a-pedophile-potato: weedjoke420: one time in 7th grade i was having unbearable intestinal pain like i could not move at all it hurt so bad so i went to the nurse and she sent me home and the second i got home i farted for legitimately 45 seconds and : NSFW Tumblr

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"I dont get along with other girls because girls are so bitchy"

elijahkrantz: I found out santa wasnt real because I got a spy kit that christmas so i fingerprinted my mom and matched it to the fingerprints i dusted on the milk mug i left out… Im on that next level shit

kushandwizdom: More good vibes here

2srooky: One time in sixth grade I was being bullied really badly, and this whole circle of people gathered around me and the girl that was bullying me, and she smirked and went ‘You dumb rich bitch.’ And everyone was like OOOOOOH and I stood there

verticaliciouss: doperespect: same literally me