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Been thinking about trying to talk to my father again. Idk though. It would be nice to have any relationship with any of my parents at this point but they’re all toxic to some degree and I would hate to go no contact again and feel even more alone
It felt nice to get out and hike a little today. I also went to the gym before I put the baby down. I’m starting to feel a little more human now that I’m not alone in raising the baby but I’m still pretty tiredšš£
I really hate having friends who always have better friends to hang out with. I hate being invited as “I keep forgetting to tell you I’ll be in town” or “if you want, you can come” instead of being made to feel included.
I made a nice chicken curry today. Never had it before but it was good. I also started writing again and I doubt it’ll go anywhere but I’m really trying. I’ve also started going to the gym again now too, I like it even though I feel
Gym has me feeling a little better everyday.
Sometimes I daydream about going back to Alaska just so I could feel cold again.
Went to the gym again after having a bad day and it helped. I don’t feel like crying anymore today. I am so determined to make this a good habit and a better coping mechanism than self harm.
Going to the immersive van Gogh exhibit in Denver in the morning and I’m excited. We’ve had these tickets for months and luckily we’re feeling better too.
It feels very validating to hear the doctor definitively say “you have PCOS” to me after not only struggling with it for so long but struggling in the dark without an official diagnosis. What’s frustrating is that the solution seems
My sister went to basic training today. I’ve cried a lot today. I already miss her. I wish she didn’t feel the need to join just to survive but she can’t make a living elsewhere. I’m just really sad without her
Just feeling so down. I miss my sister so much. I’ve been having headaches everyday for a week. Can’t sleep or eat. I don’t mean to be whiny, I just mis my sister šš„
I really should go up in the mountains more for all the good it did me. I feel relaxed and happy after spending the day at a nice lake.
I had a really great day. I cleaned upstairs for a few hours, my friend watched my kid and got her to bed so I could go see Black Adam, and I just feel really good today. It was so nice just to get out without my kid for once.
Tomorrow is already going to be a long day because it’s almost 3 am and I just got my toddler down again. I miss when she wasn’t sick and would sleep through the night til 9 am. I hope the gas drops I gave her help her feel better. I’m
I lied, I am sad. I just donāt want you to keep questioning me. To the point where Iāll feel worthless, incomplete, aloneā¦
can I just get fucked please? like just fuck me senseless. I donāt want to think or feel anything but a cock in my pussy & strong hands around my neck. just fucking use me for a night. give me hickeys, bruises, scratches, whatever; just make it
So, my birthday is tomorrow. I relapsed yesterday with self-harm. I’ve been feeling suicidal on the daily. I’m 90% sure no one cares. I want to cut ties & burn bridges. I’m exhausted by everyone & myself. I just want to
I’m not sure if the fact that I’m still sad 90% of the time is normal anymore. It feels like effort to be happy. That I can only be happy when I’m extremely busy and distracted. But even that doesn’t last. None of my happiness
I miss feeling complete.
I’ve cried every night for the past three, maybe four nights. I miss him and I miss myself and my happiness and I just feel.. lost. Really lost. I’m numb and I don’t know who I am anymore and I’m so far from loving myself or loving
Formal is in about 4 months. Graduation in 5. Goal? Look fucking fabulous for both.Ā I wanna feel fabulous, both mentally and physically. I’ve already made my schedule out for this semester with my classes and my gym times and frat/pledging things.
First day back at the gym! Super pleased. Left a little later than I wanted so it was a little shorter than I hope for, but still glad to have started up and to be feeling better enough to go :)
If anyone wants to kill my ex for me let me know. I’ve had no luck with guys since day one. Everything feels like a lie. He’s seeing someone right now. Its been a month. I want to fucking kill them they’re pathetic people. I’m
Just had a pleasant conversation with mama about tax refunds, tax forms, the IRS and being audited. So fun actually ahaha I was like I feel so adult and having such a cool (lmao) conversation with my mom since she used to work at a bank and does all out
I smell and feel like a goddess Sooo worth the money I dropped at Lush for my amazing new products. Praise
topderpyanime: This part brought a tear to my eyes I really wanted to cry during that part, it felt so genuine and heartfelt, like you could feel it in the tone of her voice. Iād be so happy to be with someone who love me so genuinely like this when
babyanimalsblog: feeling sad? you need this blog on your dash!
granola-soul: You know, despite all the shit I have to go through, despite how shitty recovery can feel sometimes, Iāll always always always prefer it to being so miserable and evenā¦dead. Iāll always prefer going out and partying with my best friends.
