just dont fuck up
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bluberryattack: We don’t talk about Professor Binns enough. He just woke up one day and forgot to take his body with him and then was just like “fuck it, I’ve got a class to teach.” No one has ever been that dedicated to their job.
sherrocked: My dad just yelled “I SWEAR I’LL CUT OFF WHAT’S LEFT OF YOUR DICK IF YOU FUCKING TOUCH MY COKE DON’T YOU DARE” and I came in the room like what the fuck and it was my dad holding up a shoe and my cat sitting by a glass of coca-cola
king-gavino: juniorbizarre: bellatrixisastar: askchangelgrace: catplanetcatplanetcatplanet: steve don’t just accept that bullshit that must have been some fucking witchcraft blue pulled to get that up there That look on his face “Fuck, whatever.
pakchoys:when i tell u to watch fma because it’ll change ur life and u don’t listen, do u think i’m kidding? i’m just clowning? just haha heehooing? he gave up his fucking arm and leg
alice-is-wet: And alllllllll the way up my butt. I fucking LOVE having my ass filled. I don’t know why it surprises me every time just how much…..but holy fuck…. Xoxo Alice
talkintowallsagain: Its 3 am Maybe its the sleep deprivation, maybe its my bio clock, maybe I’m just fucking crazy- but right now I don’t care who knocks me up. Tie me up face down on my knees, in a hotel room, unable to move. Gag me with the
talkintowallsagain: shwbnd: talkintowallsagain: Its 3 am Maybe its the sleep deprivation, maybe its my bio clock, maybe I’m just fucking crazy- but right now I don’t care who knocks me up. Tie me up face down on my knees, in a hotel room, unable
Sehun: I’m not picking up shit! Kyungsoo: Wh..what did you just say to me? Sehun: I SAID I’m not picking up- Kyungsoo: -falcon punch- I don’t know who the fuck you think you talking to but- *reaches for belt buckle* Sehun: Wait.. *starts to back
black–lamb: You know that feeling where you don’t know whether you want to cry, throw up, or fuck somebody up. But you just sit there and breathe slowly instead. all too well. esp after dealing with the fuckery that is Department of Social Service
candiikismet: ewan-mcgregor: Lakeith Stanfield photographed by Joy Wong “Sometimes, as actors, we sit up and we don’t have no fucking answers. And it’s important that we point that out: I’m a stupid human, just like you are. I’m not the fucking
hello dear i was just taking a nap well don,t just stand wanking yourself off your father will be home soon get here and shove that fucking thing right up me there,s a good boy
subfucktoy: It’s so fucking pathetic, isn’t it girls? Is it any wonder why I have him locked up and don’t every let him out. His little clit is just worthless, but it will be so fun watching it jerk and twitch while we fuck his sissy ass with
scootyshabooty: I just sit here sometimes like wow sexism is still a thing the fact that sexism was ever a thing it just it’s beyond me a woman pushes you out of her fucking BODY and you grow up to be like ‘ahahaha women r stupid and weak’ i don’t
How the fuck was I supposed to know you were that hurt? You played it off like u just had a mild confusion and a headache. Now I’ll have to fuck prove myself by the end of the week so you don’t give up on me. What kind of parent says that
secretprincess9312: use-me-abuse-me: please can someone just fuck me up the ass 😂😂#I will eat you for breakfast.Just made my morning. Don’t mind if I do. But I’ll make sure you won’t be able to walk for awhile
sirjsluts: When I lift you up and put your wet pussy on my face don’t just sit there scared to move. Fuck my fucking face. Grind it. I want your pussy all over me. I want your wetness to completely cover my face. I didn’t put you there to sit still.
I just sit here sometimes like wow sexism is still a thing the fact that sexism was ever a thing it just it’s beyond me a woman pushes you out of her fucking BODY and you grow up to be like ‘ahahaha women r stupid and weak’ i don’t get how that
korrasera: geekandmisandry: bentheechidna: beforethelobotomy: september is coming up so here’s your yearly reminder to leave billie joe armstrong the fuck alone Well of course. We don’t wake him up until October 1st. His dad is dead, just
mywhitewife4bbc30477: roughirlust: You don’t have to do a damn thing baby, just lie there, put your legs up and take this black dick like a good girl. Most of the Black guys my wife has fucked feel that way. Just lie there and let me have it is what
the-erotica: Finally a cool place to meet and hook up with a single, horny girls. These girls don’t want a relationship, the dont’t want commitment - otherwise they wouldn’t be here. No strings attached - just sign up, fuck, and go home. Do it
tjones1325: slutpunishment: Come and fucking blow me when I wake up in your mummy’s bed. Just because she left for work early, doesn’t mean I don’t need to cum. So fucking hott 💦👅
moreskin-foreskin: sherrocked: My dad just yelled “I SWEAR I’LL CUT OFF WHAT’S LEFT OF YOUR DICK IF YOU FUCKING TOUCH MY COKE DON’T YOU DARE” and I came in the room like what the fuck and it was my dad holding up a shoe and my cat sitting
kittilumpo: i love the last one though, everyone just stops and half are like ‘fuck i don’t know why isn’t there a maybe option’ and then there’s like four who are just ‘shut up i’m picking no’ and i guess no one asked alaska or hawaii
momandsoninsest: I went to visit my moms law firm one day… *I walk in the door* Me: MOM!!! WHAT THE FUCK??? Mom: Oh, just because I’m a boring old attorney means I don’t have a wild side? Me: Well no, I just… Mom: Shut up, bring that big
your-horny-little-sister: You’re just in time bro!! The grownups just left to go on a hike and I’ve been showing our cousins what all you’ve taught me recently! Hurry up and get in here because we don’t know when we’ll get the chance to fuck
sherrocked: awesomeness2471998: sherrocked: My dad just yelled “I SWEAR I’LL CUT OFF WHAT’S LEFT OF YOUR DICK IF YOU FUCKING TOUCH MY COKE DON’T YOU DARE” and I came in the room like what the fuck and it was my dad holding up a shoe and my
nicholaus-silver: nicholaus-silver: You couldn’t make this up It’s going to be a very short conversation. He wants her to fuck other men. She wants to fuck other men. Now it’s just the details-size, colour , where and when. Actually they don#t
sherrocked: sherrocked: awesomeness2471998: sherrocked: My dad just yelled “I SWEAR I’LL CUT OFF WHAT’S LEFT OF YOUR DICK IF YOU FUCKING TOUCH MY COKE DON’T YOU DARE” and I came in the room like what the fuck and it was my dad holding up
alexbbypls: break-itbrian: if you ever think English is not a shit language just remember that read and lead rhyme and read and lead rhyme, but read and lead don’t rhyme, and neither do read and lead. This post fucked me up. what. the. fuck.
pound2apulp: DON’T JUST FUCK IT, FUCK IT UP
