brokenpencilsharpener:I have these two neighbours and they’re married and they gotta be like in their late 30s and I’m making dinner and I look out the window and they’re running around outside in their pajamas and bare feet with water pistols soaking : NSFW Tumblr

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Blog: FDA Approved Cunt

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So I woke up this morning in a pool of my own blood.

50% genius | 50% dummy

fab-fun-potatoe: My sister went to go see “Unfriended” in theaters. And there was a scene where the girl creepily asked, “Who is it?” And a dude in the audience yelled “DEEZ NUTS!” and everyone broke out in laughter while a girl was being

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Just Wingin' It

tastefullyoffensive: Enlarged to show texture. (photo via bizcat)

likesdads: baerials: likesdads: when bae says he ate pineapple today but then u realize he’s a damn liar Y’all know pineapple and fruit and stuff only affects your load after a couple days right, it’s not immediate, to get a consistent effect

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