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literallyaflame: letting my mom watch queer eye was a mistake. she just walked into my room, pointed at some clothes on my floor and said “hey. what would tan say about this???” and i just shuffled over to pick them up like a sad child cause i would
blobfossy: thegang-bangtheory: living the dream I watched this episode they had like a truck full of potatoes and dumped them down a hill and said that’s how many potatoes you consume in a year and she cried and then ran inside and ate more cheesy
coulsonator: that time my sister dropped Misha Collins So, as my sister Kerry told it to me, she was waiting in line for her photo op and a lot of the girls in front of her we making Misha pick them up for their photo. Naturally, my sister said, well
yougavemelilys: The first thing my grandfather ever said to my grandmother was, as he was holding her hands trying to warm them, “I’d like to hold your hand for the rest of my life.” On Tuesday, by his hospital bed, she held his and told him “you
thewolfmanslayer:lolawashere:Never let them know your next move!Please, you gotta watch Eddie Williams’ audition on Australia’s Got Talent 2019 until the end!The way she stood up and said “What!?” I felt that. We all felt that.
filthyfuckingmouths:my sisters 1st grade classroom is predominately muslim students and none of them showed up today and when she called their parents to see if they were okay they said they were too afraid to send their kids to school.so dont sit here
sule-skerry:thefurriestofchows:teathattast:oh,oh this is absolutely beautiful I saw some James Webb Telescope scientists give a talk and one of them said this was her favorite image because she had waited and worked 25 years to see this.
sacrificesatan: dionnesyl: So I came home from school to see my 7 year old sister putting skittles with my antidepressants, I went up to her and asked “Hey what you doing?” She looked at me, smiled and said “Skittles make me happy so I put them
snapchatting: hello, 911? ok get this, Brad told me that Yazmin told him that Zoe told her that Zoe’s cousin Trisha said i look fat in my new jeans, when before she told me i looked hot in them. isn’t that fucked up? like say it to my face next time,
bayonettamom: Fan-made alternate costumes, I’d kill (angels) for that wedding dress!(Source: pixiv)
fatgirlsdoingthings: futuredoctorweirdo: On my last rotation we were prepping a patient for surgery who had a lot of stretch marks (which is very common, of course). The doctor said, “look closely at them, they’re beautiful.” She was right…inside
roughirlust: This sexy little seniorita said that she could handle them both, so the boys went full throttle on her tiny box!
bigchiefatl: xyinx: rhynest0ne: localstarboy: His unc was having phone sex in the car🤦🏾♂️😂 old lady said she a snake tamer 🤣💀🤣 Them oh boys got me dead Lmaooooo NOOOO 💀
theperksofshuttingthefuckup: i remember once i was walking to class near this group of guys and one of them saw his girlfriend and one of his friends was like “c’mon man bros before hoes” and the guy looked him dead in the eye and said “she’s
shay-gnar: thcolleen: Hey baby I showed her these photos after I took them and she just lowered the phone and looked at me and said “I look so high” and it was so funny but I’m so lucky to take pictures of Colleen
yep999: bigdaddysgirl71: Such a sleepyhead this morning but this little fuckdoll still woke up ready to play. Hot as fuck, @bigdaddysgirl71. Here’s what she just said to me about this post: I wanted to show them what you see every night.
hogtiedwhore: tiedupsexy2: The other cheerleaders from the competition said to them if their football wins the game, then they would kidnapper their cheerleaders as a trophy.. She didn’t know that they were serious about that… Wtf I thought
musiqchild007: 20daysofjune: not-ur-habibti: unclecharlesyall: anomaly1: foreverblckshade: Both of them, perfect. Baes thighs tho! I said the same damn thang… Bruh. Shit she ready to be wifed up.
UNLESS bangs are done perfectly, I usually hate them as much as I hate high heels and blue jeans. That being said: This girls bangs and eyes are RUINING MY LIFE. She’s so gorgeous. I want her to put her face creepily close to mine when I’m
reneelynn4u: alifedefiled:@daisyprincess21 said she wished more moms rocked bikinis. This is me, hopefully rocking in and out of one of my bikinis. How you like them? Please feel free to comment, “like” and especially reblog. Thanks for your
So I came home from school to see my 7 year old sister putting skittles with my antidepressants, I went up to her and asked “Hey what you doing?” She looked at me, smiled and said “Skittles make me happy so I put them with your medicine that makes
mizery-loves-company: out-dividual: my grams used to write notes on leaves for me, and leave them in her garden to find. they always said something along the lines of ‘you are loved’ and ‘you are beautiful and always will be’. she used to say
out-dividual: my grams used to write notes on leaves for me, and leave them in her garden to find. they always said something along the lines of ‘you are loved’ and ‘you are beautiful and always will be’. she used to say that the fairies left
fuck-slayer: in english today a girl asked me how i put on makeup with my glasses on and i said ‘i take them off’ and she looked at me like
filthyfuckingmouths: my sisters 1st grade classroom is predominately muslim students and none of them showed up today and when she called their parents to see if they were okay they said they were too afraid to send their kids to school.so dont sit here
did-you-kno: Miley took the rejection to heart, claiming, “I was so upset.” She used a syndicated radio show as a platform to call her one-time heroes “Stinkin’ Radiohead!” and said, “I’m gonna ruin them, I’m gonna tell everyone.”