I don’t understand. I seriously don’t. You made me so happy no less than an hour ago and i can already feel this not working out. What is going on. What did i do. Is it me? Why doesnt anyone stay? I understand i get involved with boys too
I canāt believe Iām so distressed that Iām considering posting my paypal address and asking for donations I feel dirty
Do you ever just walk into your house and immediately feel like nobody gives a shit about your presenceand then someone sees you and says hi and it breaks your heart that someone actually DOES care enough to say hi
H a ha hahaha ha oh my god my hair is fucking falling out I canāt deal with this, my hair is one of the only things about me I actually like oh my god no someone please help it constantly feels like my brain is dying inside my skull
h a ha ah oh god no it feels like my brain is dying inside my skull again and that my body is following suit
oh fuck oh shit I need hep oh my god I think Iām dying anxiety pls shit I feel like Iām drowning
I honestly, deeply, truly without a shadow of a doubt hate how emotional I am and I detest my feelings so muchI think I might detest myself too a bit
Iām starting to feel inconsolable
Ohhh boy in that mood again where everything is wrong but nothing is actually wrojg and I regret my whole existence and oh man oh boy can you feel the love tonight
Man I had a feeling today was gonna be a bad mental health day and now gUESS WHAT
Never has getting my way made me feel so fucking guilty and yet so good at the same time. ¾ths of me wants to shoot myself and the other 4th wants to braid my hair
That horrible moment when you go to draw vent art and nothing is working well for you and you just end up with even more feels than before
Aw geez there I go again feeling guilty for existing
Damn I just feel like such a fucking failure all the time
Holy motherfuking hellYou know itās gonna be a bad time when you wake up feeling suicidal and stressed the fuck out
Do you ever just feel like youāre trapped inside your own body? I more or less constantly do
Damn you just know how to make me feel fucking guilty for existing so perfectly that it can take 2 seconds or 2 hours to hit me. Good fucking job.
Nobody makes me feel guilty about maybe having cancer like you. Thank <3
I literally donāt feel well enough to even leave my house today, all my everything is just acting up so badly but I need my meds and I KNOW my dad wonāt be willing to get them for me because he just got back from work after doing a bunch of manual
Nothing makes me feel more empty inside than ārelaxingā for a day
I wish I could at least channel all this bullshit Iām feeling into art but nope of course not, why would it ever work that way– someone please just come fucking put me down
Hey someone should totally help me figure out my gender cause that shit is a huge mystery to me and I literally feel like I canāt figure it out on my own
I feel like Iāve been getting more and more emotionally weak and itās just easier to make me cry and I honestly fucking hate it I hate crying I never ever wanna cry ever
I feel guilty for my entire fucking existence
I honestly canāt tell anymore if Iām now noticing all the fucked up shit going on in the world or if thereās just more shit going on but either way I feel like the world is actually fucking ending.
please stop making me feel guilty for my disabilities okayplease
Oh god suddenly I feel so guilty for just laying in bed writing fanfiction all dayIām so disgusting and unproductive, I hate myself
I feel so fucking guilty and awful, Iām the nfucking scum of the earth Iām so sorry, fuck
I started writing this shit to make me feel better and what do I do? Fucking close i tout 24 pages in cause Iām getting too emotional fucking goddamn it I hate myself I wish I could just fucking die sometimes
Oh my god help the anxiety about going to alateen is so bad I feel literally sick. Food is suddenly going through me, my tummy hurts really bad, Iām hot and cold at the same time and Iām sweating like Iām sitting in an oven
I just sat down to do some vent art and I got legitimately, violently sick and oh god thanks anxiety I already felt like I was dying in the head I didnāt need to feel like Iām dying everywhere else too
Are you ever just so overwhelmed with your own self hatred and sorrow that you just lay there paralyzed wishing you could cry but knowing that if you do youāll feel like a total failure and thatās unacceptable because while you know youāre a failure
