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gonna eat these hot pockets and despair. i know how to cook, but all i have is microwavable junk food. and microwavable pork rinds. i even shop like a loser bachelor, milk and cigarettes. i dont even like milk. but i buy milk constantly. i keep milk.

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original: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/knifeandlighter/122911842191

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i never made it past the tutorial in metal gear solid peace walker. i got mad at the controls and started playing Ac!d. im such a goddamn failure and im going to kill myself now that i’ve purged that ancient shame. 

i never made it past the tutorial in metal gear solid peace walker. i got mad at the controls and started playing Ac!d. im such a goddamn failure and im going to kill myself now that i’ve purged that ancient shame. 

all i have in my fridge is iced coffee, energy drinks, condiments for menu items i do not currently possess and have not made in some time. and two cases of coors. i have the saddest fridge in the world. there is literally no food in my house. how in

all i have in my fridge is iced coffee, energy drinks, condiments for menu items i do not currently possess and have not made in some time. and two cases of coors. i have the saddest fridge in the world. there is literally no food in my house. how in

oh and like a million boxes of corndogs and hot pockets in my deep freezer. 

oh and like a million boxes of corndogs and hot pockets in my deep freezer. 

"ground"

"ground"

gunblades replied to your post:radiopastel replied to your post:oh and like a…tf eddie why you always talking about your meat and corndogs?i want someone to volunteer to shop for me so i can stop eating like shit and live to see my 40th birthday. 

gunblades replied to your post:radiopastel replied to your post:oh and like a…tf eddie why you always talking about your meat and corndogs?i want someone to volunteer to shop for me so i can stop eating like shit and live to see my 40th birthday. 

keviinmeow: This is real and they have 4 locations in cali

keviinmeow: This is real and they have 4 locations in cali

gunblades replied to your post:gunblades replied to your post:radiopastel replied…i’ll hook you up w fruit snacks and fettucine alfredoyo, if you keep me in gushers and fruit roll ups i’ll give you a hundred dollar bill every day and tell you

gunblades replied to your post:gunblades replied to your post:radiopastel replied…i’ll hook you up w fruit snacks and fettucine alfredoyo, if you keep me in gushers and fruit roll ups i’ll give you a hundred dollar bill every day and tell you

i ain’t no king and you ain’t no queen. we are two fallible people. dont never call me your king. i don’t have land. i don’t have vassals. i dont have men at arms. i don’t have a moat. i don’t send out writs. i dont do none of that shit.

i ain’t no king and you ain’t no queen. we are two fallible people. dont never call me your king. i don’t have land. i don’t have vassals. i dont have men at arms. i don’t have a moat. i don’t send out writs. i dont do none of that shit.

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