youngbela: darkerskies: Her husband was in the military and he always said it was bad luck to get a loved one’s name tattooed on them, so in his memory, she got part of his ‘if I don’t come home’ letter tattooed on her. It says, “Just remember,
suzieme: their new neighbor said she’s a “relationship coach” and offered them free coaching sessions for being so friendly - well, being newly married, the young couple is eager to learn all they can!
Mr. Crude stood behind Ms. Johnson and said, “Now, kick them to the side and then bend over and grab your ankles.”“Oooh! Spanking, or fucking?” she asked.“Fucking,” he replied.“Oooh! Pussy, or ass?”“I think so,” he answered with a
Sabrina ran her fingers through her hair as she looked at Mr. Crude.“That’s, ummm… your bra looks… very supportive… and pretty,” said Mr. Crude.“You just like it ‘cause it pushes up my boobs and makes them look bigger.
sexyhotyogapants: As Violet played with her hair she looked at Mr. Crude and said, “Why yes, they are a bit small, but I like the way they feel… pressing on my boobs and my clit. And I’ll bet you like looking at them, don’t you?” “I
Standing in the bathroom with her jeans opened, Penny called out to Mr. Crude saying, “Could you come in here and help me with something?”When he entered the bathroom she looked at him and said, “These jeans are so tight I can’t get them down.
As Kari stuffed her dirty laundry into the washing machine she looked back at Mr. Crude and said, “You’re a life saver! I was down to my very last panties, ones I only wear when I don’t have any clean ones.”“I assume you’re washing them now,”
adultstars-sfw:Marilyn Sugar After Mr. Crude arrived at her house to let her perform her special project, Marilyn said she’d been told that rubbing cum on her tits would make them bigger.“So, after I’ve earned my ‘A,’ would you be willing to
“Are you about ready to go, Anna?” asked Mr. Crude.“Yep! I’m ready now,” she replied.“You’re not wearing those pants. Take them off and put on your bright pink leggings. No panties underneath, either,” he said sternly.“Awww… you
niecewaidhofer14:#NieceWaidhofer “Hey! The boobs are up here!”“Then why did you show me your panties, Niece?” asked Mr. Crude.“Just because I could. Do you like ‘em?” she asked.“I need a closer look. Hand them to me!” he said with
daily-nici: Nici DeeImage by MetArt Nici raised her dress as she looked at Mr. Crude and said, “I seem to have lost my panties somewhere in your house! Would you help me look for them?”
Alisa subtly pushed up her breasts as she pulled down her sweater, smiled and said, “They’re really quite squeezable. You should give them a try, Mr. Crude.”“They look suckable, too,” he remarked. Alisa grinned and replied,
dionnesyl: So I came home from school to see my 7 year old sister putting skittles with my antidepressants, I went up to her and asked “Hey what you doing?” She looked at me, smiled and said “Skittles make me happy so I put them with your medicine
tester1001me: They were on vacation and I met them at the pool. He said “um….hey…um…this may sound weird but ….um…you see my wife over there?….yeah, um….she wants to get to know you better…you know what I mean?, like, really get to
cheatingwivescuck: Your girl was really friendly with the guys down at the track, she always said they helped her massively with her running and breathing, maybe you would go down one day and watch them work with her
wecouldbelong: Alex Molloy and Mike, two little monsters from New York met Monica, one of the assistants of Lady Gaga and according to them, she would have said that new songs will not be released until August.
titsrgreat: metphysicalperversions: She believed him when he said he wouldn’t share! Silly slut. Send in your pics. Send them to my inbox OR: Kik selfshot18plus Snapchat
bringmetheoliver said: wtf. there’s root beer scented pencils?! where can i purchase theseee? iono!! this girl had them at this place i went and i was just like SNIFF SNIFF bc she let me and asdfkljsdkfjsdlk i think i am crazy now like is that even
mypornstash: When I see group photos like this I can’t help wondering what exactly the photographer said to talk them into such an immodest display. Did he/she claim to be Robert Pattison’s publicist or a scout from the Suicide Girls website or an
peekabooxd: dionnesyl: So I came home from school to see my 7 year old sister putting skittles with my antidepressants, I went up to her and asked “Hey what you doing?” She looked at me, smiled and said “Skittles make me happy so I put them with
