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“I’d like to occupy a ‘minor’ position in your bedroom.”
“I have cake in both hands; I’ll have to use my mouth.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“I have a special room in my mind palace just for you.” Requested by one of my real-life friends, who doesn’t have a Tumblr.
“I want to put my ‘experiment’ in your 'microwave.’” Submitted by imadeyousomeshoes.
“You’re the king of my mind palace.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
The best of Mycroft Holmes, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.
“I’m married to my work, so we’ll have to be discreet.” Requested by one of my real-life friends, who doesn’t have a Tumblr.
The best of Greg Lestrade, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.
The best of Jim Moriarty, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.
“I ♥ U” Requested by one of my real-life friends, who doesn’t have a Tumblr.
“If we were at a restaurant together, I wouldn’t deny that you were my date.”
“Would you like to go round and round the garden like a teddy bear with me?”
The best of John Watson, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.
“Wanna see where my division really is?” Submitted by itsnotokaytolickyourfriends.
“You have very sexy skin that I wouldn’t mind making into shoes.” Submitted by britishentertainmentobsession.
“I always hear ‘sit on my face’ when you’re speaking, but it’s usually subtext.” Submitted by verity-burns.
“Wanna see MY crown jewels?” Submitted by custardcreems.
“You make my saliva coagulate.” Submitted by soiguessimhangingherenow.
“You can stand under my umbrella.” Submitted by anonymous.
“If there was a fire, you’d be my priority exposed.”
“Being without each other… Isn’t it hateful?”
“If you think my cheekbones are prominent, just wait until you see the bone in my pants.”
“I would have dinner with you even if I wasn’t hungry.”
“I never want to say ‘LATERZ!’ to you.”
“I think you’re really brainy. And I mean that in the new sense of the word.”
“I’ll help you excrete the drug out of your system.” Submitted by maskedcity.
“Even if there weren’t snipers aiming at you, I’d still fall for you.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“I’ll expose my priorities if you’ll set me on fire.” Submitted by thefinalmix.
“Who cares about decent? I am turned on!”
“I’m inside you with my umbrella.”
“I would sponsor a serial killer just to get your attention.”
“Want me to make you moan like my text alert?”
“I’d like to get some from you… And I’m not talking about cigarettes.”
“I’d like to get a double room in Dartmoor with you.”
“Would you let me come into your ‘cab’ with my 'harpoon’?”
“Will you be my division?”
“I would drink your coffee even if the sugar was drugged.”
“If you were my holiday, I wouldn’t need to fancy another one.”
“My dick is so huge, my doggy style is referred to as Baskerville Hound style.”
“I would put the finger on you just to get you off.” Submitted by anonymous.
The best of Scotland Yard (Greg Lestrade, Sally Donovan, and Sylvia Anderson), from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.
“So, you’ve got a boyfriend then? I’ll have you either way. It’s all fine.”
“Yes, I said that the laptop was in THE bedroom. No, that wasn’t a typo.”
“Let me be your umbrella. You can open me over your ‘head’ any time you want.” Submitted by thedithatcould.
“If I met you at work, I’d totally leave my number under a dish.”
“You make me go ‘Oh my GAAAAAWD!’ more than a hydraulic bed.”
“There’s no charge to ride me.” Based on a suggestion by tophatsandfedoras, who wanted cab-driving Moriarty.
“I’d hit that 1895 times.”
“I can shoot it so far, not even Vatican Cameos will save you.”
“It’s a good thing I find breathing boring, because you take my breath away.”
“Shall I show you the code to my safe?”
“I regret deleting the solar system, because you are out of this world.”
“I’ll be the knife and you be the Cluedo board: Let me pin you against the wall.”
“I won’t just be mother– I’ll be a MILF.”
“Rank isn’t the only thing I enjoy pulling.” Submitted by custardcreems.
“Do I want to see some more of you? Oh, God yes.”
The best of Irene Adler, from BBC Sherlock pick-up lines.
“Let’s film a different kind of video on my phone.” Submitted by tophatsandfedoras.
“I wanted to be a pirate so I could get at your booty.”
“I would chase you all over London even if my limp wasn’t psychosomatic.”