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spacetwinks: “everything’s bigger in texas,” i say, leading her out to the back of the ranch. “look at that miniature horse, for example" i continue, and then point at just a regular horse

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original: https://berandomness.tumblr.com/post/175838238253

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yourplayersaidwhat: DM: What do you want to do to seduce this woman? Gnome Wizard: I gnaw on her ankles seductively. DM:Alright, roll for persuasion. Wizard:*Rolls nat 20* Barbarian: He bites her ankles just a little, and she’s instantly wet.

yourplayersaidwhat: DM: What do you want to do to seduce this woman? Gnome Wizard: I gnaw on her ankles seductively. DM:Alright, roll for persuasion. Wizard:*Rolls nat 20* Barbarian: He bites her ankles just a little, and she’s instantly wet.

the-macra: person: whats the word for like hands but on your legsme:

the-macra: person: whats the word for like hands but on your legsme:

surprisebitch: jayliens: surprisebitch: Reinhardt’s cock has to be 11.7 inches length-wise and 8.5 inches girth-wise (circumference) and it is probably alot for my ass to handle.. that it’ll end up looking like my hole got earth-shattered after

surprisebitch: jayliens: surprisebitch: Reinhardt’s cock has to be 11.7 inches length-wise and 8.5 inches girth-wise (circumference) and it is probably alot for my ass to handle.. that it’ll end up looking like my hole got earth-shattered after

dickslappers: hungry-joe: Saw this on a tracklisting: and this is what hell brain read: this is what a true gentleman says before climax

dickslappers: hungry-joe: Saw this on a tracklisting: and this is what hell brain read: this is what a true gentleman says before climax

vrisbians: this is so sad alexa kill your ceo

vrisbians: this is so sad alexa kill your ceo

froody: froody: here’s a concept: a cool old-timey pirate boss but instead of having a parrot on his shoulder it’s just a really really big snail which is exotic and terrifying to all his victims pirate: gimme my cut or I’ll feed ye to Leonard

froody: froody: here’s a concept: a cool old-timey pirate boss but instead of having a parrot on his shoulder it’s just a really really big snail which is exotic and terrifying to all his victims pirate: gimme my cut or I’ll feed ye to Leonard

human-power: dancing around your room to music is one of the ultimate forms of self care

human-power: dancing around your room to music is one of the ultimate forms of self care

themysteriousmurasamecastle: captainsnoop: do people that say shit like “ooh nobody reads anymore, they only use their phones and computers” think that computers and phones can only display pictures and make sounds  like do they think words can’t

themysteriousmurasamecastle: captainsnoop: do people that say shit like “ooh nobody reads anymore, they only use their phones and computers” think that computers and phones can only display pictures and make sounds  like do they think words can’t

mlgspacememe: jamtastik: thighetician: kinghispaniola: If you’re not ready to fight an alligator over your best friend dont even think about coming to Florida Apex predators Yooooo Florida culture is living in a real life Jurassic park yet

mlgspacememe: jamtastik: thighetician: kinghispaniola: If you’re not ready to fight an alligator over your best friend dont even think about coming to Florida Apex predators Yooooo Florida culture is living in a real life Jurassic park yet

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