesn’t have a Tumblr.
“If we were at a restaurant together, I wouldn’t deny that you were my date.”
The best of John Watson, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.
“I wouldn’t put on pants for you.” Submitted by britishrandominsanity.
The best of A Scandal in Belgravia references, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.
“If you think my cheekbones are prominent, just wait until you see the bone in my pants.”
“I never want to say ‘LATERZ!’ to you.”
“I know a man… And I am what he likes.” Submitted by Raj (no username).
“I’d like to get some from you… And I’m not talking about cigarettes.”
“My chemical defect for you could never put me on the losing side.”
“When I said I was hoping you’d go deeper, I wasn’t talking about your analysis.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“I’d hit that 1895 times.”
“It’s a good thing I find breathing boring, because you take my breath away.”
“I regret deleting the solar system, because you are out of this world.”
“I’ll be the knife and you be the Cluedo board: Let me pin you against the wall.”
“When I say ‘Vatican Cameos!’ I want you to go down… on me.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“Do I want to see some more of you? Oh, God yes.”
“I would chase you all over London even if my limp wasn’t psychosomatic.”
“I would take your hand even if we weren’t handcuffed fugitives.”
“We’re so domestic, people are even shipping our mugs.”
“I like the turn-ups on your jeans. Wanna be my boy’s father?”
“You had me at ‘Afghanistan or Iraq?’” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“I would ‘coordinate’ with you and a pair of handcuffs in a dark alley anytime.”
“Why do I need to know about the solar system? It’s wrong anyway; my world revolves around you.” Submitted by turtleplz.
“I like your strong moral principle and nerves of steel, and that’s not just the shock talking.”
“You are more indispensable than my homeless network.”
“You know what they say about big feet? Well, just call me Carl Powers.”
The best of John Watson’s facial expressions, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.
The best of miscellaneous episode references, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.
“Mrs. Turner has married ones. How about you and I be Mrs. Hudson’s married ones?”
“You make me so giddy, I’m giggling even at crime scenes.”
The best of series two references, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.
“I would come to your flat even if I was on the other side of town and it could be dangerous.”
“When I’m retired and studying bees, will you be my honey?”
“Sometimes you don’t talk for days on end? That’s fine. I can give you something else to do with your mouth.”
“I’d love to get under your sheets. Especially if you were still wearing them.”
“I knew it was dangerous getting you into crap telly. I should get you into my bed instead.”
“I named our dog Gladstone because you make me happy and hard.”
“Are we doing it? Have we done it?”
“I noticed you’re wearing a deerstalker. May I be your dear?”
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“You steeple your fingers a lot. I could give you something better to do with them.”
“On my face. Come at once, if convenient. If inconvenient, come anyway.”
“Forget tobacco ash. I’d rather blog two hundred and forty-three reasons why I love you.”
“Without you, my heart feels as empty as my hearse.”
“My love for you exceeds the amount of laptops Sherlock has.”
“I want to be your boyfriend more than Sherlock wanted to be a pirate.”
“I would name my daughter after you even if Sherlock wasn’t a girl’s name.”
“I bet you could warm my heart even if Sherlock was keeping it in the fridge.â€
“I would name my daughter after you even if your first name was William.â€
“You’re hotter than the bonfire I put John in.â€
“You’re the fence to my John… I can’t get over you.â€
“Your style is more iconic than Sherlock in a deerstalker.â€
“When you’re away, I miss you more than John misses the battlefield.â€
“I trust you more than Sherlock trusted his brother, Molly Hooper, and twenty-five at most tramps.â€
“When I said you were very ugly, I meant it in John Watson Sign Language.â€
“Getting over you is more impossible than arresting a jellyfish.”
