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ellaneedschocolate:uzumakijpeg:uzumakijpeg: have you ever finished a test in 30 minutes and no one else was even close to being done i’m either really smart or i fucked up entirely nailed it or failed it

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live a little (die a lot)

live a little (die a lot)

Cptn Sylver

Cptn Sylver

corvell: one-time-i-dreamt: I was walking in the forest during winter, and saw a wendigo sitting under a tree. I asked it if it was going to kill me. It said, “No, this is just a dream.” So I sat next to it in the snow for a bit and then he said,

corvell: one-time-i-dreamt: I was walking in the forest during winter, and saw a wendigo sitting under a tree. I asked it if it was going to kill me. It said, “No, this is just a dream.” So I sat next to it in the snow for a bit and then he said,

snarthurt: snarthurt: snarthurt: ok, fine. the only reason i buy milk in bags and not big ol’ jugs is because they just don’t fucking sell them in jugs. it’s stupid. i now see that it is stupid. i feel like im living in hell with these shitty bags

snarthurt: snarthurt: snarthurt: ok, fine. the only reason i buy milk in bags and not big ol’ jugs is because they just don’t fucking sell them in jugs. it’s stupid. i now see that it is stupid. i feel like im living in hell with these shitty bags

captainsnoop: *my underwear shrinks and explodes like in an anime, exposing my privates* aww fuck

captainsnoop: *my underwear shrinks and explodes like in an anime, exposing my privates* aww fuck

lmaonade:wow i sure hope *starts smacking my neck* THERES NO VAMPIRES AROUND. *slaps my neck really really hard* i HOPE there’s NO vampires who might want to BITE ME and suck my blood right here from my *i am smacking so godforsakenly hard* NECK 

lmaonade:wow i sure hope *starts smacking my neck* THERES NO VAMPIRES AROUND. *slaps my neck really really hard* i HOPE there’s NO vampires who might want to BITE ME and suck my blood right here from my *i am smacking so godforsakenly hard* NECK 

lameblr: lameblr: millennials have no brand loyalty because they’re poor not bc they’re disloyal survey: what brand of toilet paper do you buy and why?me: whatever’s on sale my ass ain’t picky

lameblr: lameblr: millennials have no brand loyalty because they’re poor not bc they’re disloyal survey: what brand of toilet paper do you buy and why?me: whatever’s on sale my ass ain’t picky

nuderefsarebest:

nuderefsarebest:

sealedbeastnue:“what time is it” you ask, i pull out my 2.7 metric ton granite sundial and immediately crush both of your feet, I loudly announce “it is cloudy”

sealedbeastnue:“what time is it” you ask, i pull out my 2.7 metric ton granite sundial and immediately crush both of your feet, I loudly announce “it is cloudy”

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